Tag - windows

Awesome and Funny Technology Quotes | Windows Linux Provisions

keep

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign respect for technical incompetence.
%
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
%
Oh, and we just set fire to your desktop.
%
BYTE editors are people who separate the wheat from the chaff, and then
carefully print the chaff.
%
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
%
To err is human… to really foul up requires the root password.
%
Alan Turing thought about criteria to settle the question of whether
machines can think, a question of which we now know that it is about
as relevant as the question of whether submarines can swim.
— Dijkstra
%
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo.
– Andy Finkel, computer guy
%
Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.
— Rich Kulawiec
%
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error.
— Weisert
%
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
%
HOST SYSTEM NOT RESPONDING, PROBABLY DOWN. DO YOU WANT TO WAIT? (Y/N)
HOST SYSTEM RESPONDING, PROBABLY UP…
%
How much net work could a network work, if a network could net work?
%
I am a computer. I am dumber than any human and smarter than any administrator.
%
“Nuclear war can ruin your whole compile.”
— Karl Lehenbauer
%
Linux — the OS for the Renaissance Man
%
One picture is worth 128K words.
%
The UNIX philosophy basically involves giving you enough rope to
hang yourself. And then a couple of feet more, just to be sure.
%
Unix gives you enough rope to shoot yourself in the foot.
%
Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised)
are called hardware; those program instructions that you can only curse
at are called software.
— Levitating Trains and Kamikaze Genes: Technological
Literacy for the 1990’s.
%
The difference between Microsoft and ‘Jurassic Park’:
In one, a mad businessman makes a lot of money with beasts that should be
extinct.
The other is a film.
%
The gates in my computer are AND, OR and NOT; they are not Bill.
%
“Nobody will ever need more than 640k RAM!”
— Bill Gates, 1981
“Windows 95 needs at least 8 MB RAM.”
— Bill Gates, 1996
“Nobody will ever need Windows 95.”
— logical conclusion
%
Windows 98: Not Plug & Play, but Bug & Pay!
%
Q: How many IBM CPU’s does it take to execute a job?
A: Four; three to hold it down, and one to rip its head off.
%
Those who can’t write, write manuals.
%
Don’t trouble trouble until trouble troubles you…
%
import xmlrpclib
srv = xmlrpclib.Server(‘http://www.microsoft.com/’)
for employee in srv.MainDepartment.personnel(): srv.fireEmployee(employee)
— found in Python XML-RPC example
%
Q: What’s tiny and yellow and very, very, dangerous?
A: A canary with the super-user password.
%
System going down at 5 this afternoon to install scheduler bug.
%
Never trust a computer you can’t repair yourself.
%

Read More