4 New Funny Omegle Convos | Funniest Omegle Logs
connecting to server…
you’re now chatting with a random stranger. say hi!
stranger: greetings you delicious stranger
you: thanks
stranger: that wasn’t a compliment
you: i know
stranger: how was your day?
stranger: did you meet tim at the mall?
you: yeah
stranger: that guy is such a douche
stranger: don’t you think?
you: yeah i think so too
stranger: i know you are a spambot
stranger: bye forever
connecting to server…
stranger: hi
stranger: a/s/l
you: tell me a story
stranger: once upon a time
stranger: there was a stranger
stranger: he said
stranger: f_ck you
connecting to server…
looking for someone you can chat with. hang on.
you’re now chatting with a random stranger. say hi!
you: you walk into a room and see a flash what do you do?
stranger: turn around and walk out
you: cowardice.
you: you lost the game.
connecting to server…
looking for someone you can chat with. hang on.
you’re now chatting with a random stranger. say hi!
stranger: hi
you: you walk into a room and see a flash what do you do?
stranger: smile
you: unable to see anything, you smiled. someone suddenly thrust something like a microphone in your hands, then walked back into the room. what you do?
stranger: speak
you: you spoke.
you: as the flash thins off, you notice several beaten down and a few dead people in the room, and a staircase going down.
you: you look at your hand and see a small blunt weapon covered in blood.
you: you started to hear police sirens. what you do?
stranger: run
you: you started running. two police officers saw you. they drew their guns and started shooting. what you do?
stranger: ninja
you: you try to ninja your way out. a bullet pierced through your forehead. h_adshot, b_tch.
you: you lost the game.
stranger: lawl
Thanks M. Tekin for the logs
There's 154 Comments So Far
May 6th, 2009 at 8:55 pm
You: yes!
You: thats absolutely correct.
Stranger: I agree!
You: let us celebrate our success!
Stranger: commence party!
You: ale and whores for everyoone!!!
Stranger: Sounds like a plan! Success is sweet! Oh so sweet!
You: too sweet. i have diabeetus.
You: i must have an insulin party for a moment!
You: >.> <..>!
Stranger: Luckily for you I have a walrus mustache, thus know all about the diabeetus
You: excelent. i am running low on supplies, i fear i may not make it through the long winter. advice?
Stranger: Did you know it’s caused by tiny demons living in your blood cells? And that it can be overcome with sheer willpower?!
You: *lights all medicines on fire*
You: sweet!
Stranger: YES! WELL DONE!
You: im gonna start eating the bible!!!
You: demons hate the bible!
Stranger: Now all you must do is concentrate!
You: >_.> <.<
You: COMMENSE PARTY!
Stranger: I commend you for your bravery.
Stranger: /armdance
Stranger: /armdance
Stranger: /armdance
You: ah, twas you who commanded the fat one with such meaning
Stranger: This is quite enjoyable.
You: myes
Stranger: I must go.
You: you will be missed
Stranger: But I will never forget this encounter
You: never.
Stranger: AWAAAAAAAAaaaaaayyyyyyyyy……….
May 26th, 2009 at 9:53 pm
Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: No thanks, I dont smoke.
Stranger: …
Stranger: age? sex? location?
You: well its the space age, I restrain from sex, location of what?Stranger: …ewkay
You: do you have any lizards?
Stranger: no but im going to buy a snake
You: Ohhh nice
You: A big one?
You: With fangs?
Stranger: ye
You: you forgot the “S”
You: SILLY button
Stranger: yes
You: You’re really cool.
You: Wanna marry me??
Stranger: okey
Stranger: u dont mind all my scars?
You: No, not at all.
You: I accept them as a part of you.
Stranger: your the furst 1 to acccept my cuts
You: I just want you to know (whats your name?)I wanna grow old with you
Stranger: im an assasin
You: really? what kind?
Stranger: what kind? the kind that kills ppl for money…
You: hahaa. ohh
You: that sounds exciting.
You: I dont think I could do that. Ninjas scare me
Stranger: okey
You: but you my dear, are just so brave
Stranger: =)
You: you could face a truck load of ninjas
Stranger: =)
Stranger: ba
You: Dont be modest honey.
You: I know you could
Stranger: idont think so
You: really? you couldnt?
You: What kind of assasin are you?
Stranger: the kind that kills ppl for money
Stranger: ….
You: The good kind, thats right
Stranger: owkey
You: Damn right
Stranger: …
May 30th, 2009 at 12:42 pm
You: hey
Stranger: yo
Stranger: how goes it?
Stranger: i like people
You: it goes good
You: i eat people
Stranger: people taste bad
Stranger: i prefer cows
You: i know!
You: same
You: well im indian
You: the cow is sacred
You: but i kill the bastards anyway
You: dont tell the authorities
Stranger: haha
You: i like killing cows
You:
Stranger: i’m a vegetarian
Stranger: and i secretly like killing cows too!
June 2nd, 2009 at 9:37 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: hey
You: how’s it going?
Stranger: pretty good, and you?
You: good, thanks
You: where are you from?
Stranger: california
Stranger: you?
You: illinois
You: what brings you to omegle tonight?
Stranger: the thrill
You: ah
Stranger: cause im so fuckin horny hehe
You: it is rather thrilling
You: lol
Stranger: i love cyber
You: aww
You: how cute
Stranger: huh?
Stranger: hahah
Stranger: xD
You: i would like to pat you on the head and giggle
You: you must be what, 16?
Stranger: why is that?
Stranger: no 26
Stranger: wtf
You: seriously?
You: and still like cyber?
Stranger: yes -_-
Stranger: yup
You: XD
Stranger: im tired of oo much real cock
Stranger: too*
Stranger: hahaha
You: haha
Stranger: hahah
You: but real cock is better than pretend cock ;D
Stranger: are you male or female?
You: female
You: ^_^
Stranger: no homo hahhah i love pussy
Stranger: how old are you?
You: 21 you?
Stranger: 26
You: oh yeah
You: i knew that
You: why did you call me a homo for liking the cock?
Stranger: no i mean me
Stranger: i said cock
Stranger: im 26/M/California
You: okey dokey
You: so you’re tired of real cock
You: and want pretend pussy?
Stranger: no hahahah nvm
Stranger: i want pussy
You: oh really?
You: Dr. Freud doesn’t think so
Stranger: WTF?
You: search your feelins
You: you know it to be true
Stranger: wtf?
Stranger: are you some kind of guru?
Stranger: tryin to be all gypsy like and wise
You: if by guru you mean sith, then yes ^_^
Stranger: this aint star wars hahah
Stranger: are you a nerd?
You: mmm baby
You: park your starship in my bay
Stranger: now were talking
You: I’ve been talking all along
You: I don’t know what you’ve been doing
Stranger: why are you such a smartass?
Stranger: im just trying to have some fuuuuun
You: why are you such a…person?
You: me too!
You: aren’t you having fun, babe?
Stranger: yes mommy
Stranger: what is your ethnicity?
You: I was born with a rare condition
You: tumor syphilis isis osis
Stranger: bullshit
You: i’m zebra striped!
You: mmm
You: interracial
Stranger: ohh mixed with what?
Stranger: oh yeah
Stranger: black and white
You: zebra
Stranger: sorry
You: *neigh*
You: would you brush my mane for me?
Your conversational partner has disconnected
June 4th, 2009 at 5:21 pm
*Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You know when you was a kid?
You: Did you wish you had pokemon?
You: Like real life pokemon?
Stranger: yeah
You: Fucking nerd, no wonder you’ll never get laid.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 18th, 2009 at 11:05 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: yo mama so fat dat when she jump fo jow she got stuck
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 20th, 2009 at 5:16 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: so, do you have feelings?
You: I do
Stranger: Fag.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 24th, 2009 at 5:28 pm
You: hey
Stranger: A wild abra appears
You: great ball!
Stranger: PIMG
Stranger: PING
Stranger: PING
Stranger: wobble
Stranger: wobble
Stranger: wobble
Stranger: SUCCES! WILD ABRA WAS CAUGHT!
You: yipee
Stranger: Give Nickname to wild abra?
You: No.
Stranger: No. was sent to proffesor faggots box!
Stranger: SUCK MY DICK!
June 29th, 2009 at 11:01 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hey
Stranger: What up
You: nothing
You: how about you?
Stranger: Tired. It’s almost 1 in the morning
You: no its not
You: dont lie
You: its 2.54 in the afternoon
You: ive known you for 44 secs and your already lying
Stranger: Haha truth. Nj is dead quiet
You: again with the lies
You: MJ is dead quiet
You: no more shall he sing
Stranger: F off
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 5th, 2009 at 12:14 pm
You: hey
You: asl
Stranger: hi
You: lmao
Stranger: 16 f indonesia
You: i like
You: <3
Stranger: u?
You: 48 m canada
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 5th, 2009 at 11:11 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: Can I ask you a personal question?
Stranger: depends
You: On?
Stranger: the question
You: Well… Can I have a bite of your speghetti?
Stranger: no
You: awh man!
You: I even brought my spoon it eat it with.
You: :`(
You: please.
Stranger: well, interesting
Stranger: show me you spoon first
You: That would be impossible, kind stranger.
Stranger: who are you?
Stranger: okay
You: For my special speghetti eating spoon is invisable.
You: Not really invisible, because I can see it.
You: Just no one else can.
You: It’s complicated, really.
Stranger: well I cannot
Stranger: ur right
You: I know. That’s usually what a lot of people say.
Stranger: what do you exactly want?
Stranger: are you really hungry or what?
You: Just a bite of your spegetti.
You: No. I just want to taste it. =9
Stranger: it should taste good to someone
You: Well, I want to see if it does or not.
You: And you will not let me. :`(
Stranger: I may if I have one
You: You know, one of my life long dreams is to go to France and eat some speghetti. You know, cause they’re Italian and everything. Those Italians make some killer speghetti.
Stranger: well, do not understand why France has anything to do with Italian spaghetti?
Stranger: I guess there are spaghetti anywhere. Even Italian spaghetti.
You: HELLO. France is the home of the Itailians.
Stranger: Sorry I really did not know that.
You: You should do some brushing up on your geography.
Stranger: well… Are the italians in italy?
You: No. I already told you… They are in France.
You: Gosh, Stranger. You can be so dumb sometimes.
Stranger: well good luck with you dreams
You: Thank you. I’m glad you support me.
Stranger: hope one day will be able to go to France for the italian spaghetti
You: You’re kinda like a bra, you know, stranger.
Stranger: why
Stranger: just do not understand the logic behind that
You: because you give support.
You: DUH.
Stranger: wow
You: See. Told you you can be kinda dumb sometimes, Stranger.
Stranger: okay
You: I’m glad you agree.
Stranger: what local time is it now
You: Time for a bite of your speghetti.
Stranger: it does not matter why you are dumb or not. You will have to make money to make a living
Stranger: good luck with Italian spaghetti
Stranger: good day
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 7th, 2009 at 5:35 pm
Stranger: bienvenido a mcdonad en que puedo ayudarlo?
You: Francais?
You: Oui Oui!
Stranger: no
Stranger: español mieda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: Bonjour!
Stranger: spanish!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111
You: Si!
You: Bonjour!
Stranger: fuck off
You: wanna watch?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 8th, 2009 at 11:53 am
For the Idiocracy movie lovers…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hey
You: Welcome to Costco, I love you
Stranger: i love you too
You: where’s your tattoo?
You: why come you don’t have a tattoo?
Stranger: you know how i know it’s real love?
You: i like havin sex with chicks
You: I like money too
You: you like money and havin sex with chicks. we should hang out
Stranger: okay
Stranger: das coo
You: do you know where the time machine is?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 8th, 2009 at 12:00 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: ı m guy and ı want to talk on webcam wıth girls.
You: wow, you’re a fuckin loser
You: hahahaha
You: get a life, perv
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
or save this log or send us feedback.
July 14th, 2009 at 8:59 pm
You: Do you need a silencer when you shoot a
mime?
Stranger: hi
Stranger: silencer.. absolutely no sound.. mime does not scream
Stranger: no silencer.. bang.. other ppl hear u
Stranger: sneak up on the mime and strangle him
Stranger: better
Stranger: or knife to the throat
You: ill strangle him with my panties
Stranger: dude.. u wear panties..
Stranger: thats kinda kinky
July 21st, 2009 at 8:12 am
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hi
Stranger: asl
Stranger: ?
You: i have no age
You: i’m the time itself
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 21st, 2009 at 10:00 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: are you a girl?
You: hello
You: ye
Stranger: wanna cyber
You: are you horny
Stranger: yea
You: this is going on funny junk .com and 4chan
Stranger: this is going on the OT
You have disconnected.
July 25th, 2009 at 4:35 am
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: im a 16 m looking for a horny female
You: I am horny
Stranger: really
You: I’m a lizard, i have alot of horns on my head
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 28th, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: Sharon. Where the fuck did you go?
You: Im here, goddammit.
You: What do you want?!
Stranger: Go shoot the dog
Stranger: it ate my sock
You: Come on, you know i love scruffy.
You: I grew up with him!
Stranger: too fucking bad. you let him eat my sock
Stranger: THAT WAS MY FAVORITE SOCK
You: NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR GOD DAMN SOCK!
Stranger: I CARE ABOUT MY SOCK
Stranger: YOU CARE ABOUT THE FUCKING DOG
You: YOUR RIGHT, MORE THAN YOUR STUPID SOCK! it had a bunch of holes anyway. Scruffy was doing you a favor.
Stranger: well don’t get mad when he poops the sock out on your bed.
Stranger: its not my fault you let him poop everywhere
Stranger: i can’t fucking deal with your bullshit anymore
You: He’s old! When your old im not going to just take you out back and shoot you!
You: Actually..im thinking of doing that now.
Stranger: I’m the one with the gun babe
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 31st, 2009 at 1:46 pm
Stranger: hii
You: you walk into a room a see 5 dead people, what do you do?
Stranger: cry =(
You: no you FAIL
August 3rd, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hey
You: GRENADES!!!!
Stranger: WATCH OUT
Stranger: MG FIRE !!!
You: mah ga
You: we’re fucked
Stranger: DAMN
Stranger: TAKE COVER
You: call airstrike
You: where’s the radio man
Stranger: NO RADIO
You: GODDAMIT
Stranger: EVAC AS SOON AS POSSIBLE
Stranger: U COPY ?
You: no, im bob
August 4th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: oioiopi
You: will you marry me?
Stranger: yes
You: thank god
You: i have to marry soon or my mother will kill me
Stranger: JLKLKLHKJL’ where are you from?
You: alabama
Stranger: ALABANA? whats?
You: its a state in the u.s. of a.
Stranger: hm, cool
You: what kind of education did you have?
You: i take back my proposal
Stranger: basic
Stranger: im dumb
You: basic? in where?
You: do you have aids?
Stranger: NO *–* pls
You: i do
Stranger: :p
You: my brother gave them to me
Stranger: i’m brazilian okay?
Stranger: *fear*
Stranger: tchau
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
August 8th, 2009 at 7:07 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: A wild abra has appeared!
Stranger: that’s ok. i swing danced with a walrus in tibet.
You: Oh, that makes everything better.
Stranger: i know. except for the fact that my purple duffle bag broke.
You: Awww. Did you take it to the hospital?
Stranger: yeah, but it was too late. but then i found a monkey with a latte and we went clubbing.
You: That monkey was my mother…
You: Daddy?
Stranger: son!!
You: Daddy!
Stranger: oh how i missed you!!
You: I’ve missed you more!!!
Stranger: reunited and it feels so good!
You: What is this I hear about a walrus?!!
Stranger: don’t worry. nothing came between your mother and i. the walrus was just a dance partner.
You: We’ll see. We’ll see…
Stranger: don’t tell your sister, though
Stranger: she worries easily
You: My sister is dead…
You: keen to meet you!
Stranger: my oh my i’ve been gone for a long time
Stranger: son, what’s this i hear about you raving in a salt mine
You: It was all lies i tell you!! Lies!! Simon asked me to hold the sodium! It wasn’t mine!! I wasn’t there! I was in peru practising church i tells you, CHURCH!! Anyway, it was james’ fault, not mine! He is a bad influence!! I wasnt the one who said we should go there! You belive me dont you daddy, don’t you??
Stranger: ok son. i believe you. but no more of james. instead you’ll be eating chicken fingers at the bowling alley. with me.
Stranger: we need to bond
Stranger: after all
Stranger: i have been gone for so long
You: Im so sorry, I feel ashamed of my life…
You: James is gone. I deleted his facespace page.
Stranger: no more of that hooligan
You: And his my book, and his friendsta, and his twatter page, and his mytube, and his yahho account…
Stranger: he’s a disasterous stoner
Stranger: i don’t need you smoking the weeds
You: But if I dont smoke pots then I will die!!
Stranger: tsk tsk
Stranger: well then make sure you have a nice bowl
You: Ok.
You: Daddy?
Stranger: i’m glad we had this talk, son
Stranger: yes?
You: I have something to tell you…
Stranger: ok..
You: I…
You: I was that WALRUS!!!
You have disconnected.
August 17th, 2009 at 11:55 am
You: hello
Stranger: Hi
You: from?
Stranger: south korea…
Stranger: u??
You: north
Stranger: north korea??
Stranger: really??
You: yeah, we kicked yo ass
August 25th, 2009 at 12:00 am
You: i mean that would hurt a bit
Stranger: no, YOUR is
You: but im into bondage
You: so thats a-ok
Stranger: okay
Stranger: cool
Stranger: i dont care
Stranger: just give me a kiss
You: ok
Stranger: =)
You: i am getting on plane now
You: ok
You: looking for a seat
You: theres one
Stranger: describe your action please
Stranger: in full details
You: putting my luggage in the overhead compartment
You: taking my seat
You: putting on my seatbelt
Stranger: hahahaha
You: there is a friendly coloured fellow next to me
You: we have a chat about the weather
Stranger: GAY
Stranger: uh-huh?
You: and why we are going to our destination
Stranger: and?
Stranger: what destination?
You: little did i know, he would play a major part in the downfall of society
You: you
Stranger: to where?
You: where you are
Stranger: me?
Stranger: i’m a girl loser
Stranger: >.>
You: i know
You: i am going to where you are
You: on a plane
You: and i met this nice fellow on the plane
You: now they are taxiing
You: there is a queue for the run way
Stranger: what are you trying to tell me?
You: the plane is now building up speed
You: i am now taking off
You: i am in the air rising higher
Stranger: GET A LIFE. I WAS JUST PLAYING YOU ANYWAY. XP.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
lolz
August 25th, 2009 at 12:35 am
Stranger: hey
You: Hi buddy
Stranger: m or f ?
You: Believe it or not, I’m a unicellular being.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hi
You: Have you been to church, son?
Stranger: no
Stranger: why?
You: ‘Cause the time’s coming
Stranger: oh
You: No, just kidding
You: I love to say shit to break through the ice.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You: Hey!
Stranger: I NOM ON PEOPLES THOUGHTS
Stranger: IM A THOUGHT NOMMER
Stranger: OMNOMNOMNOMNOM
You: You have a career in front of you, son!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
August 29th, 2009 at 12:40 am
Stranger: Zydrate comes in a little glass vial!
You: rawr
Stranger: Baa?
You: RAWWWR!!
You: (imma a dinsaur)
Stranger: OH GAWD A DINOSAUR DUN EAT MEH!
Stranger: -hides-
You: RAWWWWWWRAR!
You: (ill eat you if i want to)
Stranger: Nuuu, dun eat the little lamb! baaaa!
You: rawrrr???
You: RAWRRRRARAWWRARARWRR!!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: OH god -dies-
You: nom nom nom – eats dead body
Stranger: -is now gohst lamb- Imma haunt you
Stranger: ghost*
You: RawwR?
Stranger: Yeah, Ghost lamb is gonna haunt you everywhere you go
You: _ eats gohst lamb_
Stranger: well
You: Rawwr
Stranger: fuck
Stranger: Dino 2, Lamb 0
You: rawr
Stranger: Though my body had worms. >D
You: RAWWWWRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!
You: >:(
Stranger: Lamb wins!
You: Immma FACKKIN KILLL YOU!!! RAWWWWRRRR!!!!!!!
Stranger: I dead already. You ate my worm riddled body
Stranger: and ghost
Stranger: remember?
You: I dont need to remember Rawwwr
Stranger: Then you will never remember the worms in your tummy!
Stranger: That is a win win situation!
You: Rawr!
Stranger: I think we were meant to be best friends, Dinosaur!
You: rawrrrr, prrrrrrrrr
Stranger: Yay! -petpetpet-
You: (yes dinosaurs purrrr)
You: purrrrrr
Stranger: They do purr! I have heard them!
You: RAWWWR -dies of worms-
Stranger: NOOOOOOOOOOOO
Stranger: DINO!
Stranger: I SHALL AVENGE YOU
You: -dead-
Stranger: >>
Stranger: <<
Stranger: -eats-
You: -gone-
Stranger: -dies-
You: hahaha -was playing dead-
You: -sees friend is dead-
You: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Stranger: -is ghost-
You: -dies for real-
Stranger: Im not dead dead!
You: -ghost too-
Stranger: YAY!
Stranger: Ghost buddies!
You: lets go do ghost stuff
You: rawr
Stranger: Lets kick the Ghost busters butts!
You: RAWRRR
Stranger: YAY! I have dino ghost!
You: LETS GO!
Stranger: -goes to kick Ghost Busters butts-
Stranger: -gets zapped up-
Stranger: NOOO
Stranger: AVENGE ME!
You: i will
You: – goes to avenge-
Stranger: YUS!
You: -they cross the streams-
Stranger: OH NOES!
You: -dies again-
Stranger: NOOOO DINO! MY ONLY FRIEND!
Stranger: I never told you
Stranger: I loved you
Stranger: -sob-
You: RAWRRR by forever!!!
You have disconnected.
August 30th, 2009 at 4:40 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: hey
Stranger: hey
Stranger: are you ready for this?
You: go on…
Stranger: ok
Stranger: i start
Stranger: one word
You: go on..
Stranger: you follow
You: yes
Stranger: make a story
You: what kind of story?
Stranger: doesnt matter
Stranger: ready?
You: r
Stranger:
Stranger: They
You: fucked
Stranger: their
You: moms
Stranger: husbands
You: and
Stranger: contracted
You: about
Stranger: a
You: penis
Stranger: covered
You: with
Stranger: peanut
You: butter
Stranger: although
You: it
Stranger: tasted
You: like
Stranger: penis
You: so
Stranger: then
You: it
Stranger: got
You: really
Stranger: soft
You: and
Stranger: they
You: tried
Stranger: to
You: destroy
Stranger: what
You: they
Stranger: had
You: with
Stranger: a
You: large
Stranger: and
You: heavy
Stranger: sledgehammer
You: that
Stranger: smelled
You: like
Stranger: rancid
You: penis
Stranger:
You: ahahahaha
You: this is so fun
Stranger: that was fun
You: yeah
You: hahaha
You: upload it somewhere
You: hehe
Stranger: haha yeah sure
Stranger: bye
You: cya
September 2nd, 2009 at 5:59 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: toot
You: beep toot
Stranger: boot
Stranger: boot poot
You: beep
You: beep boop?
Stranger: bopp
You: boob?
Stranger: beep bep toot
You: boob boob
You: =boobs
Stranger: poop poop
Stranger: = diareah
You: lol
Stranger: haha
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
September 7th, 2009 at 9:02 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: I hate people.
You: I’m going to just live by myself in a cave.
You: No one else, just me.
Stranger: i agree with you
Stranger: i hate people tooo
Stranger: thats why i live in antartica
You: I don’t believe you.
You: At all.
Stranger: okay.
You: Research base?
Stranger: yeah
You: Which one?
Stranger: idk
Stranger: i was just kidding i live in america
You: I thought so.
Stranger: new yorkk
You: Anyone smart enough to get onto a research base is smart enough to use capital letters.
Stranger: fuck you alright.
You: Maybe after dinner.
Stranger: okay sounds good.
Stranger: were do you live
You: It starts with ‘K”
You: and ends in “entucky”
Stranger: KENTUCKY
You: Wow.
You: Didn’t think you could do it.
Stranger: thanks. im glad you have faith in me. i appreciate it.
You: Happy to encourage.
Stranger: your very nice.
You: *you’re
You: And yes, I am.
Stranger: you’re* excuse mee. mr/mrs grammer police
You: *grammar
Stranger: shutuppp.
You: *Shut up
Stranger: okay.
You: *Okay.
Stranger: Okay
You: *Okay.
Stranger: Okay.
You: You say “okay” a lot.
Stranger: Are You A Male Or A Female?
You: P
You: E
You: N
You: I
You: S
Stranger: Guy?
You: I gave you a hint.
Stranger: Thanks
You: Do you solve it yet?
Stranger: Yeah
You: What’s the answer?!
Stranger: MALE
You: *DING DING DING*
You: Let’s tell ‘em what they’ve won, Johnny!
You: Nothing!
Stranger: yay
Stranger: your a dick. fuck you.
You: *you’re
Stranger: shut the fuck up
You: *Shut the fuck up.
Stranger: You’re a Cool Person. Im Jealous Of You.
You: *I’m
Stranger: shut the fuck up you dick
You: My dick isn’t the one typing.
You: If it was, my spelling would be as bad as yours.
Stranger: suck my twat
You: I’d rather have you tested for diseases first.
Stranger: okay.
You: *Okay.
Stranger: You fucking grammar nazi
You: *You fucking grammar Nazi.
Stranger: alrightt. your cool im jealous goodbye you dickhead. SUCK MY MOTHERFUCKING TWAT.
Stranger: or better off suck your dickk. if you have one
You: You’ve fucked your mother with your twat?
You: Strap-on?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
September 17th, 2009 at 2:11 pm
You: Knock Knock
Stranger: WHOS THAR
You: KGB
Stranger: HOLY SHIT
Stranger: they found me!
You: WE HAVE COME TO TAKE YOU AWAY
Stranger: PLEASE NO I GIVE YOU MY DAUGHTER!
You: Insufficient!
You: She is homley…
You: Gus your son…
Stranger: My son?
You: Yes, gus
You: He is…
You: Intreiging…
Stranger: My son is married with 4 children babies
Stranger: and has biiig
Stranger: house
You: Then what r u afraid of?
Stranger: Fine I will give you my son
You: *SLAP* WE WILL ASK THE QUESTIONS HERE!!!
Stranger: SORRY I QUESTIONED MY SUPREME GOVERNMENT
Stranger: TAKE MY WHOLE FAMILY!!!
You: Clasp em’ in irons boys… Mabey take him outside for a little accident
Stranger: PLEASE SIR NOOOOOOOOOO
Stranger: I HAS GIVE YOU WHEAT AND GRAIN
Stranger: YIS?
You: *CRACK* splat! arg….
You: Clean this up…
Stranger: MY SON DEAR GAWD
You: His life means nothing to mother russia..
Stranger: I have to clean up my own sons body and put in place now yis?
Stranger: then you will leave?!?!?!?!?
You: Yes…. For now
You: BUT WE WILL BACK
Stranger: Good thing im moving to Emerika
Stranger: Oh shit
Stranger: did i say that out loud…
You: I didnt hear it if you didnt…
Stranger: Iz very good
You: very good….
You: BAM
You: BAM BAM BAM’
Stranger: ARRG
You: BAM
You: thump..
Stranger: WHY COMMUNISM WHY??
Stranger: *death*
You: In soviet russia (Blows smoke off of gun) commune isms YOU…
Stranger: DUN DUN DUN
Stranger: (fade out)
Stranger: Ending credits
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
September 24th, 2009 at 6:00 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: i just got punked
You:
Stranger: by a fucking kid
Stranger: bastard
You:
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
You:
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
Stranger:
Stranger:
Stranger: i mean
You:
Stranger:
You:
Stranger:
Stranger:
You:
Stranger: boot your foot
You: Spam your ass off, dude. I’ll see you later.
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
Stranger: you bitch
Stranger: lol
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHA you my bitch
Stranger: you leave now
Stranger: ok
Stranger: its ok for you to leave now
Stranger: go and click
Stranger: disconnect
Stranger:
Stranger: fetch me some apples
Stranger:
Stranger: no red apples
Stranger: you poison bastard
You: What’s this about apples?
Stranger:
You: Have fun spamming.
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
You: Spam with something more creative, please.
Stranger: leave me boring kid
Stranger: go do somthing with your life
Stranger: fetch me somne apples
Stranger: or chips
Stranger: or crips
Stranger: do somthing
Stranger: lazy
You: Eat some nuts and you’ll be fine.
Stranger: git
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
Stranger: AM NOT GAY LIKE YOu
Stranger: i dont suck nuts
Stranger: or eat em
You: Heh.
Stranger: unlike you
You: You sure?
Stranger: ay
Stranger: you got a golf ball in your throat
You: Before you try to call me gay, please spell it with a ‘g’. It’s ‘gay’ not ‘ay’.
Stranger: please stop talking
You: I’m not talking, I’m typing.
Stranger: i said unlike you ay
Stranger: of course you cant read
You: Pathetic insult. Next.
Stranger: YOU are
Stranger: pathetic
Stranger: look in mirror
Stranger: say that
Stranger: dare ya
Stranger: while you at it look at that golf ball
Stranger: yo got jammed in yo throat
You: Ouch, what an insult. I’m scarred for life. Look at me crying. Boo hoo.
Stranger: plastic skin fix that
Stranger: cosmetic
Stranger:
You: Uh, okay?
Stranger: ya ya ya try put it on me
You: You’re very bored aren’t you?
Stranger: when its your face
Stranger: who cares
Stranger: trying do you a favour
You: You are making no sense.
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
Stranger: ALl you Do is SPAm
Stranger: waste Of my TIme
You: I’m not spamming, smart one.
You: That “you epicly fail at spam” thing is just a pathetic comeback when you can’t think of anything to say back to me.
You: Correct?
Stranger: wow
Stranger: you spell bad
Stranger: amazing
Stranger: would you like a spellchecker
Stranger: i can give you one
You: And yet you are the one who can’t even use capitalization or punctuation.
Stranger: is that even english
Stranger: man its bad
You: Wow, you’re running out of insults. Those are pathetic. Either think your insult through carefully or don’t say anything at all.
Stranger: yawn
Stranger: you boring me
Stranger: that it
Stranger: you shrunk
You: I shrunk.
You: Okay then.
Stranger: you try to hard
Stranger: try TO hard
Stranger: omg
Stranger: this funny
You: I try ‘too’ hard, you mean.
Stranger: you gonna try even more harder now or what
You: So far you’re the one spewing out pathetic insults in an attempt to make me angry.
Stranger: poor kid
Stranger: still trying
You: You’re trying too hard, it seems.
Stranger: yes that it
Stranger: copy me
Stranger: YEAH
You: Okay.
Stranger: show i am boss
Stranger: say it agian
Stranger: say it
You: Nah, that’s okay.
Stranger:
Stranger: say i am trying to hard
You: I don’t feel like it.
Stranger: show i am more intelligent than you
Stranger: you copy me
You: Why do you even try?!
Stranger: here you go again
Stranger: trying again
Stranger: tututututut
You: These insults are pathetic! You’re acting like a child!
Stranger: why why why
Stranger: you try
You: Dear god!
Stranger: just give up
Stranger: what are you
Stranger: bot
Stranger: robot
You: No.
Stranger: what one
Stranger: bot or robot
You: I’m not either.
Stranger: must be
Stranger: you trying to hard
Stranger: to think of intelligent words you dont even know what they mean
You: If you’re trying to insult me, you’re failing.
Stranger: you fail
Stranger: at life
Stranger: go on
Stranger: try again
You: Obviously I know what they mean, otherwise I wouldn’t use them.
Stranger: got plenty of goes
Stranger: i bet
You: Anything else to say?
Stranger: go on try again
Stranger: think of somthing else
Stranger: to say
You: Next.
Stranger: amaze ussss
You: Next insult please.
Stranger: can you say
Stranger: chocolate
Stranger: mister tuff man
You: ?
You: Okay…?
You: Next insult please.
Stranger: that it
Stranger: wow
Stranger: you not
Stranger: trying any more
Stranger: you kenw i was right
Stranger: WOOt
Stranger: party
You: I’m not trying anything.
Stranger: i win
Stranger: you fail
Stranger: you stopped trying
You: I’m simply watching you insult me.
Stranger: no
Stranger: that just you
Stranger: trying to hard
Stranger: to find a insult here
Stranger: keep up good work
You: I’m not trying to insult you at all.
Stranger: tryer
You: That’s not even a word.
Stranger: i know
Stranger: it anooyed you
Stranger: tryer
Stranger: tryer
Stranger: i love the word
Stranger: tryer
You: I love how you assumed that it annoyed me.
Stranger: you corrected me
Stranger: you try so hard
Stranger: so it musta
Stranger: anoyed it
Stranger: to you
You: Wow…
Stranger: go on
Stranger: try again
Stranger: am waiting
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAH
You: Next insult please.
Stranger: HHEAHEHAHEHaeawea
Stranger: mowyaohwoahwawmowa
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAH
Stranger: you weak
You: Having fun?
Stranger: you failed
Stranger: given up
Stranger: allready
Stranger: pitty
Stranger: ow well
Stranger: just you fail
You: Anything else to say?
Stranger: you stopped trying to hard
You: Any other insults?
You: Seriously.
Stranger: am waiting
You: Try harder, please.
Stranger: yes yes
Stranger: copy me
Stranger: show i am boss
You: Reusing insults?
You: Tsk tsk.
Stranger: copy meeeeeeee
Stranger: copy meeeeee
You: Please, next insult.
Stranger: yeahhhhhhh
Stranger: can you save this chat
Stranger: to show your friends
Stranger: wonna show them
Stranger: you are thick
Stranger: no insults here
Stranger: only that
Stranger: only type
Stranger: and talk
Stranger: you trying to hard
You: I’ve insulted you only a few times.
You: You’ve “insulted” me many more times.
Stranger: HAHAHA
Stranger: you faile
Stranger: d
You: Done yet?
Stranger: i was done years ago man
Stranger: you still trying
Stranger: so i wait
Stranger: until you are done
Stranger: trying
You: No matter what I say, you’re going to say “you fail” because you’re being very… well, I’m not sure what the word is. Competitive I guess.
Stranger: HAHAAHAH
Stranger: you try to hard
Stranger: man
Stranger: jesus
Stranger: never help you
You: As seen in the above example…
Stranger: HAHAHA
You: I’m waiting.
Stranger: am waiting to
Stranger: for word
Stranger: am not gonna do it agian
Stranger: then you do
Stranger: you trying to hard
You: ?
Stranger: am waiting for line
Stranger: any more insults
Stranger: when the ant any
Stranger: HAHAHA
Stranger: you still trying
Stranger: please say so
Stranger: fun
Stranger: entertaining me
Stranger: every one here
Stranger: is lol at you
Stranger: right now
Stranger: go on
Stranger: say it was a insult
Stranger: i dare ya
Stranger: go on try
You: I’m not trying, I’m waiting to see when the hell you’re going to finish saying “you fail” “try again” etc.
Stranger: AHHAHAHAHA
You: Who knows if you’re lying about people being there laughing at me.
Stranger: #GIGGLES
Stranger: GIGGLEs
Stranger: GIGGLEs
Stranger: ROFl
Stranger: LMAO
Stranger: rofl
Stranger: you still trying
Stranger: keep it up
Stranger: this good for youtube
Stranger: remix at end of night
You: You’re going to put this on youtube?
Stranger: make you look like a gay
Stranger: you try to hard
Stranger: fun to mess with
You: Again: You’re going to put this on youtube?
Stranger: you failed
Stranger: in public eyes
Stranger: yawn
You: …
Stranger: please say more
Stranger: need more info
Stranger: to mess with
Stranger: gota love screen record
Stranger: WOOOOOOooooooooooo
You: Can you stop that for a second and answer my question? Are you REALLY going to put this on youtube?
Stranger: WOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
You: What’s your youtube account? I want to see the video afterwards.
Stranger:
Stranger: see you trying again
Stranger: poor kid
You: You going to say something?
You: Sorry, I’m a slow typer.
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahaaAHAHHAHAhahahaAHAHAHHA you failed
You: …?
Stranger: you belived i was gonna put it on youtube
Stranger: i will now
Stranger: hahaha
You: Okay, what’s your youtube account?
Stranger: looks like you gonna cry then
Stranger: like a baby
Stranger: or somthing
Stranger: you likeeeeee
Stranger: aaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwww
You: You can’t even see me.
Stranger: you gonna put that on youutbe
Stranger: i was like
Stranger: AHHAHAHAHA
Stranger: ROfl
You: Tell me the username of your youtube account.
Stranger: why
You: That way I can see the video afterwards.
Stranger: no
Stranger: you spam it
Stranger: you evil bitch
You: I want to know that you’ll really put it on youtube.
Stranger: trying to hard
You: I don’t believe you’ll really put it on Youtube, so tell me your youtube account so I can see the video later.
You: That way I’ll believe you.
You: If you’re lying then… okay then.
Stranger: LOl
You: That’s a weird thing to lie about. Especially because it won’t affect me at all.
Stranger: sxephil user name why did you wonna know for
You: I wanted to see the video afterwards.
Stranger: i just simply close account
Stranger: HAHAHA
Stranger: you spam it
Stranger: ROfl
You: If I ever spam it, you can report me.
Stranger: no
You: So do you have the balls to put the video on youtube or what?
Stranger: you just simply open lots of account
Stranger: you twat
You: I wouldn’t waste my time with that.
You: Waiting for response…
Stranger: Waiting for response…
Stranger: is so
Stranger: 40′s
Stranger: you perv
You: LOL!
Stranger: LOl
You: That is the most hilarious insult ever! xD
Stranger: i know
You: I’m not joking!
Stranger: it was amusing
Stranger: for me
Stranger: HAHAHAAHHAAHa
Stranger: AHHAHAHAAHAHHA
You: Seriously, it’s a funny insult.
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
You: Are you going to say anything else…?
Stranger: no
Stranger: am amusing you
You: Alright then.
Stranger: not good
Stranger: only amuse my self
Stranger: you fail
Stranger: you fail
Stranger: you fail
Stranger: yes
Stranger: be upset again
Stranger: try again
Stranger: you need to try again
Stranger: keep trying
You: Okay, so why are you so intent on angering me?
Stranger: am not
You: Are you bored…?
Stranger: just amusing my self
Stranger: right now
Stranger: am lol
Stranger: at you
Stranger: can you take it
Stranger: YEAH
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: ROFl
You: That’s exactly what I meant. You’re amusing yourself by trying to get me angry.
You: Uh, why?
Stranger: AHHAHAHAHA
Stranger: am not angering you
Stranger: you all ready angry
Stranger: you pissed off right now
Stranger: you wonna fuck a goat
Stranger: we all heard you
Stranger: wispher it
Stranger: whisperrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Stranger: correct meeeeee
Stranger: why dint you correct me
Stranger: you whore
Stranger: you are my spell checker
Stranger: i nac type ikle ihts
Stranger: ko
You: Yes I am because you can’t type worth crap.
Stranger: LOL
Stranger: ya
Stranger: you angry now
Stranger: mision complete
You: Not really.
Stranger: mission completeeeeee
Stranger: ya it is
You: I can control my anger.
Stranger: Yes I am because you can’t type worth crap. = anger
Stranger: Yes I am because you can’t type worth crap. = anger
Stranger: Yes I am because you can’t type worth crap. = anger
Stranger: Yes I am because you can’t type worth crap. = anger
Stranger: you must read
Stranger: understand
Stranger: Yes I am because you can’t type worth crap.= anger
You: No, I’m simply trying to make YOU angry.
You: I’m pretty sure I’m succeeding.
Stranger: HAHAha
You: Obviously I am.
Stranger: it will not work
You: Since you continue to insult me.
Stranger: i know you
Stranger: all ready
You: Are you angry?
Stranger: HAHA
Stranger: you are a sad little man
Stranger: around age
Stranger: of
Stranger: 20
Stranger: male
Stranger: sad person
Stranger: probley got no job
You: I’m younger then 20.
Stranger: maybe
Stranger: sad ass job
Stranger: mmmm
Stranger: lets think
Stranger: gay student man
Stranger: probley
You: No, not really.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: swimmeer then
Stranger: you do fit profile of a perv
You: No. I don’t like swimming.
Stranger: LOl
Stranger: you said crap
Stranger: so it all fits nw
Stranger: now
You: What?
Stranger: noting
Stranger: just me confusing you
Stranger: it worked
Stranger: woot
Stranger: woot
Stranger: party
Stranger: party
You: I said “I don’t like swimming” and you say I said crap? That doesn’t make sense.
Stranger: .
YOU EPICLY FAIL at spam YOU TRY to hard YoU poor KID YOU HAVE To scroll UP to view YOUR spam losER
You: It’s completely unrelated.
You: You like using that, don’t you.
Stranger: no
Stranger: its outo
Stranger: so i have no control over it
You: Well, you use it a lot…
Stranger: it timed
Stranger: about
Stranger: every
Stranger: 20 mins
Stranger: or so
You: You think I’d believe that?
Stranger: ya
You: LOL!
Stranger: you are gullable
Stranger: right
You: No, I doubt that.
Stranger: you try to hard
Stranger: so gota be
Stranger: might wonna fit in
You: If you thought I would fall for it, you’re the gullible one.
Stranger: so
Stranger: need try harder
Stranger: no realy its outo
Stranger: you loser
Stranger: failed
Stranger: html rocks
Stranger: scripts rock
Stranger: you fail
You: You are the most random person ever.
Stranger: ya
Stranger: i am
Stranger: i like it
Stranger: so sue me
You: But hey, who doesn’t love random.
Stranger: do you like books
You: Yes.
Stranger: i got lots of em
Stranger: wonna help me do a bom fire
Stranger: JOKe
Stranger: HAHAHAHHA
You: Okay…
You: ?
You: Okay then.
Stranger: do you wonna go to asda
Stranger: with me
You: No…
Stranger: ok
Stranger: passed the perv test
Stranger: hahahaha
You: Whoa, you went from insulting me to… well, not insulting me.
You: I don’t even know why we’re doing this.
Stranger: you still here
You: Why are we doing this?
Stranger: i never leave
Stranger: until
Stranger: you click
Stranger: disconnect
Stranger: only way
Stranger: bitch
Stranger: do it
Stranger: dot it
Stranger: dooooo
Stranger: ittttttt
You: Oh I get it. You’re insulting me to get me angry, that way I disconnect and make you mad?
Stranger: no
Stranger: i make you click
You: I mean make ME mad.
Stranger: disconnect
Stranger: i win
Stranger: thats game
Stranger: i have been playing
Stranger: all day
Stranger: so far
Stranger: i have won
Stranger: all time
Stranger: so far
Stranger: 12 people
Stranger: disconnected
Stranger: it was fun
You: LOL, it’s fun doing that on omegle, isn’t it?
Stranger: you are a evil bastard
Stranger: you not leave
Stranger: DAM you
Stranger: DAM you
You: I like to say weird things.
Stranger: call you a stalker
You: To creepy people out. I don’t insult people. It’s just not my thing.
You: *creep
Stranger: why not
Stranger: its not way i talk in real life
Stranger: but i enjoy
Stranger: it
Stranger: on internet
Stranger: its funny
You: Eh, it’s not worth it.
Stranger: ya it is
Stranger: they log off
Stranger: i lol
Stranger: rofl
Stranger: on carpet
Stranger: until i get burned face
You: It’s more fun creeping people out, to me.
Stranger: carpet burns
Stranger: rolling
Stranger: how do i creep out
Stranger: i know now
Stranger: gonna hang my self
Stranger: you dont click
Stranger: disconnect
Stranger: right now
Stranger: pluss bet you would watch
Stranger: evil cunt
Stranger: bet you provide rope
You: I like to say “i need help killing my goldfish”.
Stranger: thanks
You: And no, I don’t like people dying. I don’t know you, in fact I’ll probably forget about you and this whole conversation in a few decades.
Stranger: i use that
Stranger: next person
Stranger: lol
You: So I don’t wish death on you.
Stranger: jesus
Stranger: decades
Stranger: man
Stranger: you remember me
Stranger: that long
Stranger: aahahhaha
You: Yeah, I have a good memory.
Stranger: same
Stranger: i remember this to
Stranger: lol
Stranger: for at least
Stranger: 5 years
You: Same here.
Stranger: lol
Stranger: how much can you store in brain
Stranger: in numbers
Stranger: nearly about 36
You: I don’t know.
Stranger: try it
Stranger: fun
Stranger: lol
Stranger: try remember phone numbers
Stranger: remember lots of em
Stranger: go to yellow pages
Stranger: nowwwwwwww
Stranger: RUShses
You: Oh geez, I can’t do that. LOL.
Stranger: must stare at it
Stranger: for at least
Stranger: 2 hours
Stranger: lolllllllll
You: lol
Stranger: people say WTF you doing
Stranger: i say staring
Stranger: at yellow pages
You: Must. Memorize. Phone numbers.
Stranger: ya
Stranger: many as possible
Stranger: then go prank calling
Stranger: woot woot
You: Prank calling is fun.
You: lol.
Stranger: hi am your doctor
Stranger: your last check up says
Stranger: you got cancer
Stranger: hangs up
Stranger: or hi am doctor lang hong
Stranger: LOl
Stranger: lolllllllllll
You: I think there’s a guy who prank calls telemarketers. He even released a CD with a bunch of recordings where he messed with some telemarketers.
Stranger: best hi am DR prankster
Stranger: say it realy fast
You: lol
Stranger: it does not sound like
Stranger: prankster
Stranger: if you say it fast
You: lol!
Stranger: hi this is dr prankster on the phone am afraid your wife has died
Stranger: jokeeeee
Stranger: HANGS up
Stranger: lollll
You: Well, I guess I should disconnect (you’ll probably be happy). I’ll be honest: you annoyed me, but didn’t make me actually angry. Your insults WERE pathetic, but I think you did that on purpose. Anyway, I’ll see you… well, never again, and I’ll keep this conversation saved somewhere. Farewell.
You have disconnected.
October 2nd, 2009 at 9:54 am
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: 17/m looking for horny 16/f’
You: dumbass
You: i’m a horny 17/f
Stranger: aw
You: oh well
Stranger: lol
You: hope you find what you’re looking for though
You: i’ll go be horny with some guy who appreciates me
Stranger: lol
Stranger: sorryT_T
Stranger: epic fail on my part=/
You: totally…see ya
October 2nd, 2009 at 3:19 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: u a m or f
You: i have tits and a dick
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
October 7th, 2009 at 7:31 am
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi!
You: What is your name?
Stranger: adrian
You: Is your name not Bruce?
You: Do you mind if I call you Bruce?
Stranger: no
Stranger: from?
You: Are you from Australia, Bruce?
Stranger: no
You: Do you mind if i pretend that you’re from Australia?
Stranger: ok
You: What do you think of the sheep down there?
Stranger: it just alright
You: Don’t tell me you prefer New Zealand sheep!
Stranger: i prefer NZ sheep
You: Blasphemous! I heard that NZ sheep are fucked twice as often as Australian sheep. Is that true?
Stranger: no i think its indonesian sheep
You: Is your family from Indonesia, Australian Bruce?
Stranger: yes
You: Are they religious?
Stranger: very
You: Would they be upset if they knew you were chatting to a middle aged balding gay athiest with a fetish for Australians named Bruce, while you’re pretending to be called Bruce and be Australian?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
October 20th, 2009 at 6:36 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heyhey
You: hello
Stranger: asl?
You: 19/f/usa
Stranger: hmm name?
You: ash
Stranger: so where in the usa are u from ash?
You: kentucky
Stranger: coolcool
You: what about you?
Stranger: 20 m san diegoo
You: oh cool
You: what sort of things do you like to do?
Stranger: umm surf snowboard go out with friendss hbu?
You: travel and meet new people
You: i’m into wild animals too
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: where hav u traveled too
You: farthest is japan, but just about every state. i have family in sacramento so i’ve been near you
Stranger: hmm thts cool
You: so are we going to beat around the bush about this?
Stranger: haha
You: what do you really want to do?
Stranger: why u got something in mind lol
You: i think you know
You: do you?
Stranger: i think i do
Stranger: hmm
You: do you want to start?
Stranger: well first wht do u look like
Stranger: im a vidual person
Stranger: visual*
You: i have auburn hair, 5’9”, about 125 pounds. kinda freckly face. but don’t let that fool you. i’m tough
You:
Stranger: hmmm sounds cute
Stranger: eye color
You: brown
Stranger: fuck it..u got pics lol?
You: nah, not into the whole internet thing big.
Stranger: haha
You: so, what are you packing?
Stranger: 8 wonderful inches of pleasure bahahahaha
You: I choose my Pikachu to play against your 8 inches of pleasure! It’s powerful Thunderbolt completely destroys it. You recollect your fainted inches and look up at me. With a sudden dawning you realize who I am. And you will always remember the day you were best by….ASH KETCHUM! ***victory sign***
You: I now have all the badges! w00t!
You: Elite Four, here I come!
Stranger: whoa
Stranger: epic
You: want to join me on my travels?
Stranger: hmm naw im good
You: i’m sure misty will let your 8 inches of pleasure win
You: her squirtle is weak.
You: but HOT, if ya know what I’m saying
You: ……hello?
You: damnit. didn’t even get my badge from him….
You have disconnected.
October 22nd, 2009 at 3:24 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: 16 m usa… pics 4 pics?
You: OMG YES
Stranger: asl??
You: heyy hun
You: ohh
You: wats asl
Stranger: what ur Age
You: hehehe is that like age/sex/location
Stranger: yea….ahaha
You: haha duh<33
You: k
You: 41/m/canada
You: asl?
Stranger: ur a dude?
You: yup
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
October 24th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi!
Stranger: hi,,
Stranger: can u tell me ur asl??
You: I suppose! But you’ll disconnect.
Stranger: u are a man???
Stranger: right??
Stranger: hahhahaa,,
You: I’m 86 years old.
Stranger: doesnt matter to me,,
Stranger: im just looking for a new friend,,
Stranger: hahaha,,,
You: Can you tell me your ASL?
Stranger: sure,,
Stranger: then u should tell yours,,
Stranger: after that,,
Stranger: im 22 m jakarta,,
You: I lied. I’m not really 86 years old. I am 92. I’m a female and I like in the United Kingdom.
Stranger: its ok,,
Stranger: we still can be friend,,
Stranger: hahaha,,
You: Sexual friends?
Stranger: i dont think so,,
Stranger: sorry,,
Stranger: just friend,,
You: Grannies need lovin’ too.
Stranger: hahaha,,
Stranger: maybe u can get a love from ur grandson,,
Stranger: hahaha,,
Stranger: different kind of love i mean,,
You: I’m very rich. I can fly you out here and you can be my toy boy. I’ll buy you whatever you want, a new car, new clothes, I really do have alot of money.
You: And when I die which will be soon probably I’ll leave my fortune to you because my son is a little bastard!
Stranger: glad to hear that,, but im not interested,,
Stranger: hahahah,,
Stranger: sorry,,
You: I’m disappointed, my young little stud.
Stranger: do u still interested in a normal chat??
Stranger: hahaha,,
Stranger: sorry to hear that,,
You: Okay, let’s relate to each other in a more casual manner.
Stranger: sure,,
Stranger: why not,,
You: I live in a giant mansion and I’m very lonely except for my servants. Sometimes I go out for tea but not very often. Maybe once a week.
You: My husband died many years ago because I stabbed him in the neck. He’s still buried behind a wall I’m not sure which one.
Stranger: sure u have a grandson right??
Stranger: wow,,
You: Oh yes, somewhere. I never see my family.
Stranger: u such a cold blooded killer huh??
Stranger: hahaha,,
You: Oh dear! Oh dear me! Ha ha ha!
You: No no, it wasn’t like that.
Stranger: is he cheating on u??
You: Not anymore! Ha ha ha!
Stranger: so u have to kill him,,
Stranger: hahaha,
You: You have no idea, young man! In my day you had to kill to survive.
Stranger: Oo,,
You: It was a terrible time. Most old people don’t like to talk about it because it was so bad.
Stranger: Oo,,
Stranger: well,,
Stranger: human are more than animal,,
Stranger: including in their manner,,,
Stranger: they can kill their own relatives if they need to,,
You: When I was in my 20s I accidently got pregnant and we were so poor and didn’t have food so I had to drown my baby in the lake. It was really hard to do. But after about 10 times doing that it got easier.
You: We didn’t have “protection” back then, you see.
Stranger: i see,,
You: Yes, I think I’ve drowned nearly 20 babies in my time. Most of them were mine.
You: I actually had quite a good business doing it for a while, some mothers couldn’t stand to do it to their own children.
You: Madame P. Beaumonts Baby Drowning Service! That was what my business was called.
Stranger: i dont think u want to find a friend,, maybe i will be looking for someone else,, bye grannie,,, hahahah,,
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
October 27th, 2009 at 10:20 pm
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hey
You: Sup yo
Stranger: from
?
Stranger: im asian
You: Im a jew
You: From NYC
You: Titty sprinkles
Stranger: tell me
Stranger: whats a jew?
You: A jew
Stranger: ive been hearing all these jokes about them
You: Jewish
You: A religion
Stranger: but never really understood what all the hoo hah about
Stranger: go on
Stranger: i know that much
You: From israel
Stranger: ok
Stranger: so why the hate against them?
You: The origin of the Jews is traditionally dated to around the second millennium BCE to the patriarchs, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.[9] The Merneptah Stele, dated to 1200 BCE, is one of the earliest archaeological records of the Jewish people in the Land of Israel,[10] where Judaism, the first monotheistic religion,[11] developed over a period of thousands of years. According to Biblical accounts, the Jews enjoyed periods of self-determination first under the Biblical judges from Othniel Ben Kenaz through Samson, then circa 1000 BCE King David established Jerusalem as the capital of the United Kingdom of Israel and Judah, also known as the United Monarchy, and from there ruled the Twelve Tribes of Israel.[12]
Elaborated reconstruction of the Temple of Solomon based on the Biblical descriptionIn 970 BCE, David’s son Solomon became king of Israel.[13] Within a decade, Solomon began to build the Holy Temple known as the First Temple. Upon Solomon’s death (c. 930 BCE), the ten northern tribes split off to form the Kingdom of Israel.[14] In 722 BCE the Assyrians conquered the Kingdom of Israel and exiled its Jews, starting a Jewish diaspora.[15] At a time of limited mobility and travel, Jews became some of the first and most visible immigrants.
The First Temple period ended around 586 BCE as the Babylonians conquered the Kingdom of Judah and destroyed the Jewish Temple.[16] In 538 BCE, after fifty years of Babylonian captivity, Persian King Cyrus the Great permitted the Jews to return to rebuild Jerusalem and the holy temple. Construction of the Second Temple was completed in 516 BCE during the reign of Darius the Great seventy years after the destruction of the First Temple.[17][18] When Alexander the Great conquered the Persian Empire, the Land of Israel fell under Hellenistic Greek control, eventually falling to the Ptolemaic dynasty who lost it to the Seleucids. The Seleucid attempt to recast Jerusalem as a Hellenized polis came to a head in 168 BCE with the successful Maccabean revolt of Mattathias the High Priest and his five sons against Antiochus Epiphanes, and their establishment of the Hasmonean Kingdom in 152 BCE with Jerusalem again as its capital.[19] The Hasmonean Kingdom lasted over one hundred years, but then as Rome became stronger it installed Herod as a Jewish client king. The Herodian Kingdom also lasted over a hundred years.[20] Defeats suffered by the Jews in the First revolt in 70 CE, the first of the Jewish–Roman Wars, and the Bar Kokhba revolt in 135 CE notably contributed to the numbers and geography of the diaspora population. Significant numbers of Jews in the Land of Israel left, were expelled or sold into slavery throughout the Roman Empire.[21] Since then, Jews have lived in most countries of the world, primarily in Europe, the wider Middle East and later, North America. In the various countries in which they have lived, the Jews have survived periods of discrimination, oppression, poverty, and even genocide (see: Antisemitism, The Holocaust). There have also been periods of cultural, economic, and individual prosperity in various locations; these include Islamic Spain and Portugal, Germany and Poland during Haskalah, and in the traditionally liberal or constitutional democracies of the United Kingdom, the United States and Australia, amongst others.[22]
The Hebrew noun “Yehudi” (plural Yehudim) originally referred to the tribe of Judah.[23] Later, when the Northern Kingdom of Israel split from the Southern Kingdom of Israel, the Southern Kingdom of Israel began to refer to itself by the name of its predominant tribe, or as the Kingdom of Judah.[24] The term originally referred to the people of the southern kingdom, although the term B’nei Yisrael (Israelites) was still used for both groups. After the Assyrians conquered the northern kingdom leaving the southern kingdom as the only Israelite state, the word Yehudim gradually came to refer to the Jewish people as a whole, rather than those specifically from the tribe or Kingdom of Judah. The English word Jew is ultimately derived from Yehudi (see Etymology). Its first use in the Tanakh (Hebrew Bible) to refer to the Jewish people as a whole is in the Book of Esther.[25]
You: A Jew (Hebrew: יְהוּדִי, Yehudi (sg.); יְהוּדִים, Yehudim (pl.); Ladino: ג׳ודיו, Djudio (sg.); ג׳ודיוס, Djudios (pl.); Yiddish: יִיד, Yid (sg.); יִידן, Yidn (pl.))[3] is a member of the Jewish people, an ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. The Jewish ethnicity, nationality, and religion are strongly interrelated, as Judaism is the traditional faith of the Jewish nation.[4][5][6] Converts to Judaism have been included among Jews throughout the millennia.
In Jewish tradition, Jewish ancestry is traced to the Biblical patriarchs Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the second millennium BCE. The Jews enjoyed two periods of political autonomy in their national homeland, the Land of Israel, during ancient history. The first era spanned from 1350 to 586 BCE, and encompassed the periods of the Judges, the United Monarchy, and the Divided Monarchy of the Kingdoms of Israel and Judah, ending with the destruction of the First Temple. The second era was the period of the Hasmonean Kingdom spanning from 140 to 37 BCE. Since the destruction of the First Temple, the diaspora has been the home of most of the world’s Jews.[7] Except in the modern State of Israel, established in 1948, Jews are a minority in every country in which they live and they have frequently experienced persecution throughout history, resulting in a population that fluctuated both in numbers and distribution over the centuries.
According to the Jewish Agency, as of 2007 there were 13.2 million Jews worldwide, 5.4 million of whom lived in Israel, 5.3 million in the United States, and the remainder distributed in communities of varying sizes around the world; this represents 0.2% of the current estimated world population.[1] These numbers include all those who consider themselves Jews whether or not affiliated with a Jewish organization.[8] The total world Jewish population, however, is difficult to measure. In addition to halakhic considerations, there are secular, political, and ancestral identification factors in defining who is a Jew that increase the figure considerably.[8]
You: Care to read?
You: Judaism shares some of the characteristics of a nation, an ethnicity, a religion, and a culture, making the definition of who is a Jew vary slightly depending on whether a religious or national approach to identity is used.[28] Generally, in modern secular usage, Jews include three groups: people who were born to a Jewish family regardless of whether or not they follow the religion, those who have some Jewish ancestral background or lineage (sometimes including those who do not have strictly matrilineal descent), and people without any Jewish ancestral background or lineage who have formally converted to Judaism and therefore are followers of the religion.[29] At times conversion has accounted for a substantial part of Jewish population growth. In the first century of the Christian era, for example, the population more than doubled, from 4 to 8–10 million within the confines of the Roman Empire, in good part as a result of a wave of conversion.[30]
Historical definitions of Jewish identity have traditionally been based on halakhic definitions of matrilineal descent, and halakhic conversions. Historical definitions of who is a Jew date back to the codification of the oral tradition into the Babylonian Talmud. Interpretations of sections of the Tanakh, such as Deuteronomy 7:1-5, by learned Jewish sages, are used as a warning against intermarriage between Jews and non-Jews because “[the non-Jewish male spouse] will cause your child to turn away from Me and they will worship the gods of others.” Leviticus 24:10 says that the son in a marriage between a Hebrew woman and an Egyptian man is “of the community of Israel.” This contrasts with Ezra 10:2-3, where Israelites returning from Babylon vow to put aside their gentile wives and their children.[31][32] Since the Haskalah, these halakhic interpretations of Jewish identity have been challenged.[33
You: Do you understand?
Stranger: im reading
Stranger: gimme a min
You: Within the world's Jewish population there are distinct ethnic divisions, most of which are primarily the result of geographic branching from an originating Israelite population, and subsequent independent evolutions. An array of Jewish communities were established by Jewish settlers in various places around the Old World, often at great distances from one another resulting in effective and often long-term isolation from each other. During the millennia of the Jewish diaspora the communities would develop under the influence of their local environments; political, cultural, natural, and populational. Today, manifestation of these differences among the Jews can be observed in Jewish cultural expressions of each community, including Jewish linguistic diversity, culinary preferences, liturgical practices, religious interpretations, as well as degrees and sources of genetic admixture.[34]
Jews are often identified as belonging to one of two major groups: the Ashkenazim, or “Germans” (Ashkenaz meaning “Germany” in Medieval Hebrew, denoting their Central European base), and the Sephardim, or “Spaniards” (Sefarad meaning “Spain” or “Iberia” in Hebrew, denoting their Spanish and Portuguese base). The Mizrahim, or “Easterners” (Mizrach being “East” in Hebrew), that is, the diverse collection of Middle Eastern and North African Jews, constitute a third major group, although they are sometimes termed Sephardi for liturgical reasons.[35]
Smaller groups include, but are not restricted to, Indian Jews such as the Bene Israel, Bnei Menashe, Cochin Jews, and Bene Ephraim; the Romaniotes of Greece; the Italian Jews (“Italkim” or “Bené Roma”); the Teimanim from Yemen and Oman; various African Jews, including most numerously the Beta Israel of Ethiopia; and Chinese Jews, most notably the Kaifeng Jews, as well as various other distinct but now almost extinct communities.[36]
The divisions between all these groups are approximate and their boundaries are not always clear. The Mizrahim for example, are a heterogeneous collection of North African, Central Asian, Caucasian, and Middle Eastern Jewish communities that are often as unrelated to each other as they are to any of the earlier mentioned Jewish groups. In modern usage, however, the Mizrahim are sometimes termed Sephardi due to similar styles of liturgy, despite independent development from Sephardim proper. Thus, among Mizrahim there are Iraqi Jews, Egyptian Jews, Berber Jews, Lebanese Jews, Kurdish Jews, Libyan Jews, Syrian Jews, Bukharian Jews, Mountain Jews, Georgian Jews, and various others. The Teimanim from Yemen and Oman are sometimes included, although their style of liturgy is unique and they differ in respect to the admixture found among them to that found in Mizrahim. In addition, there is a differentiation made between Sephardi migrants who established themselves in the Middle East and North Africa after the expulsion of the Jews from Spain and Portugal in the 1490s and the pre-existing Jewish communities in those regions.[36]
Despite this diversity, Ashkenazi Jews represent the bulk of modern Jewry, with at least 70% of Jews worldwide (and up to 90% prior to World War II and the Holocaust). As a result of their emigration from Europe, Ashkenazim also represent the overwhelming majority of Jews in the New World continents, in countries such as the United States, Canada, Argentina, Australia, and Brazil. In France, emigration of Mizrahim from North Africa has led them to outnumber the Ashkenazim and Sephardim.[37] Only in Israel is the Jewish population representative of all groups, a melting pot independent of each group’s proportion within the overall world Jewish population.[38]
You: Judaism guides its adherents in both practice and belief, and has been called not only a religion, but also a “way of life,”[92] which has made drawing a clear distinction between Judaism, Jewish culture, and Jewish identity rather difficult. Throughout history, in eras and places as diverse as the ancient Hellenic world,[93] in Europe before and after The Age of Enlightenment (see Haskalah),[94] in Islamic Spain and Portugal,[95] in North Africa and the Middle East,[95] India,[96] and China,[97] or the contemporary United States[98] and Israel,[99] cultural phenomena have developed that are in some sense characteristically Jewish without being at all specifically religious. Some factors in this come from within Judaism, others from the interaction of Jews or specific communities of Jews with their surroundings, others from the inner social and cultural dynamics of the community, as opposed to from the religion itself. This phenomenon has led to considerably different Jewish cultures unique to their own communities, each as authentically Jewish as the next.[100]
You: Hahahahaha overwhelmed?
Stranger: quite
Stranger: lol
Stranger: ive read each and every paragrasph
Stranger: *paragraph
Stranger: and i must say
Stranger: its a rather long read
Stranger: and its 1248 am over here
Stranger: im finding it quite hard to take in facts
You: Hmmm you should probably get to sleep…
You: And wake up a jew!!!!
Stranger: lol
Stranger: i still dont understand the jokes against them though
You: Me neither
Stranger: seems like many people are not happy of jews
Stranger: its a sad world when people have no tolerance for others’ believes
You: Yes it is….
You: Get to sleep…Good night….
Stranger: alright
Stranger: night
Stranger: thanks for your information
Stranger: bye
You: Bye
You have disconnected.
November 2nd, 2009 at 2:47 pm
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: You remind me of the babe.
You: what babe?
Stranger: The babe with the power.
You: what power?
Stranger: The power of voodoo.
You: Who do?
Stranger: You do.
You: Do what?
Stranger: Remind me of the babe.
You: I’m so glad we sorted that out.
Stranger: Me too.
November 7th, 2009 at 4:40 pm
Stranger: Hey.
Stranger: Asl
You: Hello
You: 32 m netherlands
You: and you?
Stranger: You horny?
Stranger: I’m 23, female from the US
You: yes
Stranger: I’m fuckin horny too, you married?
You: yes but my wife will never know
Stranger: I’m married to, my husbands fuckin lame.
Stranger: So, how bigs your dick?
You: 25cm
Stranger: hmm whats thats in inches?
You: i dont know. large though
Stranger: Alright good, probably bigger than my husbands anyways.
Stranger: And he can hardly last 2 minutes.
You: i last all night baby
Stranger: Good :]
Stranger: How do you like your women?
You: i like the large women
Stranger: I’m not fat, but I’m not thin either.
Stranger: I got giant tits though, and quite a nice butt.
You: a little cushion for the pushin as i always say
Stranger: You got kids?
You: oh yes
Stranger: Where are they?
You: the hell if i know… i send them to the store hours ago and they still haven’t returned
Stranger: So you’re okay to jack off then?
Stranger: Cuz i want you rubbin that big dick to me baby.
You: yeah baby.. do you mind if the goats are watching?
Stranger: The goats?
Stranger: Nah, not at all. Let them watch.
You: wonderful. do you enjoy sex with the goats?
Stranger: No.
You: Oooh this might be a feal breaker.
Stranger: So you’re not gonna fuck me then?
You: dea*
Stranger: Aww..
You: no
Stranger: I hate you 4chan.
You: yu must have sex with the goat
Stranger: You’re killing all my best trolls.
Stranger: Fuckin nigger paradise over there.
You: i do not understand
Stranger: I don’t understand dick.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
November 11th, 2009 at 9:00 am
Omegle conversation log2009-11-03
_
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: BOO
Stranger: halloween had past
Stranger: asl pls
Stranger: ?
You: no its still halloween.
Stranger: asl pls?
You: why so desperate?
Stranger: not desperate
Stranger: just in a rush
Stranger: writing a paper which is dfue tomorrow
You: so why ur on omegle then
Stranger: and it is already 4.24am
Stranger: i dunno
You: get your ass and work on that paper
Stranger: ah thanks mom
You: np child
Stranger: lately i dont wanna do any work
Stranger: you go to college?
You: ye
You: im studying how microwaves behave
Stranger: is this a BA program?
You: ?
You: ba program?
Stranger: bachelors? undergrad?
You: ah, pos grad study
Stranger: where?
You: in school
Stranger: wow
Stranger: this is interesting
You: yea. the study of microwaves and their beheaveurs is really intresting
Stranger: i can imagine…
Stranger: anyway
Stranger: so you wanna real talk eh?
Stranger: deep conversation?
You: so, open u subject
You: a*
Stranger: i dunno
Stranger: you called me desperate
You: yea i know
You: and i still think you are
You: because your reading this useless conversation for like 5 mins now
Stranger: thank you
Stranger: well you too
Stranger: sometimes you just need that moment of emptiness
You: just got filled up last night?
Stranger: i told you
Stranger: i wa writing a paper on karl polanyi
You: that gay guy?
Stranger: in case if you are interested about the subject
Stranger: keynes was gay
Stranger: i dunno about polanyi
You: yea all of them are gay
Stranger: good generalization
You: over wonderd why its called “the great transformation”
Stranger: haha
Stranger: transformation of the market
You: they want you to beleive that
Stranger: transforming into facism
You: they are all just tranny’s
Stranger: eq. nazi germany, facist italy, ussr, etc
Stranger: yeah, just like that..
Stranger: and he talks about double movement
You: double movement in his ass yeah
Stranger: where self regulating market has to run with this invisible hand theory but in reality -according to this gay guy- the state intervention is inevitable
You: damn that sentece is to long too read
Stranger: seriously?
You: yea
Stranger: when you said microwaves i thought the scientific waves or something
Stranger: but now i have doubt on that
You: no its are microwaves
Stranger: may be you just watch kitchen microwaves huh?
You: to heaten your food
You: yea im studying the behave of them
Stranger: kitchen microwaves?
You: yea
Stranger: no ultraviolet? gamma rays? radio waves?
You: no
Stranger: you are a weirdo
Stranger: when was the last time you had sex?
You: lol, actually im having it atm
Stranger: aa
You: never did that? having sex with your laptop on her back?
Stranger: well i am having amind-fuck if this is what you r talking about
You: no just plain sex
Stranger: tell her i said hi
You: meh i doesnt want she stops
Stranger: nice english
You: yea, english not part of my study
You: is*
Stranger: mean either
Stranger: so which fucking country are u from?
You: im from Holland where the fuck u from ?
Stranger: well i am studying in ny right now
Stranger: been here for a while
Stranger: actually i am from that county where all those bloddy turks come from
You: so ur from china?
Stranger: well you went way back
You: russia then
Stranger: nope man
Stranger: i am from turkey
Stranger: i meant bloody turks
You: ur froman animal?
You: from an*
Stranger: as i would think they are not that liked over in europe
You: meh whe dont each much turkeys
Stranger: turkei
Stranger: is that how you write in dutch
Stranger: ?
You: nope
You: that means your gay
Stranger: your dady is gay
You: i dont have one
You: Sisadzijo
You: Jebo ti konj trudnu sestru na majcinom grobu dok ti otac retardiran gleda iz invalidskihkolica.
Stranger: satisfying your own ego?
You: nope
You: just wish u the best
Stranger: yes i will buy that
You: lol you dont wanna know what it is in english
Stranger: i can easily
You: A horse fucks your pregnant sister on your moms grave as your retarded dad is watching from he’s wheelchair.
Stranger: literally?
You: yea
Stranger: thats a good literacy there
Stranger: you high?
You: no
Stranger: got some pot in your place?
You: no
Stranger: ahhh
Stranger: come on
Stranger: i am not an agent
Stranger: dont u smoke
You: its legal here
Stranger: i know
Stranger: but isnt it illegal to sell or smth?
You: to sell yes.. to grow only a certain amount
Stranger: good
Stranger: you grow?
You: no
Stranger: you are not gay are you
Stranger: not that i dont support gays
You: hmm, why do u ask ?
Stranger: i am curious why would you keep talking to another dude on a website where everybody just tries to talk about pussies and cocks?
You: same for u?
Stranger: you are challening
Stranger: you may sound stupid but you are not stupid
Stranger: this is an early judgement tho
You: im just wondering how long ur gonna keep this useless converstation going
Stranger: i was wondering the same thing
Stranger: i have couple more pages to write and the sun will be up soon
You: its up here
You: i can tell u how its like
You: and the sun doesnt go up
Stranger: i take astronomy this semester
Stranger: i should have known that
Stranger: dams
Stranger: damn
You: fail
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: dont you have any work or something
You: got some spare time. while studying my new microwave
Stranger: or you are a 56 years old dude, who is trying to jerk off while watching porn and chatting at the same time?
You: maybe who knows
Stranger: i guess i ll never know
You: ok good anwser, round 2 ding
Stranger: what this is a battle
Stranger: a fight?
Stranger: a race?
Stranger: competition?
Stranger: what is that?
You: click alt+f4 then enter and you win
Stranger: what do i win?
You: a free disco
Stranger: money? fame? status?
Stranger: ah disco
You: yea
Stranger: fuck discos
Stranger: do you go to disco
You: that why u are here so long
You: u hate disconnects
Stranger: no i am here coz you ask questions
You: what was the last question i asked b4 this one?
Stranger: hmm why do u ask
You: so, ur asking the questions here
Stranger: no that was the question you asked before
You: …
You: are u really that stupid or u just making a special effort today?
Stranger: well we are all stupid
Stranger: and how come you see yourself over me
Stranger: oh, stopped typing
You: lyea my keyboard broke
Stranger: didnt know what to say
Stranger: yea yea good excuse
You: thanks
Stranger: what are you gonna be when you become something?
You: something ofc
Stranger: ofc ?
You: of course
Stranger: ok
Stranger: i am bored
Stranger: i still think you are gay
You: yea didnt u have a paper to finish?
Stranger: but it is cool
You: u can think whatever u like
Stranger: yes i do have a paper to finish
Stranger: probably not gonna do it
You: prob u should
Stranger: yo
Stranger: really
Stranger: this is lil bit weird
You: no u are just weird
Stranger: i like the discussion
You: what one?
Stranger: but who da hell are you
Stranger: i am just curious
You: im The Chicken Man
Stranger: yesss
You: yesss what?
Stranger: but can there be a chicken man
Stranger: a chicken
Stranger: a man
Stranger: are you gay?
You: hmm,, let me anwser that question with an other question.. why do the chicken cross the road
Stranger: ?
Stranger: didnt get it
Stranger: -remember i am stupid
You: well think and you will get the awnser
Stranger: is this a trivia ?
You: its just a damn question
Stranger: what did the snowman tell to the other snowman?
You: notinh they cant talk
Stranger: you can talk
Stranger: why cant they talk
You: they have no brains
You: and such
Stranger: well that wasnt the expected answer
You: if what did you expect?
Stranger: something dumb actually
Stranger: really trying to figure out
Stranger: and yes the snowman tells something
Stranger: but
Stranger: did you got hit by a car?
You: lol
Stranger: funny?
You: yea
You: and no i did not hit a car
You: maybe the car hit me i dont know that
Stranger: just tell me who da fcuk are you
Stranger: and i will go
You: noo
Stranger: you are free to lie
You: i want u to stay
You: and as i said. i am The Chicken Man
Stranger: ooo, getting intimate here
Stranger: look who is desperate now
You: im not
Stranger: yes you are
You: i just dont want u to finish ur paper
Stranger: you can deny it but it is there
You: if i was desperatie i would say, o goddd pleaasasee stayy
You: but im not saying that
Stranger: you dont need to prove it to me
Stranger: it is cool
You: i think i do because u think i am
Stranger: didnt you just say i can think anything i want to think about you
You: yea you can think it but that does not mean its treu
You: true*
Stranger: see you are contradicting yourself
Stranger: well you are the one who is trying to hide the truth about him/herself
You: ohh well, mister im like an open book. this is a talk to stranger chat for an resaon
You: reason*
Stranger: you didnt oppose that much when i said you are gay
You: i did give u an anwser
Stranger: no you didnt
You: yea, if you anwsered the question rightly u are getting the anwser to your sentece above that one
You: this isnt really a chat anymore, just a competition who can hold out the longest
Stranger: no
Stranger: i am not buying that
You: doesnt need to its free
Stranger: you are grad student
You: yep in a degree of microwaves
Stranger: you are holding on to that title pretty strong
You: maybe cuz its true?
You: or maybe not
Stranger: uh, cant care for less -you know chat with a stranger
You: u want to know who the fuck i am
Stranger: not anymore
You: good
Stranger: you are lame
You: can be,,
You: or not?
Stranger: i think you dont have any friends
You: you can think what ever u want to think
Stranger: desperate, locked up in a college dorm
Stranger: lonely
You: so in your head u still want to find out what i am
Stranger: eating patoto chips
Stranger: would be cool eh
Stranger: may be you are girl witth a vagina
You: You: u want to know who the fuck i am
Stranger: not anymore
Stranger: and i come to amsterdam
Stranger: and e fuck
Stranger: then we marry
Stranger: have kids
Stranger: and die
You: u will die before we even meet
You: or not?
Stranger: we met i tink almost an hour ago
You: and you even dont know my name
Stranger: names are given by our parents
You: u would really suck in speeddating
Stranger: i dont need speeddating
Stranger: is that what do you do
You: maybe
Stranger: well you would suck as well
You: maybe
Stranger: may be may be
Stranger: everything is maybe
You: yea. maybe u wanna leave
Stranger: what are you gaining out of this
You: everything has a change of happening
You: nothing
Stranger: you know just signing of would be a bitch move
Stranger: you can do it
Stranger: then you will say
Stranger: god, what a waste of time
You: nope,
Stranger: why>
You: but it has a chance to happen
You: like everything has
Stranger: yea
Stranger: you trying to sound smart?
You: no
Stranger: but you just did
You: quoting an other guy isnt smart
Stranger: actually have been trying
Stranger: i think you like this conversation
You: i just want to u disconnect b4 me
Stranger: may be you are fat, and the society doesnt accept you anymore
You: maybe
Stranger: the thing is
Stranger: if i sign off
Stranger: then whole this thing will be nothing but a waste
You: so?
Stranger: waste is not goodf
You: toxic waste?
Stranger: FUCK
Stranger: waste is not good
Stranger: and i mean it would be a waste of time
Stranger: DO YOU GET WHAT I AM SAYING
Stranger: waste of time
Stranger: time man,
Stranger: time
Stranger: it will never come back
You: lies
Stranger: it is gone…
Stranger: flies
You: will a fly without wings called a walk ?
You: you have to get up and go to school in a couple of hours
Stranger: do u care
You: maybe
Stranger: 50%
You: on what?
Stranger: discount
You: so i get 50% on discount?
Stranger: if you buy one pair of jeans the second one os 50% off
You: i will buy the 2nd pair only
Stranger: then the first one will be 50% off
You: then i will buy the first one and the 2nd because i both got 50%
Stranger: yey
Stranger: awesome
Stranger: sweet
Stranger: super
You: wait if i go afk for 10 min will u disconnect?
Stranger: afk?
You: away from keyboard
Stranger: why?
You: u get u disconnect
You: to*
Stranger: is this a test
Stranger: or do you really need to pie
You: no im just not talking to u in 10 mins then
Stranger: may be take a dump
Stranger: of course i will leave
You: nice
You: starting now
Stranger: ok
Stranger: you are one of the strangest people i have ever met online
Stranger: -this should make you feel good about yourself
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: hahahahahaha
Stranger: you couldnt wait ten min
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: you DA DESPERATE
Stranger: you DA LOSER
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: yesss
Stranger: yess
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: i win the trphy
Stranger: anyway
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: i looked if i did have any email account without my name on the address
Stranger: couldnt
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: so you just stiing in front of the computer
Stranger: staring at the screen like a dumb
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: but you lost it already man
Stranger: you have been sending these messeages
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: you cant just keep copy pasting them
Stranger: EMAIL CENCORED
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: this is not my name
Stranger: a fake id
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: you can e-mail
Stranger: if you dont
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: after a week
Stranger: i will not check it
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
Stranger: good talking to you
Stranger: thanks for leaving for 10 min
You: this is an automatic away message: atm im traveling trough time and will be back last week
You: hi there im back
Stranger: YOU FUCKED UP MINDED PERSON
You: let me just turn off thic auto message
Stranger: haha
Stranger: but any way
You: u liked it?
Stranger: i left my e-mail address
You: for?
Stranger: so you can keep your bullshitting if you want to
You: nope
Stranger: and satify your ego
Stranger: and show people how smart you are
You: lol just having some fun
Stranger: me too
You: tough u will have disconnected by now?
Stranger: not saying those to offedn you by the way
Stranger: yes darling
Stranger: sweetheart
Stranger: it would have been nice to get close to eachother eh?
You: maybe
Stranger: have some sexy time in amsterdam eh?
You: thats where jews live
Stranger: talk about microwaves together eh?
You: look whos desperate now
Stranger: yes i am very desperate
Stranger: ok this is it
You: i like the movie
Stranger: dude i am benjamin
Stranger: i live on the first floor man
Stranger: bunch a friends have been just online
You: u play games?
Stranger: dude we are cracking up here
Stranger: dude lets go the bar
You: …
Stranger: yo come on
Stranger: i know it is harsh
You: its midday here
Stranger: i will buy the beer for you
You: or not?
Stranger: eh come on
Stranger: we drink beer all day long in germany
Stranger: come on man
You: lol
You: im still having a hangover from last night
Stranger: this is ridiculos
Stranger: i heard you went out with those two girls
Stranger: what were their names?
You: from who
Stranger: fuck
You: i dont know anyone named fuck
Stranger: ok
Stranger: ———-
Stranger: the end
Stranger: i am not a normal person
Stranger: but you are not normal either
You: we all knew that
Stranger: go see a doctor
Stranger: they dont help
Stranger: but you may feel good for some time
You: nope
Stranger: i am not gay
Stranger: from turkey
Stranger: but study in the us
You: and live in germany?
Stranger: these are all true
Stranger: no
Stranger: germany was lie
Stranger: i study global studies
Stranger: and i like to be realistic
You: so ur studying what u are gonna to be studing?
Stranger: i dont even like harry potter or lord of the rings
Stranger: anyway
Stranger: no more talking bullshit
You: lets switch to dipp schit
Stranger: i am straight, white, 21 male
Stranger: i dont hate gays or lesbians
Stranger: i support them
You: lol
Stranger: you sounded interesting
You: im not
You: or am i
Stranger: in case you wanna write
Stranger: you got the e-mail
Stranger: you have a good sense of humor
Stranger: it is 6am here
Stranger: so you can see that i am from the east coast
You: so play eve online or something to pass out time
Stranger: that was a good experience
Stranger: but i will regret it in the morning
Stranger: -which is already morning
Stranger: anything to say ?
You: no
Stranger: ok
Stranger: hadi eyvallah
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
November 26th, 2009 at 6:37 am
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: did you say hi just because the thing told you to?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
But seriously, dude! That thing just forced you to say hi to me!!!
November 26th, 2009 at 6:40 am
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: guy 19 interested in cyber
You: guy 78 also intrested in cyber
Stranger: hahah disgusting lol
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
November 29th, 2009 at 10:05 am
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Greetings
Stranger: what is youy name
Stranger: glad to meet
Stranger: you
You: You may call me V.
You: To whom, might I ask, am I speaking with?
Stranger: jack
Stranger: where are you from
You: Tell me Jack, do you know what day it is?
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: would you mind to tell me pls
You: Remember, remember the 5th of November. The gunpowder, treason, and plot. I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason should ever be forgot.
Stranger: oh,yeah
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: hello,V
You: Today, however, is a day, sadly, no longer remembered.
You: So, I thought we could mark this November the 5th by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat.
Stranger: sorry,i am …
You: Of course, there are those who do not want us to speak.
Stranger: maybe you can tell me where a good place
You: But regardless of what weapons they try to use to effect silence, words will always retain their power. Words are the means to meaning, and for some, the annunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country.
Stranger: whom
You: I, like God, do not play with dice and do not believe in coincidence.
Stranger: i think your thought is torrblely passed
You: Would you prefer a lie or the truth?
Stranger: what the plat works for
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: not
Stranger: why
You: I killed him.
You: You’re upset.
Stranger: yes
Stranger: i lost my temper
You: Violence can be used for good.
You: Justice.
Stranger: i donnot yhink so
Stranger: sorry,do you remerber something
Stranger: very nice
Stranger: like movies or sth
You: I told you, only truth. For 20 years, I sought only this day. Nothing else existed… until I saw you. Then everything changed. I fell in love with you jack. And to think I no longer believed I could.
Stranger: i need to go now,i think you should have to go to a nice place and to have a cup of tea or sth
You: That’s the most beautiful thing you could have ever given me.
Stranger: so goodbye,good luck
You: The time has come for me to meet my maker and to repay him in kind for all that he’s done.
December 4th, 2009 at 9:03 pm
You: Hey fuckwit.
Stranger: fuck u BITCH!
You: Ok then.
You: Fuck me.
Stranger: YOU’RE SO STUPID DUMB GRAZY GO TO HELLL!
You: Grazy?
You: As in grazing?
Stranger: you are such a LOSER!!!!!!
You: Your capital letters are in the wrong places.
Stranger: APA KABAR MACIK???
You: I assume that means: I am a fuckwit.
You: Yes, you are.
Stranger: STUPID DUMB CRAZY GO TO THE HOSPITAL IDIOT!
You: Which hospital?
You: For what reason?
Stranger: LO TUH ORANGNYA FREAK! JADI CWO GTW MALU. BOKEP LAGI! PERGI LO KE RSJ! PERVERT !!!!!!
You: Is your caps lock key broken?
Stranger: ga kok. lo nya aja yg aneh
You: Yes, it would appear so.
You: Completely caps one time, none the next.
You: You really need to get that fixed.
Stranger: terima kasih tapi ini komputer sekolah
You: Yes, your computer is fucked.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
December 6th, 2009 at 7:38 am
tranger: i dont like you. but i love you
Stranger: how cool is that?
You: thats awesome!
You: my life is complete now
Stranger: yeahh
Stranger: i know right!
Stranger: we are such an awesome pair
You: where have you been all my life
You: mind if i call you bruce
Stranger: right behind you
Stranger: why bruce?
Stranger: mind if i call you sarah?
You: seems appropriate
You: yeah sure
You: nice name bruce
Stranger: so ur f huh?
You: was it your grandpas name or something?
You: yeah i am
You: bruce
Stranger: im bruce white
Stranger: yours sarah?
You: im sarah black
Stranger: cool
You: we really are a pair
Stranger: sarah,i have a confession to make..
Stranger: im a girl
You: ok go ahead bruce
Stranger: so that makes us a lesbian pair :O
You: BRUCE!
You: youve failed me
Stranger: im sorry sarah
You: tsk
Stranger: i know
You: im still going to call you bruce
Stranger: im such a bad boyfriend
You: you can wear the pants in this relationship
Stranger: ok cool
Stranger: sarah, i lovee you
Stranger: but i gtg now
Stranger: gonna catch a movie with my other girlfriend
Stranger: im sorry sarah for betraying you
Stranger: you are just not hot enough for me
You: thats ok bruce
You: i know you love me the most out of all your girlfriends
December 18th, 2009 at 10:01 am
The killer elmo conversation made by kesuli.
You: KILLER ELMO KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE… MWAHAHAA….
Stranger: REALLY!????
You: YESS….
Stranger: oh well im gonna hide now
You: YOU CAN HIDE…
You: BUT I CAN FIND YOU.
You: HA HA HAA.
Stranger: sureee…..
You: I HAVE NAVIGATOR
You: MWAHHAHAA!
Stranger: but how is your navigator gonna find me?
You: IT WILL FIND YOU…
Stranger: how?
You: IT KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE.
Stranger: how?
Stranger:
You: IT HAS NANOTECH SYSTEM.
Stranger: why?
You: SO IT WOULD FIND YOU.
Stranger: why does it want to find me?
You: NO.
You: I WANNA FIND YOU.
You: MWAHHAAA!
Stranger: why do you want to find me?
Stranger: i want to find me too.
You: I WANT TO KILL YOU… KILLER ELMO WANTS TO GET YOU…
Stranger: why?
You: BECAUSE I AM REALLY MANIAC.
Stranger: why?
You: I WANT BLOOD… BRAINS… YOUR HEART…
You: AND I WILL EAT THEM.
Stranger: why?
You: I AM HUNGRY. NEED TO KILL!
Stranger: why?
You: IF I DON’T EAT I WILL DIE.
Stranger: CHIPS!!!!
Stranger: are you edward cullen?
You: NO.
You: I AM ELMO.
You: KILLER ELMO.
Stranger: why?
You: WHY YOU ALWAYS SAY WHY?
You: IS IT A HANDICAP
You: ???
Stranger: i dont know!!!! and no…
You: MY NAVIGATOR SAYS YOU HAVE RED ON YOUR SHIRT.
Stranger: nooooo……
Stranger: i dont!!!
You: LIAR.
Stranger: no my shirt is green and gray
You: MY NAVIGATOR CAN ONLY FAIL 0,01 %.
Stranger: well it failed
You: WELL I AM GOING TO YOUR HOUSE..
Stranger: why?
You: WALKING THE STREET…
Stranger: why?
Stranger: WAIT!!!
You: SETS UP A BOMB ON YOUR HOUSE’S WALL…
You: *BEP BEEP BEEP*
Stranger: how are you walking on my street and on the computer??
Stranger: i here no beeps.
You: BECAUSE I AM IN NAVIGATORS INTERNET.
You: ALSO I SET IT OUTSIDE.
You: ITS COUNTING 10…
You: 9
Stranger: ok well where are you now
You: 8
You: 7
You: 6
You: 5
You: 4
You: 3
You: 2
You: 1
You: 1
You: 1
You: 0
You: 1-
You: 2-
You: DAMN
You: 3-
You: 4-
Stranger: damn?
You: SOMETHING HAPPENED.
You: 5-
You: 6-
Stranger: what?
You: undefiened
You: bla blah blah
You: DARN IT.
Stranger: haha you never killed me you failed!!
You: IT FAILED TOO.
Stranger: yess… killer elmo thats funny
You: WELL, I HAVE KNIFE…
You: I AM WALKING INTO YOUR HOUSE…
You: KNOCKING THE DOOR….
Stranger: oh well my dog isnt barking so your not really here!!!!!
Stranger: i hear no knocking
You: I SHOT THE DOG BEFORE HE LOOKED AT ME.
You: WELL, I DIDN’T KNOCK.
You: I BREAKED THE DOOR.
Stranger: oh thats depressing
You: NOW COMING TO YOUR ROOM…
You: MWA HA HA HAA…
Stranger: am i dead yet?
You: ELMO WANTS YOUR BLOOD…
Stranger: AM I DEAD YET!!??
You: OPENING YOUR DOOR REALLY SLOWY………
You: NO.
Stranger: my door is already open
You: WELL I ALREADY OPENED IT.
You: I AM BEHINGYOU…
You: I AM BEHIND YOU…
Stranger: i dont see you
Stranger: are you purple?
You: NO I AM ON THE ROOF.
Stranger: why
Stranger: ?
You: NO I AM ON THE FLOOR.
You: NOW I STAB KNIFE ON YOU”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: MWA HA HA HA HA HA
You: HAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHAHAH
You: NOW I EAT YOUR HEAD FIRST…
Stranger: im not dead i live forever!!!
You: NOW I AM GETTING YOUR HEART OFF YOU…
Stranger: oh no…
You: Wait… DAMN THIS !¤%&%¤wq#%!!!!! *BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP*
You: I KILLED WRONG HUMANOID!
Stranger: hahaahahahaaaaa
You: WELL… KNOW WHAT?
Stranger: WHAT!?
You: WHEN YOU GO TO SLEEP…
You: I WILL KILL YOU SLOWY WITH KNIFE…
You: GOOD BYE…
Stranger: I DONT SLEEP
Stranger: \
You: DIE.
You: DIE.
You: DIE.
You: KILLER ELMO KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE… MWAHAHAA….
You: KILLER ELMO KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE… MWAHAHAA….
You: KILLER ELMO KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE… MWAHAHAA….
You: KILLER ELMO KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE… MWAHAHAA….
You: KILLER ELMO KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE… MWAHAHAA….
Stranger: where do i live?
You: w¤¤&%/&()(=(/()&/r&(
ERROR WAAHHY72Q6AR
You: *zzap*
You: WHAT DID YOU SAY?
Stranger: where do i live?
You: YOU LIVE ON EARTH.
You: WAS I RIGHT
Stranger: where on earth?
Stranger: and yes.
You: HAHA.
You: I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE.
Stranger: WHERE!?
You: WELL. HAE GOOD NIGHT. BYE.
You have disconnected.
December 23rd, 2009 at 3:05 pm
This is my funniest convo so far
Me- You take a left, you take a right whats the first thing in your sight?
Stranger – A weirdo through the computer
lol
December 23rd, 2009 at 3:43 pm
Me – Hi =)
Stranger – WTF IS YOUR PROBLEM?!?!
Me – I’m talking to an idiot apparently
Stranger – YOU HAVE BIG PROBLEMS!!
Me – Yeah I do, its you
Stranger – that rymes
Me – Oh yeah it does, WOW!!!!!!!!
Stranger – I know right now
Me – Nah, I just like agreeing with idiots so I can disagree with then afterwards
Stranger – what ever
Me – Yup
Stranger – FUCK YOU!!!!!! LOSER!! DIE!
Me – You a
fortune teller now?
Stranger – Yes you gonna die tomorrow
Me – I better write my will then
Me – The the loser on Omegle who predicted my unfortunate death, get your grammer checked, go back to school and see you in hell
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
December 30th, 2009 at 3:41 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hi
You: ummmm , do you have a pimply bum ?
Stranger: nooo
Stranger: do you?
You: 0_______o
You: not answering
Stranger: ?
Stranger: asl?
You: well to put it bluntly
You: i dont have an asl
You: as i am a pubic hair , on someones genital’s
You: dont even get me started dude
You: the dangleberries , OH THE DANGLEBERRIES
Stranger: alright, no worries i wont
You: good man/woman
Stranger: they suck, i know
Stranger: woman
You: EW YOU GET DANGLEBERRIES . gosh my genital owner atleast bites them off , jesus woman
Stranger: i know, im just a freak of nature
You: *licks stranger’s earlobe*
Stranger: weird..
You: we pubic hairs always are .. . . .
Stranger: i think i’ll shave you..
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
January 5th, 2010 at 12:42 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: 18 m looking for horny girl to discuss world politics
Stranger: you hung
You: hung?
Stranger: big cock
You: ohh
You:
You: what’s your government like?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
January 7th, 2010 at 4:22 am
You: hello
Stranger: hey, are you random?
You: a bit
Stranger: or just a stranger?
You: both even
Stranger: wow, that’s a pretty scary combination.
You: a most powerful combination
Stranger: indeed. use your powers for good, not evil.
Stranger: unless you’re using your powers to benefit me, then evilness is acceptable.
You: oh but the temptations…………
Stranger: resist them.
Stranger: they will benefit neither of us, so they matter not.
You: so what good deeds should we scheme?
Stranger: meh, good deeds are boring.
Stranger: let’s take over the world instead?
You: “good” is relative
You: hence the scheming
Stranger: gotcha.
Stranger: so, we’re doing a good thing by putting the world in safer hands, right?
You: safe schmaf
You: our hands do
Stranger: hmm… so how are we gonna take over the world, first of all? and i call USA, just sayin.
You: pfft dibs on Europe and japan then
Stranger: Woah, you’re taking continents?
Stranger: unfair, i wanna have switzerland and norway.
You: usa is almost a continent
You: they are in europe no?
Stranger: they are…
Stranger: but you can have canada and mexico.
You: you can have Australia
Stranger: I call russia, then.
You: boom whole continent
You: k
Stranger: mmkay, give me the top half of africa and you can have the rest.
You: dibs on china
Stranger: nah, gimmie all of africa.
You: taking the sahara……….. bold
You: oh really
You: and india
You: i call india
Stranger: fine, fine.
You: so you can have the rest
You: i got tons of people
Stranger: alright, so i can get all islands, minus japan?
You: mmm except easter island and the galapagos
Stranger: Ehh…
Stranger: i still call easter island…
You: halfs?
Stranger: mmkay, works for me.
You: lol that can be world domination headquarters
Stranger: sounds good.
Stranger: meet you there in like 25 years when i’m dictator of the Northern Hemisphere.
You: mmm you realize most if not all of my claims lie in the n hemi?
Stranger: yeah, i do.
Stranger: but if you take over the southern hemisphere, we can just trade.
You: sure whatever every 10 years, spice it up
You: switch every*
You: so what’s the game plan moon laser, redirect asteroids, bio weapon, what?
Stranger: mhm, pretty much.
You: swarms of robots?
Stranger: we’re gonna take the liquid from earthquakes (y’know how it turns into a liquid during the sand), and we’re gonna use that as fuel for The Death Machine.
You: from the moon made from asteroid with lasers
Stranger: so if the people rebel, we’ll just zap them. brilliant.
You: silia powered stuff k
You: silica*
You: need a good name though
Stranger: yeah, but you gotta make some green powered bots for the enviormentalists, y’know?
Stranger: so we’ll just recycle people from those who get in our way…
You: ah cow fart parasitic robots or something?
Stranger: and stick ‘em in the robots.
Stranger: or that works too.
You: cyborg minions, nice
Stranger: yeah, i thought it was a nice touch.
You: or could just nuke the hell outta everything, but the clean up afterward…….
Stranger: yeah…
Stranger: i mean, i really don’t want to waste my time having to rebuild the world, y’know?
You: yeah so much is already made and ok, just needs some tweeks, not a complete reboot
Stranger: yeah, exactly.
Stranger: i mean, except for France.
You: perfect for blowing up?
You: the LHC is already there, perfect detonator
You: though it would fuck up europe, so carpet booming would do
Stranger: or creating a huge bombproof shield around france, and just tossing the nuke through the top.
You: lol booming, bombing*
You: eh the fall out would still get out, besides there is tons of convention stuff left from many of the older wars
Stranger: meh, good point.
Stranger: we could always have robots clear ‘em out.
You: exactly, probably would have anyway, would just be making the pieces more manageable
Stranger: exactly, exactly.
You: so whats a good name for a merciless world domination organization?
You: Razor Bunnies for laughs or an actual kickass name
Stranger: hmmm…
Stranger: i dunno, razor bunnies might not strike fear in the hearts of our opponents like i was hoping.
Stranger: but it doesn’t really matter while they’re being ripped apart by our army of robots, does it?
You: true, just an example, put if it truly did put fear in there hearts they would be much easier for the robots to get if the are in the fetal position pissing themselves
You: they*
Stranger: yeah, but they’ll be pissing themselves after the first wave of robots slaughters 80% of their country’s population.
You: no they will be crazy, AND pissed so you need the sure thing with a kickass name, it is world domination after all, not some one country invasion
You: you can only try to do it once
Stranger: true, true.
Stranger: any suggestions?
You: well there is cthulu or however you spell it, the like most monsterous entity the mind can imagine if i’m not misstaken, though it doesn’t have the primal fear going for it
You: i’m open to anything really, the name will just be right once it is found
Stranger: yeah, and i’m too tired to find it right now.
Stranger: even future rulers of the world need sleep, you know.
You: a little here and there yes but this will be a huge undertaking, a lifetime even, so adequate sleep is a must, i agree
Stranger: yeah… the plan still needs a few things worked out, and this connection is gone forever once you hit the disconnect button, so add me at (OMITTED) on MSN if you ever want to talk again.
Stranger: Nice meeting you.
You: lol yes very enticing conversation Muuhahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
You: good night future overlord
Stranger: night
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
January 8th, 2010 at 8:27 pm
You: hey, its the tooth fairy
Stranger: Hi, I’m the alphabet
You: great!
You: perhaps you can help me?
Stranger: Sure!
You: i’ve kinda misplaced all my teeth, know anyone who runs a chomp shop?
You: ya know
You: jacked teeth?
You: scrap them
You: and sell the parts?
Stranger: Not offhand, sorry
You: ah, thanks eversomuch alphabet!
You: I will B C’ing you later
Stranger: DO NOT MOCK THE ALPHABET
January 10th, 2010 at 6:53 am
Stranger: heyy
You: hey
Stranger: asl?
You: lassie?
Stranger: no
Stranger: im a guy :3
You: right
Stranger: u?
You: pan
Stranger: wanna see my cock?
You: sure
You: do you have any chickens as well?
January 16th, 2010 at 8:05 pm
Stranger: do you like turtles
You: hell yeah i do!
Stranger: wats your opinoin on them having wings
You: i hate them, when i play mario its what i die from 90% of the time.
Stranger: do you think tomatoes are fruits or vegetables
You: fruits.
Stranger: by the way,just jump on top of the turtels and they loos there wings
You: i still die fyi.
You: going up and down and shit.
You: fuck that.
Stranger: your going up and down on turtels,you rapest!!!!!!!!!!!
You: i said i like turtles.
Stranger: wow
Stranger: if you have a game where you can,get a power flower and pressing B can shoot fire,wat game is the one your having problems with
You: mario?
Stranger: specificly,new super mario bros
Stranger: ???
You: what?
Stranger: wat game,the full name
You: i have no clue.
You: you got me.
Stranger: wat platform,ds ,xbox,psp,ps3?
You: ALL OF THEM!
Stranger: all games!
You: yes?
Stranger: wow,i ges youl have to wing it,or wait til the turtel moves away and run
You: are you in my head?
Stranger: yes,every thing in the world is a figment of your imagination,i dont exist,your birthday is a lie,it is all a dream and it is time for you to wake up
You: is this real life?
Stranger: no
You: is this going to be forever?
Stranger: yes
You: shit.
Stranger: i no,it hapened to me once there is only one way to escape it
You: do tell!
Stranger: i have been forced not to tell
You: what can i do for you to tell me?
You: i need out now!
Stranger: ok the gaurds have left now,i can tell,you have to get in your bed,say that life isa game,fall asleep and everything will be ok,fyi=hell has gaurds
You: oh my thank you dear friend!
Stranger: 2012 is reel
You: shit.
Stranger: i cant help u survive that one couse im already dead
You: soo..how is it?
Stranger: bad
Stranger: you might survive if you go in a cave and seal the exit,o no the guards found me…………
You: is there wifi in hell?
Stranger: yes
You: sweet.
Stranger: i no,it makes it that much barable
Stranger: by the way,christiaity is the right religion
You: already there!
Stranger: you will survive if you belive
You: :]
Stranger: foods good here two
You: bbq?
Stranger: yep
Stranger: mostly meat,vegitareans wont survive
You: good i love meat!
Stranger: by the way,2012 will also include demons going on earth ,there is a show called supernatural,every thing is real
You: ….
Stranger: bad thing is ,its like school every day here,you learn,i have to go now since i have to prepare fore a field trip to heaven
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
January 17th, 2010 at 3:37 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: OMG LOL WTFZ0R!!!!111!!oneone
You: Yes, the apple didn’t eat the man
You: It all makes sence
Stranger: wait, yes it did
You: ahh
You: Penuts?
Stranger: you havent heard the story of the flesh eating apple?
Stranger: quite horrific
You: No, tell it young warrior
Stranger: teeth as big as your arm!
Stranger: and an underbite that would rival your best yokel
Stranger: rampaging through downtown LA
Stranger: eating children left and right
Stranger: it was a horrible scene
Stranger: i cant believe you didnt hear about it
Stranger: took fifteen oranges to take the thing down
Stranger: Where are you?
Stranger: dont tell me the apple got you too…
You: Oh god
You: A penut just ate my ballbag
Stranger: why would it do that?
Stranger: seems like a strange thing for a peanut to do
You: I know
You: Wait can you hear that?
Stranger: What sound is it boy
You: No
You: It’s your Ymca record
You: Fag!
You have disconnected
January 20th, 2010 at 11:18 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heeey
You: i like eggs.
Stranger: A. Male seeking normal chat
B. Horny male seeking female
C. Horny male seeking male
D. Female seeking normal chat
E. Horny Female seeking Male
F. Horny Female seeking Female
Stranger: i like girls.
You: i like men and females.
You: and animals.
You: animals are great in bed.
Stranger: how about you ?
Stranger: me too !!
Stranger: male or female ?
You: female.
You: and male
You: i’m both.
Stranger: im a female seeking horny females.
Stranger: [=
Stranger: wanna webcam ?
You: i’m a zebra
You: neigh.
Stranger: sexy.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
January 21st, 2010 at 11:22 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: 22 m
You: hey
You: what wrong with youuuuu?
You: you’re looking kinda down to me
January 21st, 2010 at 11:27 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: what do you want?
You: honestly i’m sick and tired of random people talking to me
Stranger: why r u on here?
You: you started talking to me
You: I was just minding my business then you came and disrupted my peace
Stranger: ur gay
Stranger: fagot
Stranger: cunt
You: get a sense of humour cunt
January 21st, 2010 at 11:40 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hey
You: asl?
Stranger: what is asl?
You: American Sign Language
Stranger: sorry
You: i’m communicating atm understand?
You: can you read my signs?
Stranger: No
You: Yeah American Sign Language is pretty shit tbh
January 21st, 2010 at 11:43 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heyy
You: sorry do I know you?
Stranger: dont think so
Stranger: why
You: ohhh you’re Trevor arent you?
Stranger: nope why?
You: oh come on don’t be like that Trev
Stranger: are u m/f?
You: comeo n you’ve known me for years Trev
You: i’m Barry remember?
Stranger: AW fuck Barry man hows it goin
You: Who the fuck are you?
Stranger: trev
You: how do you know my name?
Stranger: fagg
January 21st, 2010 at 11:57 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hihi
Stranger: asl
Stranger: asl
Stranger: asl
You: easy
You: in a rush or something?
Stranger: asl
Stranger: asl
You: are you a paedophile or something
Stranger: age sex location
Stranger: asl=age sex location
You: really???? I thought it meant American Sign Language……
Stranger: bobo
Stranger: nono
Stranger: here
Stranger: omegle
Stranger: say asl is age sex location
You: you people cannot handle sarcasm over the computer jeez
You: american I guess?
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: yes i guess
You: its alright i’ve already established americans have no sense of humour
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
January 21st, 2010 at 10:39 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Go! Venusaur!
Stranger: Otacon, there appears to be some kind of plant dinosaur blocking my path.
You: Venusaur! use razor leaf!
Stranger: I’m going to try and use CQC to neutralize the target.
You: *swish*
Stranger: Oh, Jesus! There’s leaves everywhere! At least this will help my camo index.
You: venusaur! return!
You: go! charizard!
Stranger: *lies prone and crawls toward trainer*
You: charizard! use flamethrower!
Stranger: *stands up and slams trainer*
Stranger: Otacon, I’m winning! Send me a chopper!
You: charizard! return!
You: go! pidgeot!
You: pidgeot! use gust!
Stranger: Otacon, there’s a bird! I don’t think CQC will wo- Oh, Jesus, it’s blowing me! I’m being blown by a bird!
You: pidgeot! wing attack!
Stranger: Ow!
Stranger: *Whips out tranquilizer gun and shoots Pidgeot*
You: =\
You: pidgeot! return!
You: go! machamp!
You: machamp! use submission!
Stranger: Otacon, this guy has four arms! It’s okay though. As long as I remember the basics of CQC, I should be able to come out on top!
Stranger: *goes up for CQC against Machamp*
You: machamp! low kick!
Stranger: Otacon, I’m not winning anymore! Send me a chopper!
Stranger: *Hides in a box and starts running away*
Stranger: Wait, what? No running from a trainer battle?! Bullshit!
You: machamp! return!
You: go! gengar!
You: gengar! use hypnosis!
Stranger: Hah! I’ve got a highly trained military mind! But… my CQC isn’t working. Otacon, what is this guy?
Stranger: Some kind of… ghost?
Stranger: Oh, Jesus. How can I fight a ghost?
Stranger: *Whips out tranquilizer gun and shoots at Gengar*
You: *it doesnt effect enemy Gengar!*
Stranger: Bullshit. Otacon, what should I do?
Stranger: Hmm… Metal Gear MK II, shock it!
You: *Gengar fainted*
You: Go! charizard!
You: charizard! use flamethrower!
Stranger: Ow! Oh, Jesus! *eats ration*
Stranger: Tasty…
Stranger: *Tries to slam Charizard*
You: *trainer uses hyper potion on Charizard*
You: charizard! slam!
Stranger: NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!
Stranger: Otacon: Snake! Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
February 5th, 2010 at 9:05 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You need to knock some sense into your ego!
Stranger: I do?
You: Yes.
Stranger: How do you know?
You: I am your father.
Stranger: Hi dad
You: Hey Josh!
Stranger: You’re caontacting me from heaven?
You: Yes. I seen what you did last night. Not proud in you, son!
Stranger: Haha, “you daughter” you mean?
Stranger: your*
You: No, son.
You: You are a he/she.
Stranger: Oh man
You: You do as i tell you, son.
You: You are what i tell you, too.
You: Okay. Got it?
Stranger: Yes, Dad
You: Good.
You: I have met Adolf Hitler in heaven.
You: He’s a nice guy.
Stranger: No way?
You: Yes. He said he’s a “changed guy”
Stranger: Hahah, i see
You: I had coffee with him today.
Stranger: what did you guys talk about?
You: How much we hate grass
Stranger: grass? why, you’ve always loved it
You: But you know how i died. Grass got involved! It’s evil, i tell ya!
Stranger: Hahahaha,
Stranger: but why does hitler hate it?
You: Because, uhh, i have no idea.
February 5th, 2010 at 9:12 am
You: Darrel Edward Jason Derulo is coming to town.
Stranger: Santa claud is comming to town
You: No. Just no.
Stranger: who the fuck’s that dad?
You: Thats me, son.
You: Remember!
Stranger: I see
You: Gosh you are a dumb fuck.
Stranger: You raised me
Stranger: (Y)
You: So i can stand on mountains. You raised me up. So i can stand on trees.
You: I am strong. Now i can see your beauty. Yes i am
February 6th, 2010 at 5:36 am
You: I heard about your fish! how is he?
:)
Stranger: holy shit
You: Oh sorry Mafanway
Stranger: what the bloodly hell?
You: Your fish is ill!
Stranger: damn mother fucking
You: Thats very rude. I’m upset now!
Stranger: you are boy or girl?
You: I’m a shark. raawrr!
You: Does that turn you on much
Stranger: what?
You: Does it make your willy go “ooh”
Stranger: get out
You: No you get out
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
February 12th, 2010 at 11:17 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hiiiiiiii
Stranger: 22 m
Stranger: u
You: 20 m + 19 f
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
February 13th, 2010 at 10:50 am
You: Hello!
Stranger: r u male
You: female!
Stranger: oh ok.. im male
Stranger: wats all da exitement about..
You: i do not know
Stranger: its kinda early
You: it’s 16:45 here in the uk
Stranger: oh ok well it 8:45 here in california
You: woah woah woah woah there cowboy!
You: get off the sidewalk and call 911!
You: i’m a pregnant women with an only child!
You: you home skillin’ biscuit!
You: i’m so fly i can make batman cry!
Stranger: wow u must be real bored.. hella random
Stranger: im bored too tho
February 14th, 2010 at 1:20 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
success?
hahahaha
You: Let us celebrate our success!
Stranger:
You: Yes!
You: I have found the meaning of life.. But first.. I must ask you THE QUESTION!
Stranger: okay
You: Do you have any lizards?
Stranger: nah.. i don’t have
You: Oh
You: Well.. I can’t tell you the meaning of life then.. But I can tell you the all powerful fact that leads to enlightenment!
You: Ready?
Stranger: yeah!
You: When a meringue dies, you can use it as a long-distance telephone!
Stranger: O_O
You: Yeah.. It’s shocking..
Stranger: meringue? i can use it?
You: Yup
You: But first you must kill it or there will be too much screaming and thrashing and gnashing of teeth when you insert the SIM card.
Stranger: O_O ahh….
You: Yeah! This took me over 700 years to discover
Stranger: do i have to kill it?
You: Yes
You: Absolutely
Stranger: okay
You: Is killing meringues against your religion/morals?
Stranger: nah
You: Good
You: Just checking
Stranger: hahaha you are soooo funny!!
Stranger: lol
You: Really?
You: You humans are very confusing things..
You: This is a major discovery!
Stranger: O_O aww
Stranger: is that it?
You: For now.
You: While I’m on Earth, I must ask you..
You: What the hell is a condom?
Stranger:
You: Why are you laughing? I need to know
You: I have been observing human activity for 699 years and I still don’t know what a condom is.
Stranger: i don’t know i’ve never used it
You: Ah, so it is something you use..
Stranger: yeah
You: I always thought is was some kind of household appliance.
You: *it
Stranger: ahh you are brilliant!!!!
You: Thank you!
Stranger: have you ever had sex before?
You: Sex? No! My species reproduce by telepathic communication.. Very complex process..
Stranger: LOL
You: I could laugh at human reproduction that easily, too.
Stranger: what’s your look like?
You: I have adapted to look human, but my ancestors had 6 grey tentacles and a large, insect-like orange body. No head.
You: We have many small brains inside our nerves instead of one big one.
You: So we don’t need a head.
Stranger: O_o ohh!!!!!!
Stranger: where do you live now?
You: I’m currently in a suburban English town, but I’m only here for another 298 years then I’m going back to space.
You: Anyways, this is a boring topic of conversation.
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: how old are you?
Stranger: btw
You: 700.
You: This is boring.
You: Everyone asks these questions
Stranger: i mean real age!!
You: 700!
Stranger: okay I’m 937 year old woman from neverland
You: Imbecile. I was going to ask you to marry me but since you’re being a jerk.
You: I’ll just marry my downstairs radiator.
You: I love Neverland.
You: Beautiful place..
Stranger: do you know my place?
You: Neverland.. Yeah
Stranger: did you see peter pan?
You: Yes, Peter Pan is awesome..
You: He let me have tea and cakes with him and Wendy.
You: Wendy is a lovely lady.
Stranger: aww i hate her!!
You: Really?
Stranger: ya!
You: What did she do to you?
Stranger: take him away from me!! my peter pan :’(
You: I’m so sorry..
You: Did I mention, I’ve also been to Neverland Ranch.
Stranger: there is beautiful place!!!
You: Yeah!
You: Fairground rides galore. What I didn’t understand is why there were so many clocks everywhere..
You: Ooh! And I’ve been to Wonderland.
You: It was quite boring, actually.
Stranger: O_O
Stranger: is it bored?
Stranger: no way!!!
You: Yes.
You: I go now.. But I will never forget this encounter!
February 15th, 2010 at 10:09 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: make a story
You: alternate words
You: GO
Stranger: One
You: dark
Stranger: stormy
You: penis
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: make a story
Stranger: Wootamoot
You: alternate words
You: GO
Stranger: was a farmer.
You: he
Stranger: Liked cheese and furry animals
You: because
Stranger: they
You: were
Stranger: rockin’
You: the
Stranger: casbah
You: to
Stranger: Las
You: clashalbum
Stranger: which
You: is
Stranger: a
You: penis
Stranger: bigger than yours!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
February 22nd, 2010 at 6:54 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Bonjour.
Stranger: hello!
You: Ça va bien?
You: whoooa
You: that was weird
You: I felt like i was French for a moment
Stranger: haha wtf.
Stranger: you made me get up google translator for nothing!
You: it might come back anytime
You: Vous vivez à Paris?
Stranger: non
You: what
Stranger: google said that you said “you live in paris?” and i said “no” and it said to say “non”
You: oh
You: maybe you’re right
You: what’s your name
Stranger: emily. yours?
You: franck
You: Ce chat est bleu.
Stranger: really? my is black.
You: your what
Stranger: cat
You: uh
You: interesting
You: thought they were dangerous
Stranger: you siad this cat is blue.
You: you think?
Stranger: and i have two so i think they counteract the badness.
You: yeah maybe
You: i aint superstitious anyway
You: Robert veut du fromage.
Stranger: ew
You: am I disgusting?
You: sorry
You: we shouldn’t talk about superstition
You: got any hobbies?
Stranger: uhm i play flute
You: what kind of flute
Stranger: a sucky one
You: my mom used to play Wester concert flute
You: Il fait froid dehors.
Stranger: dude stop switching languages!
You: switching what
You: is it about the flute?
Stranger: no?
Stranger: what?
Stranger: i’m confused.
Stranger: goodbye.
You: Bon appétit.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
February 28th, 2010 at 8:28 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: omg pls say u like me
Stranger: i love you
You: really
You: i luv u to
You: will u marry me
Stranger: im really hoping your a girl now so that its not gay
You: i am a femaleline
Stranger: femaleline?
You: its like a feline and a girl
You: a cat girl
Stranger: oh thats hot
You: shit yeh
Stranger: wouldnt mind getting some of that
You: no way, u cant breed with a cat
Stranger: but your half girl arent you?
You: which half
Stranger: i assumed you were a humanoid with cat features
You: i have pointy ears
Stranger: describe your body to me
Stranger: all of it
You: and pointy cat nipples on pointy cat boobs
You: do u like cat milk
Stranger: im horny hnow
Stranger: i might
Stranger: you sound so hot
You: ewww, well u can hav e as much milk as u like
You: as long as u stroke my pretty cat pussy
Stranger: cant ssay ive ever tasted cat milk
Stranger: but ill do whatever you want to you ct pussy
You: ct wat is that
Stranger: cat*
You: yes i am a cat
Stranger: im really horny babe
Stranger: wish i could fuck you
You: i bet u wish u cud fuk this cat hole
Stranger: yeah babe
You: lift my tail up
Stranger: ok babe
You: be careful, i scratch n bite sometimes
Stranger: i wanna suck oon your nipples
You: my pointy cat nipples yes
You: say it like that boy
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: i wanna suck your pointy cat nipples
Stranger: and stick my cock into your cat pussy
You: i am a siamnese dont u kno
You: cud u imagine fucking a siamnese cats pussy
Stranger: i am right now
You: really, u cheated on me
You: i thought i was the only cat love u had
Stranger: im imagining yours babe
You: oh my
You: holdin my tail
You: ?
Stranger: yeah
You: touching my face an whiskers
Stranger: yeah
You: wat colour r my eyes
Stranger: green
You: o my u really r, i can see u
You: inside my cat hole
Stranger: im pounding it hard babe
Stranger: and your scratching me in pleauser
Stranger: pleasure*
You: oh my, u r so good at this
You: can i ask u a secret
Stranger: yeah
You: will u put it in my cat anus
Stranger: if you want me to babe
Stranger: id love to
You: its a little tight
Stranger: can you lick my cock first then babe
You: wait babe tell me wat my cat ass feels like
You: it smells sweet
Stranger: the fur is nice and soft and its tight around my cock
You: the fur, oh my u really r fukin a cat
You: it feels so good
You: tell me wat u want my cat to do
Stranger: well you know i assumed that you had fur haha
You: cat body to do
Stranger: i want you to spread your legs apart
You: i wanted to scratch up ur cock first
Stranger: go ahead babe
You: really tear it up and rips it apart
Stranger: thats so hot babe
Stranger: im sooo horny
Stranger: i need to stick it inside you
You: u r, u r fukin a cat
You: ok remeber i have a very very small cat pussy
Stranger: ill be gentle and go slowly in babe
You: cats like it slow
You: cAts r smaller than humans u kno
Stranger: but your a human cat arent you
You: no i am a cat
Stranger: oh ok
You: wat u dont like fukin a siamnese cat anymore
Stranger: never said that
You: why u say
You: oh
Stranger: haha
Stranger: i still wanna pund your cat pussy babe
You: have u ever fuked any other animals babe, i hope u only fuk cats, not sheep or anything else
Stranger: pound*
Stranger: never babe
You: why, cuz u only like cats
You: that is good
Stranger: ive never thought of fucking another animal
Stranger: ive been waiting for you my whole life
You: really, not even an other cat u r too good
You: wat if i died, wud u have me stuffed?
February 28th, 2010 at 12:18 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: licks stranger’s earlobe
Stranger: Asl
You: i have 2pubes today
March 4th, 2010 at 10:05 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: Hello.
You: asl
Stranger: The Wise Sage can give you advice.
Stranger: Will you choose to accept?
You: yes
You: i accept
Stranger: Pick an option :
Stranger: 1. Love
Stranger: 2. Friends
Stranger: 3. Work
You: uhh
You: 1
Stranger: Are you male or female?
You: m
Stranger: Processing….
Stranger: Male for Love : Lately, the field has been looking empty. Without any ladies to pursue, you’ve been feeling a little down. Keep your chin up and that special someone may turn out to be someone you may not have expected before.
Stranger: Would you like to choose another option or terminate this session?
You: another
Stranger: 1. Love
Stranger: 2. Friends
Stranger: 3. Work
You: 1
Stranger: * Remember to IM TheWiseSage2 at AIM! *
Stranger: Male for Love – this option has already been chosen.
Stranger: Please choose another option.
You: i want female for love
Stranger: Female for Love : After being stood up by someone you desired, the road to love has been pretty dark. You will have difficulty in love for March, but small opportunities will come your way.
Stranger: Would you like to choose another option or terminate this session?
You: another
Stranger: * Remember to IM TheWiseSage2 at AIM! *
Stranger: 1. Love
Stranger: 2. Friends
Stranger: 3. Work
You: love for hermaphrodite
Stranger: The gender must be chosen : Male or Female.
You: both
You: hermaphrodite
You: both organs
You: you know
Stranger: Error processiong request.
Stranger: SHIT.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 5th, 2010 at 1:20 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: im a girl masturbating, can you help get me off?
Stranger: hey
Stranger: sue
Stranger: sure
You: my pussy is so wet
You: it feels so warm inside’
Stranger: just imagine my hard eight inch cock teasing at your entrance
You: mmmm
Stranger: i slowly enter you one massive hard inch at a time
You: ooh keep talking to me
Stranger: i slowly rock back and forth thrusting deep inside you
Stranger: i reach one hand down and play with your clit
You: my clit is throbbing so hard
Stranger: i thrust harder and faster penetrating deep inside your pussy my cock is throbbings
Stranger: imagine me filling you
You: oh im about to cum
Stranger: oh me too i shoot my load deep into your pussy as i play with your clit and bring you to orgasm
Stranger: how was that
You: oh i just came so hard
You: im shaking all over
You: my heart is racing
You: my whole body is numb and throbbing
Stranger: you’re welcom
Stranger: wanna help me?
You: hehe thank you =)
You: yes =)
You: Imagine me rubbing my throbbing clit and playing with my wet pussy waiting for you to penetrate me with your hard cock
You: you slowly enter me and I bite your ears and lip asking you to thrust harder and deeper
You: my tight pussy can hardly handle the size and I scream from pain and enjoyment
You: and then i ask you to cum deep inside of me
Stranger: oh keep going
You: i scratch my nails down your back and bite your neck, feeling so much pleasure, but before you cum I throw you off of me and get down on my knees and take your huge cock into my mouth, wrapping my full, sexy lips around it
You: i let you pull my hair and i moan from pleasure, waiting for you to cum into my mouth
Stranger: almost there
You: i suck harder and faster, getting your cock deep into my throat, waiting to taste you, loving the way you feel in my mouth
Stranger: describe yourself
You: my hair is long and dark brown, my eyes are light green and my skin is dark and tanned, my body is toned, my pussy is tight and im a 34 DD, all natural
Stranger: thanks
You: hehe =) no problem sweetie
You: I am actually a 54 year old homosexual man.
March 5th, 2010 at 1:31 am
You: Im on a boat motherfucker!
Stranger: I LIKE TO HAVE FUCKING GRAPES IN THE MORNING
You: hahaha
Stranger: GRAPPPPPPES IN THE MORNINGGGGGG
Stranger: grapessssssssss in the morninggggggggggggggggggg
Stranger: dude
Stranger: if you’re on a boat
Stranger: and I got the grapes
Stranger: that can only mean one thing
You: ORGY!
March 5th, 2010 at 1:32 am
You: HOLA MAMA CITA
Stranger: hi
Stranger: i’m a guy
You: SI ESTA EL BANO?
You: I dont give a fuck
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 5th, 2010 at 1:34 am
You: Bananas.
You: ?
You: You no likey the bananas?
You: FUCKIN SHIT
You: FUCK!
You: THATS BULLSHIT
You: Sorry, that was my alter ego, Fred.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 6th, 2010 at 10:04 pm
Stranger: hi im a guy
You: i started a masturbation cult
You: wanna join?
Stranger: sure
You: all you gotta do is sign your name in your spunk
You: and you’re in
You: then we jack each other off for like 3-4 hours, play CoD, get high and jackoff again
You: (no homo though)
You: its totally straight broham
You: just gimme a handjob
You: and you’re in
Stranger: 21 m here
Stranger: wacko
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 12:51 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: FUCK U STRANGER!
Stranger: hey
Stranger: :O
You: im scared of meeting strangers
Stranger: you don’t even know me
You: thus, you are a stranger
Stranger: whys that?
You: moron
You: can i tell u something
Stranger: sure
You: youre a nincompoop charva licking ninnyhammer!
Stranger: and ur a 12 year old who thinks they’re funny
You: you cant even tell a blightpot from a blimey
Stranger: stop talking shit, you don’t know me so you can’t judge me
You: quit being an eejit
Stranger: wow, i’m so insulted
You: youre gormless
You: you grotty muppet munter!
Stranger: and you, my friend, are retarded
You: whats the difference from a poxy and a pillock?
Stranger: you are not funny
Stranger: i don’t know, but you are probably both
You: the answer is 2! the cops fuck one way, the niggers smoke another!
You: ahaha
You: youre so uneducated on olde english insults
Stranger: i can’t believe you get entertainment from this
You: you skanky shite scrubber!
You: hey guess what
Stranger: no, i’m from england
You: youre an uphill gardener
Stranger: and i’m probably more educated than you
You: you wazzack wally tyke faced ninnyhammering cum dumpster!
Stranger: so shut up
You: no!
Stranger: wow, what a loser
You: quit poxying my ninny
Stranger: your mother must hate you
You: pikey my nutter
You: wanna go munging
You: you cheeky cobbler!
Stranger: whatever that even means….
Stranger: you weird loser
You: grow some bollocks
Stranger: wow…..
Stranger: i never knew people were that sad
You: you dozy uphill gardening piss artist!
Stranger: facepalm
You: manky minger munging muppet master
You: whats a facepalm
Stranger: i can’t believe you find this funny
You: whats a funny
Stranger: retard
You: whats a retard
Stranger: wow, you are hilarious……
You: aww why you gotta manky my mutter
You: we’re just 2 buds havin some fun!
Stranger: who are 10?
You: pish pikey
Stranger: you sound way young
You: po faced poxy prat
You: call me one more name and ill blabberoyster your entire family!
Stranger: dickhead
You: trollop?
Stranger: just try it fucktard
You: try what
Stranger: you are so unfunny its depressing
You: wally my wazzack and ill octaviayshel your face
You: hahah your face cant even poxy somebodys wazzack
Stranger: bye
You: wait
You: seriously
Stranger: ok, what?
You: can i tell you something for real this time
Stranger: i will go if its not serious
You: youre a prat scrubbing no good muppet hunting homosexual!
Stranger: mature….
Stranger: bye
You: come over to my house
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 1:05 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: FUCK YOU STRANGER!
Stranger: same with u
You: youre a nincompooping ninnyhammer!
Stranger: neenu obba soole maga
You: i bet you cant even tell a berk from a barmpot!
You: ahahha^^^
You: you little bloody blighter
Stranger: i bet u cant even buy shit
You: you blooming bollocks butter
Stranger: u r shit fucker
You: you uphill gardener!
You: ahahah
Stranger: u are an cow-er
You: your face is SO ugly, it cant even poxy somebodys chav!
You: LOL!
Stranger: u pubes shaver
You: you little divvy dodger
You: grow some bollocks
You: honestly, youre pretty gormless
You: LOL!
Stranger: lol
Stranger: ur mama is so poor dat she wanked u off and applied ur spank as body lotion
You: grotty manky minger! xD
Stranger: grunty bithcy smaker
You: you nancy naff muppet munter LMAO!
Stranger: u rofl whiper ass striker
You: OOOhhh fiesty….pikey my pillock baby
Stranger: ridin red hood periods blood suker
You: pish plonker! LOL
Stranger: cinderalla ass washer
You: youre such a po faced proxy, that you wazzacked his prat! LMFAO!
You: XD hahahahha
You: owned!!!!!11
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 4:38 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Bisexual horny m with cam here.
You: ok
You: go on
Stranger: Lets go to msn and screw around
You: ok
You: go on
Stranger: cut the bullshit
You: ok
You: go on
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 7:22 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: WHO AM I
Stranger: hey guy
You: im a girl
Stranger: you are not
You: i am not what
Stranger: girl
You: what about girl
Stranger: you are Asian
You: whats an asian
Stranger: people from Asia
You: what are people from asia called
Stranger: you
You: what am i
Stranger: you stupid guy
You: whoa
Stranger: country?
You: uncalled for!
You: whats a country
Stranger: your country?
You: what about it
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 8:54 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: triathlete
You: trisexual
Stranger: no just a triathlete
You: tricycle
Stranger: u?
You: triad
You: triangle
Stranger: tripod
You: tripoli
Stranger: triple
You: trichome
Stranger: trifecta
You: herm.
Stranger: hat trick
You: trim
Stranger: tripe
Stranger: this is rediculous
Stranger: how are u?
You: youre rediculous
You: im as old as you
Stranger: oh really?
You: plus 1 minus 8 divided by 69
You: yes really
Stranger: boooooo
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 8:58 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: i started a cult
Stranger: heyyyy
Stranger: what about
You: its a masturbation cult
You: we jack each other off for hours on end
You: then play CoD
You: then put all our cum into a pool
You: and we each take a pint of jizz home
Stranger: hmmmmm can join
You: you have to give me a handjob
You: and youre in
Stranger: okayyy souns goood
You: ok
You: jack me off
Stranger: okay
You: that was nice
You: youre in
Stranger: (:
Stranger: i thought you’d likethat
Stranger: my turn
You: our first meeting is next sunday
You: your turn for what
You: youre only a pledge
You: you dont get handjobs yet
Stranger: fine then
You: yeah
Stranger: wheres this meeting
You: everywhere
You: yet nowhere
You: nah its gonna be at Blake’s house this week
You: he just got 12 chrome dildos
Stranger: :O
You: i know
You: so tempting
Stranger: hes my new best friend
You: no! he’s mine you queer
You have disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 9:32 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hey hey hey
Stranger: hey asl?
You: no way way
Stranger: alright alright, fag fag
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:09 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: i’m a guy
You: i’m a girl
Stranger: hi girl
Stranger: how old are you?
You: sorry, i meant i’m a girl fucker
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:11 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: hi
You: asl?
Stranger: interested on a girl
You: interested on a girl
Stranger: thats what i said
You: thats what i said
Stranger: are you a copy person
You: are you a copy person
Stranger: oh your so annoying bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:12 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: haha, nice
You: haha, nice
Stranger: I LIKE YOUR MOM
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:13 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey there sexy
You: hey there sexy
Stranger: lol
You: lol
Stranger: stop that
You: stop that
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:18 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: yeah?
Stranger: yeah
You: so?
Stranger: wat
You: give me a topic i’ll improv
Stranger: uhmm boozy
You: shit that’s hard
You: something else
Stranger: lol haha
Stranger: uhmmm llamas XD
You: ok i saw one the other day
Stranger: rlly/
You: yeah on the discovery channel
Stranger: omg! thats awesome!
You: he was trying to get pass the desert stupid thing
You: running around
Stranger: ur calling llamas stupid?
You: yeah, what do you call something that spits all the time and poops unwillingly
Stranger: well llamas rock! dont diss the llama!
You: llamas even look stupid
You: their eyes face different ways man
Stranger: so
You: it’s like text book stupid
Stranger: lol haha ur so mean to llamas!
You: well but camels
You: that’s what i call class
Stranger: camels suck!
You: no shit man
Stranger: lol llamas r way better
You: man even the double l gets me
You: why not lama
You: i mean who decides this shit anyway
Stranger: lol llamas dont have the thingys no their back!
You: its like bad typo
Stranger: so lol
You: well theyre poor man
You: look at the camel they carry their own shit
You: like troopers
Stranger: lol o rlly now?
You: ready for action all the time
Stranger: yeah true but im just sayin llamas r better lol
Stranger: XD
You: come the desert they can beat it in a heartbeat
You: give one reason
Stranger: why llamas r better?
You: yeah
You: hard tiem figuring that out didnt ya
Stranger: because they spit at people who suck! they probably live longer and at least llamas dont hold it in theyll get a infection
You: well thatS actually true
You: ok you win this round
You: but listen to this
Stranger: haha yay!
You: remember conan
You: the movie
Stranger: no ive never heard of it before
You: arnold kicked a llama’s ass in that movie man, knocked it out cold
You: conan the barbarian, man no shit u never watched it?!
Stranger: thats not fair tho! it has to stand on all four legs so its a unfair right
Stranger: lol no ive never seen it
You: but the thing is huge
Stranger: so lol its still not fair
Stranger: XD
You: i mean ok arnold is a bit of a huge guy himself
Stranger: yeah true
You: and he’s mayor now so that’s kinda proves i’m right
You: or i think he still is, is he?
Stranger: uhmm idk i dont pay attention to the mayor
Stranger: lol
You: he’s fat too
Stranger: haha yeah true but im not gonna diss arnold
Stranger: hah
You: so i think now it’s fair for them to fight, cos arnolds gonna have to stand on all fours soon enough if he puffs uf still
You: yeah and with that accent, he sure has to spit alot
You: i think i just realized that maybe arnold’s a bit of llama himself
Stranger: lmao!!!!!
Stranger: haha i never looked at him that way he cant be a llama!
Stranger: he doesnt have all the features…he will look like a mental llama
You: or a llama retard
You: shunned from his breed because of his freaky features
Stranger: haha thats pissin!
You: shame on the llama’s for giving him a hard time just because he’s so different
Stranger: haha maybe hes a mean llama thats why thei did taht
You: you’re good looking here but a freak amongs your own arnold, poor guy
You: yeah that rings true
You: a rogue llama
Stranger: haha
You: against all odds he suffers the exile and rises as a mayor frm the other end
You: darth llama himself i might say
You: he’s closer to them color skinwise too
Stranger: lmao! hes a darth mental llama who is never gonna fit in!
Stranger: grr
You: yeah he can fool the llamas but he cant fool me man
Stranger: he cant fool me either
You: i’m on to you arnold, you can shave, you can use mouth plugs but you can’t foll me
Stranger: haha true dat
You: he has too many teeth anyways
You: and his mouth is a bit odd
You: i think we’re the only ones you knows his secret man you should take care and protect yourself from now on
Stranger: haha yeah that is true! and he has odly short bushy eyebrows!
You: llama are everywhere!
Stranger: lol haha
Stranger: they are!!!! :O
You: shit
Stranger: omg! im scaredd!
You: don’t be
You: we have all we need here
You: to kill the llama you must know the llama
You: and as of now we are prepared
Stranger: yess we r
You: because we know him but arnold, he doesnt know we are aware
You: im now initiating a secret organization, friend
You: you and I form now on will be known as llamasters!
You: he who master the llama
Stranger: omg! its a honor
You: you deserve it
You: go forth and spread the word
You: and be not scared of the spit
You: for we wear head gear
Stranger: lol haha
You: it’s complamentary
Stranger: lol rlly now?
You: i will send you further detais via claod signals and small trained doves
Stranger: lol alrighty
You: this meeting is over friend…
You: good luck on your fight against the four legged beast!
Stranger: k i think ill be ready
You: im sure you are
Stranger: yep yep
You: good luck
Stranger: ok i hafta ask… r u a guy or a girl?
You: i’m a guy mate
Stranger: cool cool
You: should i ask you then
Stranger: lol yeah
Stranger: im a girl lol
You: this goes right into your profile
You: ok then
You: no matter
You: we need every able human to fight on our cause
You: arnold will be beaten
Stranger: lol yes we do
Stranger: one day it will be in the news!
You: don’t forget to tell your friends about us
Stranger: ok i wont forget
You: we give coupons every year
You: ok then i take my leave
Stranger: rlly? lol
You: well i guess
You: i can spend some more time
You: give me another topic if you will, i will improv again
You: if you like what i do that is
Stranger: well i hafta go
Stranger: which sux
You: ok then take care it was fun
Stranger: yeah it was
You: bye
Stranger: lol k bibi
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:37 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: fine
You: you?
Stranger: asl
Stranger: good
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 7th, 2010 at 10:53 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: fine, you?
Stranger: I am 10 years old.
Stranger: I need a mommy
You: hahah yea i dont get it either
Stranger: oh, too bad
You: its bad isnt it
You: youre in that?
You: wow dude
Stranger: but do you have a daddy?
You: how do you do it
You: i cant believe it
You: i thought she quit?
You: wow, good for her
You: i always saw myself as an actor
You: haha! thanks
Stranger: **
You: yea well maybe youll make it too
Stranger: ^^
You: idk if you want
You: you need it?
You: yea for a little while
You: ok
You: what you want for it
You: nothing man its just for you
You: wow!
You: really?
You: yeah
You: thanks dude
Stranger: are you talking to yourself?
You: ill be careful with it
You: i trust you
You: haha thanks man
You: so where you gonna be tomorrow
You: you meeting tim at the mall?
You: yeah i know he’s such an ass sometimes
You: but whatever he’s family you know?
You: yeah for sure
You: what are you guys gonna do
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 8:38 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: do u want cyber sex, im a girl
Stranger: hey..
Stranger: are you interesting enoug?
You: m/f?
Stranger: i don’t want no webcam and porn site adverts…
Stranger: M of course…
Stranger: 22 M
You: text only.
Stranger: yeah.. text only..
You: u start
Stranger: and only if you make it interesting..
Stranger: ummm… what are you wearing??
You: let me lick ur dick then.
You: is it hard?
Stranger: you wanna jump the steps?
Stranger: you gotta make it hard babe…
You: come on…
Stranger: tell me smthing abt you..
You: kick u, fuck u,
Stranger: you gotta seduce me sweets..
You: push it into my mouth, stop talking
Stranger: tht don’t turn me on..
Stranger: ah..
Stranger: thr you go..
Stranger: it’s gonna grow bigger in your mouth…
Stranger: you feel it growing??
Stranger: i’m thrusting it all in…
Stranger: it’s gonna grow huge enough to hit the back of your throat..
You: eww why does that animal of yours taste like urinary discharge. u dont wash ur dick? off u GO, im biting it off. scream,
You have disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 8:44 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: do u want cyber sex, im a girl
Stranger: hey..
Stranger: are you interesting enoug?
You: m/f?
Stranger: i don’t want no webcam and porn site adverts…
Stranger: M of course…
Stranger: 22 M
You: text only
Stranger: yeah.. text only..
You: u start
Stranger: and only if you make it interesting..
Stranger: ummm… what are you wearing??
You: let me lick ur dick then.
You: is it hard?
Stranger: you wanna jump the steps?
Stranger: you gotta make it hard babe…
You: come on…
Stranger: tell me smthing abt you..
You: kick u, fuck u,
Stranger: you gotta seduce me sweets..
You: push it into my mouth, stop talking
Stranger: tht don’t turn me on..
Stranger: ah..
Stranger: thr you go..
Stranger: it’s gonna grow bigger in your mouth…
Stranger: you feel it growing??
Stranger: i’m thrusting it all in…
Stranger: it’s gonna grow huge enough to hit the back of your throat..
You: eww why does that animal of yours taste like urinary discharge. u dont wash ur dick? off u GO, im biting it off. scream,
You have disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 4:09 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello you yummy stranger.
You: I have a favor to ask of you.
Stranger: what?
You: Can you drop off my iPhone I left at your house from Saturday’s party?
You: If I find out you bought any apps, I will unleash my ninnyhammer on you
Stranger: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
You: uphill gardener!
Stranger: i need more cowbell for this
You: herpes harvester
Stranger: mm, be careful. my penis is huge. i may just have to hit you with it.
You: rectal ranger
Stranger: and i’m a girl. talk about rare
You: yeah seriously
You: i really like me a bitch with a big fat cock
You: its the whole package ya know?
Stranger: mine can choke a horse; just sayin’
You: really?
You: mine can choke jenna jameson
You: talk about rare
Stranger: oh yeah. it’s as long as PVC pipe insulation, and is as big around as a cheese wheel.
You: oh yeah i wear a tuna can as a jockstrap
You: its not long just wide and fat
You: a big juicy chode
Stranger: i gotta go. have fun trying to choke jenna jameson
You: wait
You: can i tell you something
Stranger: What?
You: You have AIDS.
Stranger: SHHHH! It’s a secret!
You: obviously not
You: you should get it checked out
You: like a library book
You: i know a doctor who’s better than a sore dick
You: just can’t beat it
Stranger: Good one, figwart.
You: fuck you ninnyhammer
You: you uphill gardening poxy picker!
You: LOL!
Stranger: hahahah nice:D asl?
You: 49 m italy
You: you?
Stranger: not talking ot you anymore.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 4:13 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: fine you?
Stranger: I am good
You: hi
Stranger: Yes hi
You: how are you?
Stranger: I am good
You: ask me how i am!
Stranger: How are you
You: fine you?
Stranger: I am good
You: hi
Stranger: are you male or female
You: how are you?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 4:15 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: fine, you?
Stranger: fine
Stranger: you
You: fine, you?
Stranger: you fine?
You: yep! you?
Stranger: yep! you?
You: yep! you?
Stranger: “Death To The False Emperor?!”
You: fine, you?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 4:17 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: i cant believe this!!!
You: did you hear about what happened
Stranger: no what?
You: ok so you know omegle.com right?
Stranger: Yep
You: there was this one stranger, who disconnected on somebody else while telling an important story!
You have disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 4:28 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: good job!
Stranger: thanks!
You: you’re officially the most retarded person between the 2 of us!
You: do you wish to accept your ribbon?
Stranger: i think not!
You: so i can keep it?
Stranger: well if u dont mind i dont hav a speech
You: Nope, I definitely don’t not mind.
Stranger: then ill take it!
You: in the butt?
Stranger: well! i never!
You: first anal huh?
You: its ok its awesome
You: for both of us ;D
You: dont worry most nerve endings are in the anus
Stranger: such rudeness not to be expected from a kind internet stranger!
You: why not
You: and if im so kind, how can i be rude
Stranger: well mayb im just naive bc i assume all internet strangers r kind
You: does that include you or no?
Stranger: yes… yes it does!
You: why did you say “yes” twice in the same sentence
Stranger: ur a tricky little fucker arnet you?
You: no
You: do you think i am?
You: its all relative, really.
Stranger: that is the assesment i have made…. yes
You: you haven’t assessed anything yet.
You: did you file it with the bureau of assessments?
You: even if you did, theres a 20 day waiting period
Stranger: yes i did! and i locked the file cabnet and fed the key to my cat
You: but theres still 20 days
You: until it becomes an official assessment
You: its all politics
Stranger: well not if ur the keeper of the files, which i am!
You: but still, you’re a liar for saying you made an assessment
Stranger: no im not. u common folk just dont understand the complex systems lik this
You: define common
Stranger: why! il do nothing of the sort!
You: what’s a sort
Stranger: it shall remain an enigma for you, while i shall know!
You: what’s an enigma
Stranger: yes, i would expect you to ask. that is now your problem, hahaha good luck sleeping tonight!
Stranger: wahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: how does one really “sleep”?
You: and is there a such thing as “good” luck?
You: whats the solution to a problem
You: how can you expect me to ask
You: what’s a “wahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Stranger: omg my dads home! hes gonna beat me! g2g!
You: ok!
You: take it in the ass!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 5:19 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: **Disclaimer: Everything I say should be taken literally and 100% serious. Seriously.**
You: hi
Stranger: hello
You: im going to rape you in the ear while you sleep
Stranger: ok I will take it serious
You: why
You: its a joke you creep
Stranger: what if aI wake up
You: idk what if you wake up
Stranger: you must be awful young
You: you must be awfully immature to play off of my young age and thrust yourself up on the power scale
You: you are just trying to win your father’s approval
You: tsk tsk
You: channeling your energy into other facets of life
You: yet you are going nowhere
Stranger: what is your age and sex
You: just give up young apprentice, just give up
You: im a 45 year old fat guy eating 89 cent burritos from taco bell while talking on omegle to find friends
You: you?
Stranger: I am to smart to talk to you
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 5:30 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: someones gay?
Stranger: there is alot of gay people
You: someones gay?
Stranger: alot of people are
You: someones gay?
Stranger: i bey you are
You: someones gay?
Stranger: r u?
You: someones gay?
Stranger: im sure you are
You: someones gay?
Stranger: and
You: someones gay?
Stranger: me
You: someones gay?
Stranger: i am not
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no
You: someones gay?
Stranger: sorry
You: someones gay?
Stranger: not
You: someones gay?
Stranger: sorry
You: someones gay?
Stranger: why
You: someones gay?
Stranger: how
You: someones gay?
Stranger: what?
You: someones gay?
Stranger: rally?
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no
You: someones gay?
Stranger: r u serious
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: you are
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: i know
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: u said so
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: what?
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: no way
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: omg
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: u are
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: i kow
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: yeah
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: really?????
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: u sad that before
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: no
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: i cant believe it
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: when did u come out of the closet
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: not too long ago
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: what
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: r u serious
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: u have to be
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: i knew u were
You: someones mega-gay?
Stranger: why are you doing this
You: someones gay?
Stranger: ????
You: someones gay?
Stranger: que?
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no comprede
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no se
You: someones gay?
Stranger: qie
You: someones gay?
Stranger: omg
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no
Stranger: way
You: ]someones gay?
Stranger: haha
You: someones gay?
Stranger: jaja
You: someones gay?
Stranger: whait
You: someones gay?
Stranger: what???
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no
You: someones gay?
Stranger: no puede ser
Stranger: adios
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: thats what they call you
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: u are
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: i know
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: you are
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: omg
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: haha
You: someones king of gays?
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: haha
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: ok
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: this is
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: gay
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: see you
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: later
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: have
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: a
You: someones king of gays?
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: great
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: day
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: ok
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: peace
You: someones king of gays?
Stranger: bye
You: someones king of gays?
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: adios
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: i have homework
You: fag leaving?
Stranger:
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: it sucks
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: i have to
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: get it done
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: before
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: i go out
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: see you
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: bye
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: yes
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: sorry
You: fag leaving?
Stranger: last time bye
You: fag leaving?
Your conversational partner has disconnected
March 8th, 2010 at 5:36 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: someones gay?
Stranger: not me
You: someones gay?
Stranger: nope
You: someones gay?
Stranger: maybe you
You: someones gay?
Stranger: but not me
You: someones gay?
Stranger: you’re a slow typer
You: someones gay?
Stranger: naah
You: someones gay?
Stranger: stop talking about yourself! damn
You: someones gay?
Stranger: SOMEONES GAY? yeah, it’s you actually.
You: someones gay?
Stranger: i love gay people
You: someones gay?
Stranger: especially you
You: someones gay?
Stranger: you’re my favoite
You: someones gay?
Stranger: shh don’t tell anyone
You: someones gay?
Stranger: okok ill come out of the closet
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: i’m gay!
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: sheesh
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: YES I’M ULTRAGAY
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: YESSS I LOVE IT IN THE BUTT
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: <3333 you know it.
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: lemme hear you say aah
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: yum
You: someones ultragay?
Stranger: YES
Stranger: GOD DAMN
You: hahah you said youre gay
You have disconnected.
March 8th, 2010 at 10:34 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: i’m not retarded, are you?
Stranger: yeah duiiii
You: i’m not retarded, are you?
Stranger: fml
You: i’m not retarded, are you?
Stranger: nop
You: i’m not retarded, are you?
Stranger: nbtgkmdccv;lfvtgyucfl;’o[
Stranger: f'tgp-y[h
Stranger: f
Thg
You: i'm not retarded, are you?
Stranger: Ff
GT]hyF
TGhGF
gh
Stranger: tgyh
Stranger: g
Stranger: ftujyt
Stranger: ghjmnuhgfg
Stranger: nm
Stranger: tg
Stranger: yhju
Stranger: juhytgfgh
Stranger: yg
Stranger: tfrg
Stranger: bhf
Stranger: gh
Stranger: gf
Stranger: fgh
Stranger: ygtfr
Stranger: ghg
Stranger: fd
Stranger: fgh
Stranger: f
Stranger: g
Stranger: fd
Stranger: g
Stranger: vfd
Stranger: gtf
Stranger: ed]fd
Stranger: fd
Stranger: c
Stranger: cf
Stranger: gv
Stranger: g
Stranger: v
Stranger: gg
Stranger: vg
Stranger: v
Stranger: g
Stranger: vg
Stranger: v
Stranger: gv
Stranger: g
Stranger: gv
Stranger: gg
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: g
Stranger: n
Stranger: n
Stranger: n
Stranger: n
Stranger: n
Stranger: n
You: i’m not retarded, are you?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 9th, 2010 at 8:00 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: i heard you suck dick?
Stranger: yes!
You: i heard you suck dick?
Stranger: tasty
You: i heard you suck dick?
Stranger: ;jklfsdkf
You: do you watch pay gorn
Stranger: gay porn, yeah
You: no you ninnyhammer
You: pay gorn
Stranger: i donno what that is
You: *facepalm*
You: you serious
Stranger: yeah *cowers in corner*
You: get in the corner delicious stranger
You: while i seduce you with my zebra fur
Stranger: yeah, no
You: why
Stranger: cos im not a furry
You: how can you say yeah and no
You: that contradicts
You: liar!
Stranger: i understand
Stranger: fuck off
You: wanna watch?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 10th, 2010 at 7:21 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey.
You: ur fuckin cool
Stranger: i know, thanks.
You: sayin “hey” like you own the place
You: who the FUCK do you think you are
You: honestly
You: anywho
You: don’t worry how my wrist got so freeze, tell ya girl like doritos thats nacho cheese
Stranger: nice.
Stranger: well, bye.
You: i agree
You: no
You: wait
You: let’s chat
You: so? how’s the wife
You: i havent seen you in ages
Stranger: great.. i know, what have you been up too?
You: since the last BBQ that your dad shot a squirrel with your bb gun
You: nothing much, nothing much
You: just work you know
You: porn has gotten big nowadays
You: work has become so much of a hassle
Stranger: but honestly, gotta go. dont want to waste any time on you, you know?
You: no
You: wait
You: why
You:
You: i thought we had something
Stranger: your probably like 14 dude..
You: i love you
You: please dont leave me
You: im 17
You: and all alone
Stranger: you’ll live.
You: no
You: i just died
Stranger: im sorry.
You: *death*
Stranger: nicee. well cyaaa.
You: no worries i ressurrected myself
You: now we can talk!
You: where are you from
Stranger: lol. really?
Stranger: michigan.. you?
You: no shit
You: illinois
Stranger: nicee.
You: illini>wolverines
You: and spartans
You: and lions
You: bears much better
Stranger: well im not a michigan fan.. so it’s alright.
You: oh well thats good
You: k i gotta go
You have disconnected.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:00 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: sippin sizzurp
Stranger: heyy
You: y’dig
You: sheeeeeeet wazz up gurl
You: how u bee
Stranger: nuthin babe im great
You: i have a boner
Stranger: oo i know what to do with that
Stranger: how big?
You: like 3 cm
Stranger: dayummm thats huge!
You: i know
You: thx babyyy
Stranger: ill put it in a lawnmover
You: whyyy
Stranger:
You:
You: that’s hot
Stranger: its hawt
You: nice
You: you get me babe
Stranger: when you’re bleeding all over the place
You: you really understand me
You: mmmmm
You: blood sacrifice
Stranger: fuck yeah
You: fuck yeah babe
You: cut off my balls
You: mmmmm
Stranger: then ill feed it to you
You: OMG
You: I JUST CAME
Stranger: FUCKKK YEAH
You: hellz yeah
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 11th, 2010 at 7:33 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
take care
Stranger: hello
You: dino dino dino saur
Stranger: dude or bitch/
You: whore
You: or skank
You: or slut
You: whichever you prefer to call me
Stranger: shit
Stranger: you know life is big shit
You: yup. ive yet to see bigger shit
Stranger: my shit?
Stranger: or your bf shit?
You: i have bf shit? aha
Stranger: im talkin about penis babe
You: bahaha
Stranger: asl?
You: well you know what they say about size vs. ego
Stranger: HOT
Stranger: so asl?
Stranger: asl?
Stranger: need to know if you can be my babe
You: lmao 16 skank australia
You: im no ones babe
You: aha
Stranger: sweet
You: you?
Stranger: 18 male australia no joke im surprised
You: serious? aha
You: what state?
Stranger: yup
Stranger: your state is my stae
Stranger: state
Stranger: i mean
You: sure thing
You: my house then? aha
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: if you want to
You: lmao
Stranger: you make make me fall for you
You: haha well there’s nothing to catch you so watch out
Stranger: are you hot
You: i’m smoking lmao
Stranger: to tell you the truth
You: hm?
Stranger: im an emo
You: haha great for you
Stranger: you make bleed
Stranger: i love you
You: now we’re onto crazy shit huh? lmao
Stranger: think of me and ill think of you
You: haha
Stranger: LMFAO
Stranger: hey i think youre beautiful
You: haha just personality-wise?
Stranger: just like the stars in the sky
You: haha aw how sweet
Stranger: what do you mean?
Stranger: thank you
You: well you have no idea what i look like hey?
You: lmao
Stranger: i think youre perfect
Stranger: not kidding
Stranger: not telling you this to like
Stranger: me
Stranger: this is how i feel
You: haha you might not be kidding, though you might just not know what you’re saying
Stranger: with you its different
Stranger: though i cant see you
You: haha
You: i’m not the only girl out here that will make you feel this way
Stranger: dont you feel the same way
Stranger: im weirded out really
Stranger: but
Stranger: i like you
You: haha great
You: well theres a difference when you say like
Stranger: oh youre a nice girl
Stranger: a sweet girl
You: haha thanks
Stranger: make sure youre bf not gonna hurt you
Stranger: or else ill hurt him
You: lmao
You: xD
Stranger: i can see from the way you talk that youre a nice person
Stranger: youre the longestperson i ever talk with
You: haha really?
Stranger: wait my sisters comin
You: lmao okay
Stranger: im back
You: welcome back xD
Stranger: wait
You: hm?
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: im so sorry
You: for what?
Stranger: my siter kept on comin
Stranger: back
You: haha no worries its fine
You: xD
Stranger: its weirdyoure not askin me questions
You: haha what questions should i be asking?
Stranger: i dont know
Stranger: usually girls would ask you stuff
Stranger: but i like you
Stranger: youre different
You: lmao haha yea im not the same as anyone xD
You: well hopefully im not o.o
Stranger: hey am i makin you fall in love
You: i dont fall in love within minutes haha
Stranger: for such things
Stranger: i am sayin
Stranger: oh i see
You:
Stranger: i thought i was
Stranger: cause thats what im tryin to do
You: haha
Stranger: i really like you
You: well no kidding i like this conversation and all
You: that doesnt mean im in love haha
Stranger: i never felt this way before
Stranger: so i guess this is goodbye
You: are you pulling my leg? o.O
You: why’s it goodbye? O_o
Stranger: because this conversatiion is going to be nothing after all
Stranger: okay
You: no way silly
Stranger: so good bye
You: hey hold on
You: you dont just leave me that quick
You: haha
Stranger: saying that means you like me back
You: course i like you haha
Stranger: really?
Stranger: by like do you mean love?
Stranger: i hope so
You: no
You: you dont love that quick
Stranger: maybe when we graduate
Stranger: ill come to your castle
Stranger: and rescue you
You: hahaha wait wait
Stranger: so we can be together
You: i dont have a castle haha
Stranger: think of us as a fairytale
You: lmao
Stranger: that way you have a castle
You: hey hold on listen to me for a sec
Stranger: okay
You: make friends before love
You: that make sense to you?
Stranger: what do you mean
You: well
You: you should be friends before anything like love happens
Stranger: hey this isthe longest conversation i have ever had
Stranger: in this omegle thing
You: haha great
Stranger: i know you might be scared
You: i’m not scared o.O
Stranger: but can you show me your picturre
Stranger: i like to think of you
Stranger: im not scammer
Stranger: or stalker
You: lmao
Stranger: i wont hurt you
You: how about you show me your picture?
Stranger: im tellin the truth
Stranger: please believe me
Stranger: ive never felt the same way before really
You: lol
Stranger: okay ill show you
You: theres other girls out there that will make you feel the same way
Stranger: but will you show me yours
You: lol maybe
You: how am i gunna show you anyway though?
Stranger: wait
You: hm?
Stranger: okay
Stranger: o have to go
Stranger: I LOVE YOU
You: haha
Stranger: REMEMBER THAT
You: bye then nice meeting you
You: haha alright
Stranger: YOU TOO
You: have a good life
You: hope you find a good girl to love
Stranger: PLEASE DONT TELL ME THAT
Stranger: IT HURTS ME
You: o.O
Stranger: TO SAY YOURE NOT THAT PERFECT GIRL
Stranger: OKAY
You: lol
Stranger: THIS IS REALLY GOODBYE
You: bye then
You: haha
Stranger: I LOVE YOU………..
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 11th, 2010 at 8:19 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Im soo horny.
Stranger: asl
You: 18 f California
Stranger: 22 male missouri
You: nice
Stranger: well lets do it
You: Ok
You: I take my rhino out of his cage.
You: It stomps twice to show that this is his territory.
Stranger: \ok
You: It charges.
You: You are flung into a nearby tree
You: Critical hit!
You: -7 HP
You: Turned on yet?
Stranger: no not yet
Stranger: i need
You: Hmm..
Stranger: somethin better
You: My Rhino returns to me.
Stranger: like get me horny
You: I feed it Potion of the Goat
Stranger: talk 2 me horny
You: +5 attack
You: It charges again.
You: Critical hit!
You: -15 HP
You: You have been impaled with my Rhinos horn.
You: My Rhino returns to me,
Stranger: i dnt get it
You: you are lifeless.
You: Wow that was so hot.
You: Thanks.
You: I really needed that.
Stranger: lets get it down
Stranger: plz
You: Mmm i dont think I can anymore.
You: After that,
You: im just so exhausted.
Stranger: come on
Stranger: hey my cousin
Stranger: wants 2 kno
Stranger: if u can give him some
You: My Rhino is pretty warn out..
You: but I can ask..
You: My Rhino awakens.
You: He says he will do what he can.
You: My Rhino charges your cousin.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 12th, 2010 at 4:13 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: YOU
Stranger: me?
You: yes YOU
Stranger: hello
Stranger: what do you want?
You: dont you DARE say hello to m
You: e
You: you pesent
You: how DARE you talk like that to me
Stranger: so what do you want me to say?
Stranger: who are you?
Stranger: haha
You: i am the queen
Stranger: of?
You: show some respect
You: of EVERYTHING
Stranger: haha
Stranger: ok
Stranger: respect
You: thats more like it
Stranger: bueno
You: bueno yourself
Stranger: thanks
You: no problemo chump
Stranger: you chump!
Stranger: queen of the chump
You: and im allowed to call you a chump becuase im the queen of EVERYTHING but chumos
You: chumps
Stranger: i don’t think so
Stranger: you’re a chump
You: :O
You: how DARE you talk to me like that
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 12th, 2010 at 8:31 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
You: wanna be my friend?
Stranger: already am
You: ok good .
Stranger: cool
You: how are you best friend?
Stranger: im fine and u best friend?
You: im good . thanks for asking buddy.
Stranger: oh no problem
March 19th, 2010 at 2:44 pm
You: ih
Stranger: hi
You: are you how
Stranger: do you speak english?…
You: english i speak
Stranger: what nationality are you?
You: Netherlands from im
Stranger: ew, wtf.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 21st, 2010 at 5:42 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: money over bitches.
Stranger: fuck bitches get money
You: truth
Stranger: preach
You have disconnected.
March 21st, 2010 at 9:22 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: wanna play pokemon
Stranger: yes
You: ok!
You: i choose a level 63 marowak!
You: no!
You: i switched
Stranger: !!
You: to a level 5 magikarp!
Stranger: Then I will use
You: he uses *splash*
You: this attack has no effect
You: ha!
Stranger: A magikard as well
You: -0 HP!
Stranger: SPLAH BATTLE
You: *splash*
Stranger: *SPLASH
You: *splash*
Stranger: *splash*
You: *splash*
Stranger: *splash*
You: *splash*
Stranger: *splash*
You: *SPLASH!*
Stranger: You win
You: mice!
You: what do i win!
Stranger: A RARE CANDY
You: *magikarp +1 level*
You: yipee!
You: neato!
You: gee willikers!
Stranger: !!!
You: my magikarp just learned a new move!
Stranger: WHAT IS IT
You: New Move-Splash!
You: yay!
Stranger: Yay
You: now i can beat you
Stranger: again
You: i choose magikarp!
You: level 6!
Stranger: Oh no
You: oh yeah.
Stranger: I choose KAKUNA
Stranger: Use Harden!
You: OOOOOH!
You: *splash*
Stranger: *harden*
You: your defense is lowered -1!
You: aw you used harden
You: your defense is raised +1
You: *splash*
Stranger: I only know harden
You: your defense is lowered -1!
Stranger:
You: your turn
Stranger: My harden is out of PP!
You: here-
You: PP UP
Stranger: *harden
You: your defense is raised +1
You: *splash*
You: your defense is lowered -1!
You: aha!
Stranger: *self destruct*
You: what now
Stranger: BOON
You: are you dead?
Stranger: M
Stranger: yes
You: you mean boom.
You: not boonm
You: wait
You: is my cock a kakuna since all it knows is harden…?
Stranger: MY GOD
Stranger: It must be
You: whoa!
You: weird!
Stranger: mine too !
You: im a genius!
You: lets rub cocks!
Stranger: Does it know STRING SHOT
You: (NO HOMO)
You: nah man
You: it knows splash
You: and solarbeam
Stranger: Huzzah
You: chyeah
You: cockfight
You: ready?
You: GO!
You: *cock*
Stranger: OKAY
Stranger: *cock*
You: tie
Stranger: ohoho
You: we tied up our cocks
You: no homo
Stranger: no homo indeed
You: my balls just learned a new move!
Stranger: What is it!?
You: uhh
You: you really wanna know
You: once you know i have to use it against you
Stranger: I must know
You: ok
You: they learned metronome!
Stranger: !!!
You: yeah!
Stranger: I dont stand a chance
You: my cock used *harden*
Stranger: I only know harden and string shot
You: o noez!
You: my balls are using hydro pump!
You: look out!
Stranger: *dodges*
You: phew
You: good one bruh
You: that was close
Stranger: almost hit me
You: you were an asian dick away from being hit
Stranger: rofl
You: *wipes sweat from forehead and says phew*
You: anyway
You: wanna play yu gi oh
You: thats what the real ballers play
Stranger: does that involve dicks too
You: you wanna be a real baller?
You: OF COURSE IT INVOLVES DICKS
You: gosh!
You: are you gay or something?
Stranger: I want to be a baller
You: damn you are a baller
You: youre gangster for saying you wanna suck on ballers
You: *be a baller
You: rofl
You: anyway
Stranger: oh god
You: i choose yu gi
You: no homo
Stranger: I choooooose
You: YOU!
You: sorry im getting sucked in
You: haha sucked
You: like a penis
Stranger: lolololol
You: lolol
You: yo bro
You: ever get a z-job?
Stranger: a what?
You: a z-job
Stranger: I dont know what that is >.>
You: ah forget it…if you dont know what it is you cant afford it
Stranger:
You: rofl
You: peace bro no homo
You have disconnected.
March 26th, 2010 at 3:07 pm
HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
March 27th, 2010 at 9:37 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ur lame
Stranger: you are
You: somebodys gay?
Stranger: you are
You: somebodys gay?
Stranger: yea
You: somebodys gay?
Stranger: yea
You: haha fag!
You: anyway what up
Stranger: that was retarded
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 28th, 2010 at 8:25 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: i smoke weed
Stranger: yeah bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 28th, 2010 at 11:21 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: bonjour
Stranger: am looking for a female 2 talk 2
You: same
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 29th, 2010 at 6:46 pm
Stranger: RON?
You: HARRY!?
Stranger: I FOUND YOU AT LAST!
You: FINALLY!!
Stranger:
You: Ive been so lost without you Harry.
Stranger: as have i ronald. as have i.
Stranger: i was worried terrible the death eaters had got you.
Stranger: that you were lost forever.
Stranger: </3
You: I was worried the he who must not be named got his sweet revenge after all of these years
Stranger: i know. its a great fear i have. do worry. im strong.
You: I have faith in you.
Stranger: good. its all you will need.
You: how are things going with Snape, I know how he likes to ride your ass, jealous bastard.
Stranger: not so well im afraid. last time was rather painful. needed serious medical attention.
March 29th, 2010 at 8:03 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello, and welcome to the Jomegle Communications Platform.
Stranger: Please enter your username.
You: me jack off now?
Stranger: *** Your username must not contain any spaces (‘ ‘).
Stranger: Try again.
You: me jack off now?
Stranger: *** Your username must not contain any spaces (‘ ‘).
Stranger: Try again.
You: mejackoffnow
Stranger: *** You are now known as mejackoffnow
Stranger: You’re almost set! Please answer the following question:
Stranger: Twenty minus seven equals ?
You: uh 13
Stranger: That is incorrect. Try another.
Stranger: 87, forty, fifty nine, 63, 96 or thirty four: which of these is the largest?
You: my cock
Stranger: That is incorrect. Try another.
Stranger: The list Linda, Brian, face and chin contains how many body parts?
You: including brians cock, 3
Stranger: That is incorrect. Try another.
Stranger: What is Thomas’ name?
You: Sarah
Stranger: That is incorrect. Goodbye!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 30th, 2010 at 3:20 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: 8======================================================D
Stranger: …
You: …
Stranger: U r gay
You: You’re gayer for talking to me then aren’t you?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 30th, 2010 at 8:21 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey im a horny grl who wants someone to talk dirty to me
You: i love you
Stranger: ummm
You: oh you said dirty
You: ok
You: so im washing your laundry, and i DONT use tide stain remover
You: oooh sexy
You: this is getting hot
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 30th, 2010 at 8:29 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: asl
You: i love you
Stranger: aww me tooo
Stranger: asl?
You: 17 m usa
You: u?
Stranger: 16 f usa
You: good i was worried saying i love you could be gay
Stranger: wanna talk dirty?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
You: sure
You: so im washing laundry, and i DONT use tide stain remover
You: ohhh this is getting hot
You: your turn
You: go
You: im getting turned off
You: go
Stranger: i rub my vagina on ur clothes making them increasingly more dirty
You: i dont like dirty vaginas
You: thats repulsive
You: my penis just threw up
You: you dont know how to talk dirty do you
You: this is really lame
You: leave now
Stranger: ummm i believe u started by talking about TIDE
Stranger: i wasnt given much to work with hoebag
You: clitfaced chodebucket!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 30th, 2010 at 8:39 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: i love you
Stranger: asl
You: i/love/you
You: you?
Stranger: 15m us
You: yes!
You: a boy
You: heehehe
Stranger: asl?
You: 41 m canada
Stranger: you freak
You: why
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
March 31st, 2010 at 5:52 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: i lost the game
Your conversational partner has disconnected
April 1st, 2010 at 8:42 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: asl
You: so this one time i painted a squirrel
Stranger: k asl
You: whats asl
Stranger: age sex location
You: 17 and i like to fuck in hotels
Stranger: me 2
You: you know..that reminds me about that time i painted a squirrel
Stranger: did u fuck a squirrel in a hotel
You: NO! what do you think im a freak?!?
You: i painted it first
Stranger: yeah
You: yeah?
Stranger: did it like it’
You: wanna watch squirrel porn with me
Stranger: yes
Stranger: how did u know
You: the best is alvin and the chipmunks squirrel anal bangers XXX DVD #9
Stranger: do u have a squirrrl costum
You: ever seen it?
You: yes i do
Stranger: no
You: aw
You: ur missing out
You: i saw it in 3D
You: well it was in person..or should i saw in squirrel!!!
You: *say
Stranger: i have 1 u want to fuck with in a hotel with them on
You: painted of course?
Stranger: no
You: fag!
Stranger: jdklgjsdolfk diopfj klbn d fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu fucccckk uuuuuuuuuuuuu
You: you realize im a man right
Stranger: jkfhsdkl nfvherjfjsklfjsdlfdfjlsdkfj lsdkfj ioejhfonvcnsdk nhwefjkljfkojf hng jjjj
Stranger: man vagina
You: mangina
Stranger: pussy
You: *you
Stranger: jhkdf gkogdfjk dfjkg no u
You: im a pussy?
Stranger: nhjk jgjkdf
Stranger: yep and u fight like 1 2
You: you are what you eat you chodebucket
You: that means you eat buckets of chodes^
You: and you also fight like one
Stranger: no really dumb ass
You: *you
Stranger: dumb ass fucking bitch
You: *you
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
April 3rd, 2010 at 4:49 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: cybersex?m 19 usa asl?
You: *cockslap*
Stranger: ouch
You: *cockslap*
Stranger: ouch
You: *cockslap*
Stranger: stop
You: *cockslap*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
April 4th, 2010 at 9:52 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: PLEASE DONT TYPE IN CAPS
Stranger: OK I WONT
You: OK GOOD NOW ON TO BUSINESS
You: WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT BETWEEN 11 AND 12
Stranger: Having sex with this hot chick
You: ooh i like lesbians
You: wanna fuck?
Stranger: R u a guy!
You: no youre a girl
Stranger: R u a girl
You: no youre a girl
Stranger: No I’m not
You: yeah
You: then why did i just fuck you
You: *fuck*
You: that makes you gay
Stranger: No it doesn’t
You: yeah it does
You: how DOESNT it
Stranger: Your probably a pedophile
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
April 5th, 2010 at 5:21 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: YOUR LATE
Stranger: Am I ?
You: yes
You: you said you’d be on time
Stranger: I Apologiz…
You: how many times have I told you about this
You: I forgive you.
You: You got the boxes?
Stranger: Thanks
Stranger: I Do..
You: I’m gonna need those boxes.
Stranger: Right..
You: They contain ultra spy info I need by tuesday.
Stranger: rRight.Ill ake sure And get Them to You By Tuesday..
You: Thanks. Make sure theres no frogs in them this time.
Stranger: Haha Yeah sorry about that last time..
You: I couldn’t belive my eyes when I opened that box. That frog spewed right in my eye.
Stranger: Realy :O
Stranger: Sorry …
Stranger: Wont happen again..
You: I had to get some eyedrops. Then I met a man named carl and he lent me a tissue and everything was fine.
Stranger: Carl..?
You: Carl the gorilla man
Stranger: I know Him Well
You: He’s a reasonable man, a bit tall but whatever.
Stranger: Yeah I know..Its odd..
You: He always turns up when you least expect it
Stranger: I know..
Stranger: Hes sneaky Like That Man From mr Deed.s
You: Yeah…he scares me a bit. I fear him. And his pet hyena.
Stranger: His Pet hyena Is Very Frightful..
You: It bit me once. I had to be badgaed up and I looked like a zombie mummy type thing.
Stranger: Oh Sounds Bad..
You: Oh it was. I’ll never forget that day.
Stranger: I’ll Never forget The Day I Met Carl..
You: Me neither. He turned up in a red lorry the first time I saw him. Then we drove off into the sunset while eating peanut butter on toast.
Stranger: Yes..He Alwyas talks About Peanut Butter ?
You: I think he has a fetish for it.
Stranger: He also Has a Foot fetish I belive..
You: Yes…he’s strange like that.
You: Soooooo….I have to go and water my turtle now…but it has been a pleasure speaking to you …person.
Stranger: It has also Been a leasuer Speaking to You ..Person..
You: Say hi to carl for me.
Stranger: I must Go meet Carl
Stranger: I Shall..
You: Lol see ya.
Stranger: Byee :L
You have disconnected.
April 19th, 2010 at 12:43 pm
You: are u a wizard
how do you know you found myu throught identity
Stranger: no
Stranger: are you?
You: yes i am a wizard of how is that suck ass school called
You: eh….. hogwarts
You: yeah from hogwarts
You: do you belief me
Stranger: no. you cant be from hogwarts because its school there atm and no electricity works there.
Stranger:
You: but its magic electricy
You: i think
Stranger: of coooourse…
Stranger: youre rather from pigfarts.
You:
Stranger: thats because im batman
You: Batmam prove it
You: where that pedo kidd robin
Stranger: im the new batman, not the old 20th century batman.
Stranger: im the cool new one.
Stranger: i need no robin
You: i like the old one he was my buddy
You: the knew one bullies me on school
Stranger: ooooh… then youre the nerd i bully when im bored
Stranger: ?
You: im not the nerd im the cool one
You: i can prove it
You: i always have my calculator with me
You: you see al cool kids have that
Stranger: ooh, ok.
Stranger: so youre the cool nerd.
Stranger: sry.
You: its oke i dont care but my calculator is made
You: in secret he is a transformer
You: and he wants to kick some ass
Stranger: not mine.
You: to late he is already flying towards your house
Stranger: NO!
Stranger: welll… ill have to get my army of bumblebees then.
Stranger: they will kill him.
You: what that really sucks
You: eh….. then i have eh…..
You: my toilet transformer
You: and he will also kick some ass
Stranger: my teddy bear will eat him
You: youre wright you wine
You: win
You: do you want a ribbon
You: or a cookie
You: you can choose
Stranger: of course a cookie
Stranger: what should i do with a ribbon?
You: yeah i ate the cookies
You: we only have ribbons
Stranger: then i want a ribbon
Stranger: they taste not bad either
You: i also ate the ribbons i was really hungry
Stranger: kinda salty
You: i know
Stranger: yeah i understand
Stranger: good.
Stranger: well.
Stranger: then my bumblebees will kill you too.
You: what….
You: they wil never find the box i live in
You: I am in secret a hobo wizard
Stranger: my teddybear has a GPS navigation system
Stranger: he will find you
Stranger: and then he will eat all your fingers.
Stranger: one after another
Stranger: and then he will destroy your home and kill your family
You: what my family nooooo not my family of cookies
You: eat my fingers eat my cereal box but not my cookies
Stranger: okay.
Stranger: ill eat both.
Stranger: and then my bumblebees eat your eyes
Stranger: so you dont see when i also eat your cookies
Stranger: haha!
You: hehehe luckily you dont know the cookies are poisend
Stranger: oh man…
You: shit i just told you
Stranger: i die.
Stranger: please.
Stranger: aaaah.
Stranger: i die
You: wai
Stranger: oh.
Stranger: these cookies
Stranger: aaaaah!
You: i have a cure
Stranger: give it!
Stranger: pleeeeeeease!
You: o wait sorry just ate was hungry
Stranger: maaan.
Stranger: no ill die.
Stranger: before i die
Stranger: i have to shut down my pc
Stranger: so bye
You: you can use my cereal box as a grave stone
You: by
May 11th, 2010 at 5:51 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hey
Stranger: asl
You: 25 female thailand
Stranger: cool
Stranger: wanna trade pics
You: i sad
Stranger: y
You: tongpo, he rape me
Stranger: you ok
You: i very sad
You: knocksucow is going to kick his ass
Stranger: he better
You: now kiki even too
Stranger: can i see wat you look like
You: no
May 22nd, 2010 at 11:06 pm
hahahahahahahaha i made this epic by being dull
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hey babe!
You: hi
You: asl
Stranger: 17 f us
Stranger: You?
You: 16 m canada
Stranger: Cool.
Stranger: So
Stranger: whats up?
You: nm u?
Stranger: Nothing really, just bored and looking for something to do
You: ya
You: it is late lol
Stranger:
You:
You: so
Stranger: SOO
Stranger: Haha
Stranger: what do you wanna do?
You: cant do much on this text thing
You: only type lol
Stranger: yup…:)
You: so wut do we do
You: all u can really do is talk
Stranger: Well cutie what do you want to talk about? Haha
You: uhmm
You: lol
You: idk really
Stranger: GOD. YOU ARE SO DULL. OBVIOUSLY I WANT TO CHATSEX WITH YOU. NEXT TIME, TAKE A FUCKING HINT!
May 27th, 2010 at 12:34 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: heyyyyyyo
Stranger: hiii (:
You: asl?
Stranger: 19 f usa
You: whats up baby gurl im 20 m us where you at in the states
Stranger: Pennsylvania.
You: PA is for pussies no homo
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: where are you from?
You: Colorado
You: whachu know bout that
Stranger: hahaha…interesting.
You: so you get into freaky role play on here or what?
Stranger: eh, i do like cyber and stuff on here sometimes.
You: just winderin im kinda new to this random convo thing
You: so what is ur ideal man
Stranger: outgoing. funny. caring. friendly. have stuff in common. just really awesome. haha.
You: damn id go gay for that dude no joke
Stranger: hahahaha
You: hehe
You: no but thats cool what PA like i havent made it anyfarther east than like kansas
Stranger: it’s alright, it’s been super hot lately…like ridiculous. hahaha.
You: it just snowed here this week and the mountains are covered you gotta loove the us
Stranger: ohhh for sure. i’ve never been out that far…the farthest west i’ve been is Missouri.
You: well we both sound like we are pretty isolated then id say
Stranger: lol i guess so!
Stranger: we need to get out more
You: i hear that
You: so are you in college or just chillin
Stranger: collllllege.
Stranger: but i’m home for the summer.
You: o ok thats cool what are you studyin?
Stranger: i’m just general right now. haven’t picked one.
You: thats cool choosin a major is definetly something you dant wanna rush
You: serious life decision and all that
Stranger: yeah, definitely.
You: well what do you like to do
Stranger: hang out with friends, go to concerts, listen to music, drive around, just have fun in any way (: you
You: same whats ur favorite music song band genre whatever
Stranger: i love rock type stuff. hardcore. indie. acoustic. and some rap and pop. my favorite bands right now are Say Anything and As Cities Burn.
You: hmm never heard of either of them so i guess they must be good
Stranger: they’re good. they just aren’t hugely popular and all over the radio.
You: thats what i mean most of the radio is garbage and it usually the bands nobody hears about that are acutually talented
Stranger: mmhmm (:
Stranger: what’s your favorite…genre, band, whatever.
You: i like a lot of stuff defiently not a country fan
You: at the moment ive been exploring the moody blues but i usually blast some dre or neil young or rolling stones or matisyahu or all sorts of stuff reggea, rock rap, elcectronic, classic shit and anything my ear likes
Stranger: that’s really cool (:
You: not that i only have one
You: alright you dont have to answer this question if you dont like but whats your wildest fantasy
Stranger: haha, i really wanna have sex on a beach. horribly. it’s kinda ridiculous.
You: shit we all do
Stranger: hahahah i guess so.
You: like what is sexier than gettin down on a beach feelin the sand and each other
Stranger: very true.
You: you should major in sexology
You: i dont even think its a real word bu o wel
Stranger: hahahaha, that would be interesting. and your homework assignment…to have sex. yes. please.
You: damn id be down to help you study
Stranger: hahaha. good (;
Stranger: i’m really horny right now…maybe we shouldn’t be talking about this. hahaha
You: try being a guy is like the switch is always in the on position from like 17 to 22
You: loll
Stranger: hahahaha.
Stranger: i’ve been hornier than usual lately. hahahaha.
You: ?and why is that
Stranger: lack of sex life right now. haha.
You: well you gotta realse ur energy somewhere
Stranger: hahaha..let’s just masturbation has become a good friend in the past week. hahaha.
You: oooo o are you a squirter???
Stranger: hahaha, yes.
You: shitttttt
You: tttttt
You: ttttttt
Stranger: is that good or bad? lol
You: sexiest thing i could imagine
You: girks who squirt just seem to have really intense orgasms and way more fun fuckin
Stranger: (;
You: damn you sound sexy
Stranger: 5’7″….brown hair…blue eyes…not super skinny but not fat just average….42C chest. holllllaaa(; hahaha
You: mmm
You: id be on that like a hobo on a ham sandwich
Stranger: lol. what do you look like?
You: im 6’1″ brown shaggy hair pretty athletic and you know i got the goods
Stranger: mmm sounds hot (; i’d love for that to be on me (; hahaha
You: i garuntte i could get you off with one finger
Stranger: sexy (;
You: are you gettin wet cuz im pretty damn excited
Stranger: i am extremely wet. hahaha.
You: damn were just two freaks trying to get by
Stranger: haha guess so (;
You: i dont really wanna roleplay but im down from some dirty talk cuz im soooo horny
Stranger: i’m down (;
You: what are you imagining right now?
Stranger: you eating me out.
You: mmmm you taste like sweet fruit
Stranger: mmmm. it feels so good (;
You: i want to grind with you so bad
Stranger: hehe. i want to fuck you horribly. horribly. hahaha…and by horribly…i mean HORRIBLY. hahaha.
You: ooooo i want to get deep inside you and explore your body
Stranger: mmmmm.
You: i think i just jizzed in my pants
Stranger: hahaha. (;
You: sorry i try to keep it sexy but i cant help it sometime
You: but for real i just want to caress you body
Stranger: haha, i wouldn’t mind it
You: you do anal?
Stranger: no, i’ve never tried.
You: curious or not cool?
Stranger: i haven’t decided yet. haha
You: well i would bevery gentle and let you get ontop so you can control
Stranger: i have a feeling that i’d be pretty attracted to you, so i’d be like lets just fucking do it. hahaha
You: o baby i would really give it to you
Stranger: hehe, maybe i like it rough (;
You: uhh oo
You: i love good girls who are just straight up naughty
Stranger: hehe (; …how does this sound?…i straddle your stomach and use your hand to rub my clit….and when i cum all over your hand and stomach and lick it off? (;
You: speechless
You: i wanna feel you soft lips around my raging dick right now so bad
Stranger: hehe. i would love to ride you, or suck you, or give you a handjob, whatever (;
You: i want to give you multiples for hours on end
Stranger: mmmm so hot. (;
Stranger: when you’re eating me out, i’d grab your hair, and push your face into it because it feels amazing.
You: ooooooooooooooo o o oooo
You: fuck yeah
You: i want to slap your ass and pound you dripping cunt
Stranger: mmm sexy (; ….can you get in my bed NOW? hehe
You: shit i already am you better be
You: haha
Stranger: it sounds like we’d have a pretty naughty time (;
You: i think our sexual energies are just perfectly aligned or something
Stranger: hahaha, i know right?!
You: im just imaging us 69ing while you squirt in my face
Stranger: mmm. and when you cum, i would love to swallow it (;
You: ive got a hot load waiting for you
Stranger: mmmmm i’d love to take it.
You: god dAMN
You: i wanna slap your clit with my balls
Stranger: mmmm that would feel amazing.
You: i love the way your pussy squeezes my dick when you squirt
Stranger: hehehe. i love your dick inside of me. it feels amazing.
You: call me daddy and tell me how bad you want it
Stranger: mmm daddy, i want it so fucking bad, i want you to fuck me hard. (;
You: baby you got my dick so swollen it looks like a bee just stung it
You: are you goin manual or dildo vibrator whatsup
Stranger: using my fingers.
You: fuck yeah
Stranger: (; it’s so fun.
Stranger: so how big are you?
You: right now id say 7 in and hard as a rock
You: i wanna use it on you so bad
Stranger: hehe, i would love that.
You: i wanna hear you moan
Stranger: i would moan and scream your name (;
You: i wanna slip in and out of you and hit your g spot
Stranger: mmmmm
You: tell me how bad you want my cum
Stranger: so fucking bad. i want you to cum all over me.
You: i wanna gag you with it and cum in your throat
Stranger: mmm, bring it (;
You: oh my god im gonna explode
Stranger: hehe, (;
You: ooo are you gettin up there yet i need to slow down abit
Stranger: i am definitely about to cum.
You: i wanna hear you scream and squirt
Stranger: mmmmmmmm fuck.
You: just feel my fat dick deep in you while our boddies rub
Stranger: mmmm shiit. i just came. that felt so damn good.
You: oh my god im almost there keep talkin drity baby
Stranger: hehe, i’d love to lick the tip of your dick innocently and slowly a few times…before wrapping my mouth around it and taking it in…inch by inch slowly.
You: how much can you fit
Stranger: all of it.
Stranger: deep throat you. (;
You: i want ti hear you choke on it while you rob my balls
Stranger: hehehe. i would then take my mouth to the tip and suck…and use my hand and stroke you (:
You: yes babe i want to fuck you against the wall in the shower
You: you think you can get off again?
Stranger: yeah.
You: ohhh yes
You: i would back you up against the wall and tear you up
Stranger: hehe sounds fun (;
You: and then grab your hair and go into overdrive
Stranger: mmmm yes fuck me so hard.
You: i love your sweet little cunt
Stranger: hehehe (;
You: id turn the shower on to make it extra steamy and bite you playfully
Stranger: hehehe, how’d you know i like biting? (;
You: energies pefectly in sync next id pull out and lick your crack all the way
Stranger: mmmm
You: id use my tounge to lick your dripping lips
Stranger: mmmmm
Stranger: fuck.
You: oh shit
You: you gotta ride me if want my cum babe
Stranger: hehe, i get on top of you and ride you slowly at first, and picking up pace (;
You: i love it slow
Stranger: then, i’ll ride it slow. (;
You: i love to watch that ass bounce
Stranger: mmm i just love you in me.
You: how hot are you right now
Stranger: extremely.
You: fuck my dick couldnt get any harder ride me in a circle
Stranger: hehe, okay (; ……i ride you in a circle, and moan your name extremely loud while doing it. feel my juices and stuff dripping down your dick.
You: FUCK
You: i wanna make you my creampie baby
Stranger: hehe.
You: oh my god here it cum let me hera you scream
Stranger: mmm i would scream your name so loudly (;
You: o fuck im almost there
Stranger: just picture me riding it slowly still, moaning your name,
You: i love the way your pussy wraps around my cock
Stranger: mmmmm goood (;
You: o you feel so goood
Stranger: mmm fuck you feel so good in me
You: ur so naughty
Stranger: oh well…so are you (;
You: i wanna feel you cum again
Stranger: hehehe, i’m so worn out (;
You: one more for me baby
Stranger: hehehe okayyy
You: here it cums babe
Stranger: mmmmm. i want you inside of me so bad.
You: oh god
Stranger: (:
You: o my god i just came so hard inside you
Stranger: mmmmmm fuck.
You: fuck you still goin?
Stranger: hehe, i’m going to cum again. i’m going for my second time.
You: lemme help you out then
You: aftre i cum in you i take by dick and slap it on your clit
Stranger: MMMM
You: then i rub your lips with just the tip
Stranger: mmm that feels so good.
You: your literally dripping wet and i start to fuck you with just my pinky
You: i start to go faster and deeper each time
Stranger: mmmmmm fuck.
You: the i use two fingers to really get you goin while i rub your hood witj my other hand
You: i wanna see you squirt again
Stranger: mmmmm fuck, shiiiit.
You: then i lay you on your stomach and give you the shocker while i whisper in your ear how sexy you are
You: your so damn fine
Stranger: mmmm
You: how do you want it
Stranger: get on my back, stick your dick in my pussy and fuck the shit out of me.
Stranger: get me*
You: ohh ya
You: i want you to stick ur ass out so i can go deeper
Stranger: mmmmm okay
You: ill smash you so hard youll never recover babe
Stranger: oh fucking well.
You: jk you might recover eventually
You: baby you got that good good
Stranger: mmmmm fuck, i just came.
Stranger: shiiiiit.
Stranger: you’re really good at this.
You: i wish this wasnt omegle and i show you some real tricks
Stranger: hehehe. that would be nice.
You: your probably the dirtiest talker ive ever heard and i love it
Stranger: hehehe (; oh i try
You: honestly i had no intentions of messing arpund with you but it just happned naturalyy
You: you just sound so sexy
Stranger: hahah. thank you?
You: is it cool if i pass out now?
Stranger: yes.
You: haha jk
You: i wish i could have multiples ur damn lucky
Stranger: loll
You: ur legs feel like jelo?
Stranger: hahah, i sorta feel like i’m on ecstasy right now or something, hahaha, i feel so damn good.
You: mmm natural high
You: you should try fuckin on weed you will forget you have a body
Stranger: i have heard that having sex while high is amazing.
You: makes that feel like a motor scotter when you could be riding in a ferrari
Stranger: hahah
You: not to be weird but ill probably dream about you tonight you dirty girl
Stranger: hehehe.
Stranger: it’s fine.
You: cool well im outta here keep up that hot shit up and find a man who takes good care of you other than that have a awesome life and good luck in college
Stranger: hahah, alright. have a good life too. (:
You: later babe
June 6th, 2010 at 2:36 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: im not retarded are you?
Stranger: nope
You: im not retarded are you?
Stranger: Why do you ask?
You: im not retarded are you?
Stranger: fuck off troll
You: retard leaving?
Stranger: I shall stop stead you’re beating heart and crack the warmth from your bones
Stranger: so says the cDc
Stranger: you are fucked boy
You: retard fuckin?
Stranger: Don’t start you’re computer tomorrow
You: retard fuckin?
Stranger: if you want to be picked up by the fbi, go ahead
You: retard trolling?
Stranger: Also, Tell you’re Friend, lets see, Tom that his pc is FUCKED as well
Stranger: cdc forever
You: aww retard left
June 9th, 2010 at 12:11 am
Stranger: hii
You: hi
Stranger: 19 m
Stranger: you?
You: 1.73 m
You: 173 in cm
Stranger: will you talk like a girl?
Stranger: and make me cum?
You: erm… no but i’m sure ur mom can help with that.
Stranger: true!
Stranger: ill go ask right now
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 10th, 2010 at 2:18 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: I have a boner.
You: Nice, me too
Stranger: asl?
You: 63, male, texas.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 10th, 2010 at 10:46 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: m/f
You: there seems to be a certain time all the horny dudes come online
You: you guys all share the same shedule it seems
Stranger: do u like blues thing
You: and what does that mean
You: are you cupping your testicles right now?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 12th, 2010 at 10:54 pm
Stranger: Yo
You: hey asl?
Stranger: over 18, either gender, anywhere but metal factories.
You: oh im 75/m/naked
Stranger: so you like 75 year old men and their location being naked? where is that?
You: joke killer!…you murdered a poor innocent joke!
You: how could you!
Stranger: i did not. :O
Stranger: it raped my father.
Stranger: seriously, look at my pool deck.
Stranger: the bloodstains are still there.
You: im so sorry i never knew!
Stranger: Thats right. you didnt.
Stranger: YOU BASTARD!
Stranger: so how do you feel about panties?
You: they are too tight
Stranger: i see.
Stranger: did you try wearing them on your head?
You: yes…why is there a problem?
Stranger: no, just making sure you did it properly.
Stranger: hmm. dunno then.
You: okey…good
Stranger: maybe you should visit a mistress, might deflat it a little if its an ego issue.
You: your probaley right, know any?
Stranger: only skeletons..
You: awesome i got heroin
Stranger: i have authority issues.
You: i have drug problems
Stranger: great! lets join the government!
You: ill be the crackhead prime minister and you be the scandalous president
Stranger: bleh…the president is stupid. ill take the janitor. ill hear more gossip to blackmail with.;
You: then ill be stalker who kills 7 people and lears in the end that i was wrong so i kill Justin Bieber
Stranger: k. lets do it. whatll we call ourselves?
You: the supa lemon savers pretige 1 heros squad task force 141
Stranger: the CCC? contingency crustacean core?
Stranger: i like it,
Stranger: .*
You: the SLSP1HSTF141
Stranger: it loses flavor when shortened..
You: u got a point…so when is the first official supa lemon savers pretige 1 heros squad task force 141 meeting?
Stranger: next week. ive got people to screw this one.
Stranger: in fact, ones giving me a blow job right now. Say hi!
You: hi!
Stranger: Hi.
You: is he mexican?
You: or a jew?
Stranger: no. i dont know what he is..
Stranger: dont care, its a …something
You: hes probaley a haitian mexican jew born in japan
Stranger: oh, hes irish.
You: thats why hes drunk
Stranger: he isnt drunk yet, its too easy on him that way
You: i see…
Stranger: ahaaahahahahhahhahahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…that was a nice relief.
Stranger: should i send him over to your place next?
You: no let the russian maufia have him next. i owe them a favor
Stranger: they told me the next time i try to send one of my bitches over theyd shoot my goldfish. they cant shoot trent.
Stranger: trent will turn into a monster if they shoot him.
Stranger: you dont want to see trent going around fish-slapping the fuck out of mafia bosses…its too funny. they die laughing.
You: okey ill have to give them alejandro…the jackrabbit from iceland
Stranger: iceland..where the suns always shining and not burning up enough grass.
You: yepper. and where they make waffles the size of johannesburg
Stranger: then why dont i see them?
You: there in area 3.1415926
Stranger: i should still see them. i mean, johannesburg is a planet isnt it
Stranger: our planet<johannesburg in size
You: its invisble though…
Stranger: …well, yes, but i ran into it going to pluto. alot.
You: i know i tried to go to mickey mouse's house but i keep getting hit
Stranger: why go to his house?
Stranger: just tell him you have whipped cheese. he comes over in a heartbeat
You: what kind of cheese?
Stranger: whipped.
You: flavor?
Stranger: whipped.
You: texture?
Stranger: ITS JUST WHIPPED CHEESE DAMMIT!
You: okey…ill get him that next time
Stranger: good.
You: speaking of whipped i found trent floppig on the flor
Stranger: …he gets around still.
Stranger: hes a pimp daddy gold fish.
You: well then whats the guys name behind him?
Stranger: no idea. maybe its that bodyguard he was talking bout..
You: really?… it looks like t-pain or sandra bullock…i cant tell
Stranger: well, he did say they were well known
You: maybe its kate gosselin
You: wait it cant be…therd be a trail of monster killing fans behind her
Stranger: not if they killed off each other
You: i see…im going to have to call in the russian mafia to figuere this out
Stranger: ask for kate. shes always good.
You: why dont i ask jon…he has the better judgement of the 2
Stranger: because kate can take more.
You: okey!…(yells back) KATE! get your AK-47 ready!
Stranger: i concede.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 15th, 2010 at 3:17 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: How many licks does it take to get to the center of a toosie pop?? :O
You: wait
You: i know this one
You: 457
Stranger: Reallyy ?! :O
Stranger: Lol
You: yeah
Stranger: Hahaha, Female or male?
You: or something
You: black
You: from mexico
You: im hindu
You: nah jk
You: im jewish
Stranger: Your a black hindu, who lives in mexico, and is now jewish
Stranger: lol
Stranger: Can i know your gender??
You: yeah
Stranger: lol
You: BLACK
Stranger: Penis or Vagina?!
Stranger: lol
You: B L A C K
You: what can be black
You: lolz ?
Stranger: Both
Stranger: lol
Stranger: ??
You: no?
Stranger: then i wouldnt know
Stranger: inform me
You: only dick is black
You: vagina is kinda pinkish
Stranger: so your penis is black??
You: no
You: my vagina is
Stranger: so your a trangender??
Stranger: transgender
Stranger: ….
You: im black
Stranger: And im confused
Stranger: lol
You: why ??
Stranger: Because i don’t know who you are!? -___-
Stranger: Pretty pleaseeee
You: im from mexico
Stranger: with a cherry on top
Stranger: tell me
You: what ?
Stranger: Nevermind…lets see…
Stranger: How old are you?
Stranger: :O
Stranger: Be honest!
You: im jewish
Stranger: >.<
Stranger: I'm going to leave you now…. :'(
You: why ?
You: your not even with me
You: so..
Stranger: asshole
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 18th, 2010 at 9:29 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hiya
Stranger: m/f??
You: asl sounds like asshole doesn’t it?
You: hi
Stranger: m/f??
You: what did you just call me??
Stranger: i asked dat r u male or female
You: r u?
Stranger: ??
Stranger: wat
Stranger: wat sex r u havin??
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
June 28th, 2010 at 11:40 am
Retard hating ratard -
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: heyyyyyyo
Stranger: oyyyyyeh
You: asl
Stranger: abc
You: ???
Stranger: herp derp
You: retard
Stranger: no u
You: are you making fun of retared people
Stranger: are you?
You: Yeah it it fun
Stranger: they honestly shouldn’t exist
You: right
You: the make like suck
Stranger: yes like suck
You: life*
You: im retarded for doing htat
You: that* ufck me
Stranger: you shouldn’t exist
You: fuck
Stranger: indeed
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
July 10th, 2010 at 5:09 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: someone called me an asshole
Stranger: and she was right
Stranger: im an asshole man
You: and im a nostril
Stranger: yeah
August 1st, 2010 at 12:59 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: dad?
Stranger: yes?
You: why did you leave me, dad?
You: why did you leave mom??????
Stranger: cause you guys were bicthes
You: but mom loves you!
You: i love you!
Stranger: yeah i dont care about love. i dont care about you guys
You: where r u dad?
Stranger: im at my strip club
You: is it because of holly?
You: is that why you left??????
Stranger: yes
You: but… but… shes a man!!!!!!!!
Stranger: hahah
Stranger: well so are you!
You: no! i had a sex change, dad!
You: im now a woman!
Stranger: we’ve all been there sweety
You:
Stranger: oh come one cheer up
Stranger: not getting any?
You: you weren’t there when i first had sex…
You: why ar eyou so cruel dad??????????????
Stranger: cause it never happened. no one wants you!
Stranger: no one loves you!
You: but dad.
You: you love me, right??????
Stranger: uhhhhh no.
You: I HATE YOU!!!!!!
Stranger: i thought i made myself clear when i said no one loves you!!!!
Stranger: well I DETEST YOU
You: i… i hate you!!!!!
You: you irk me!
You: bye!
You have disconnected.
—–
You: dad? is that you?
Stranger: hii
Stranger: no
You: oh.
Stranger: f??
You:
You: yes’
Stranger: ur age???
You: 8
You: i am eight
Stranger: wats that…
You: you?
Stranger: 20
You: i am 8 yrs old
You: cool
Stranger: u r from???
You: so… whats masturbating?
You: ppl keep talking about thta but idk what it is
Stranger: its u piss penis..
You: also whats horny?
You: what does being horny mean?
Stranger: to fuck very much…eager
You: so horny means cussing alot?
Stranger: u know pussy??
You: like the cat?
Stranger: no fucking too much
You: and masturbating means peeing?
You: fucking… its a bad word
Stranger: yaa
Stranger: u know chut…or pussy
You: chut?
You: oh like girls private parts?
Stranger: pussy??
Stranger: yaa that hole…
You: i like this girl at school
You: named kelly
You: she showed me it once
Stranger: how was that??
You: my thingy then shot up
Stranger: u r from??
You: what does that mean?
Stranger: which country??
You: i am from america
Stranger: okk…
Stranger: u wanna sex
You: oh.
You: whats sex?
Stranger: to fuck
Stranger: cummon
You: sorry. my friends say im naive
You: or something like that
Stranger: means wat???
You: like they say im dumb and stuff
Stranger: r u wearing panty???
You: im a boy
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
August 9th, 2010 at 3:15 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: HIIIIII\
Stranger: Sup ‘namean?
Stranger: Yamsayin?
You: I NO SPEAK ENGLISHHHS
You: I CHINESE
You: CUM TO KILL U
Stranger: Oh well that’s wassup
Stranger: Yeah I know.
Stranger: Mawfucka
You: KILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILKILLKILLKIILV
You: DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Stranger: This is exactly why I hate Asians.
You: FUCK YOU MOTEHE FUCKER BITCH DADDY O
Stranger: You are hip.
Stranger: Yo.
You: FUCKCUFUFF YOU
Stranger: Rude.
You: I KILL YOUR PESIDNET REGAN
Stranger: You’re just bitter because of your small penis.
You: I AM FEMALE YOU FUCK ME I KILL
You: GO FUCK YOURSELF
Stranger: Hey dumbass clintons the president now.
You: YOU R SPY FOR US I KILL SPY
Stranger: I like stoopid
You: DIE DADDY-O
Stranger: I love you Asian lady.
Stranger: You sucky sucky?
You: POOP YOU
Stranger: I give five dorrra?
You: I NOT RUSSSIAN I AM PRUD CHINESE I LIVE IN HONGG KONG
You: I KILL SPY FOR AMERICA
Stranger: Hong Kong is in Japan, silly.
You: YOU LIE YOU STOOPID AMERIEN
You: I KILL YOU AND PRESIDENT REAGAN
Stranger: You’re silly. Especially for a Korean :’)
You: HOW DARE U I KILL YUUY
Stranger: Who is yuuy?
You: I KNOW WHERE U LIVE MUTHER SHITPOOP
Stranger: Where?
You: I WORK FOR GREAT GOOGLE IN SKY
Stranger: WHERE THE FUCK DO I LIVE?!?!?
You: I NO TELL U FLEE TO GREAT RUSSIA WHERE WE KILL U
Stranger: You are rude.
You: i bomb you
Stranger: Killing people is just bad manners.
You: FSACK YOU MOMSHITFUKWHORE
You: GOOGLEUM IS WATCHING U
Stranger: You want a handjob? Is that it?
You: HANDJOB IS WAT
Stranger: I will to stroke your penis with my hand.
You: U THREAEN MY COUNTRY FIRST MOTHER FUCKSHITWHOREDAWG
Stranger: You have happy ending.
You: FEMALE FUCKER
Stranger: Rub rub squirt.
Stranger: Oh
Stranger: I give you runnin.
You: UR HOAM SEXUALY
Stranger: Yes. Me likey women.
You: GREAT OMEGLE KNOWS WHO U R
You: WE OWN OMEGLE
Stranger: Yes? Then who am I?
You: WE FINDS U IN PARK AND SLTISY THROAT
You: SQUIRT SQUIRT SHAKE
Stranger: I seem to have forgotten my manners.
You: WAT MEEN U?
Stranger: I love you :’)
You: FORGIVENESS IS TOO LATE
You: CONSEQUNECES WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Stranger: I’ll fist you if you don’t kill me!
You: I COME AND kkILL U
Stranger: RUDE!
You: I TAKE PLANE TO LA
You: I FLY TO NEWMEXICO
You: I GO TO REAGANSHOSUEOTPOIA
Stranger: I live in new York dumb Asian.
You: I KILL U
You: I THEN FLY BACK AND KILLLO
You: DADDY0-O
You: I BE RWARED
You: I KILL
Stranger: I’ll fuck you if you don’t kill me. Preaseee!
You: I FUCK YOU FIRST
You: I RAPE YOUR SORRRRE MOUTH EYE
You: KILL
You: KIL
You: KI
You: K
Stranger: You can’t rape. You’re female.
You: I NO FEMALE
You: I FOOL U NO YES
You: I RAPE YOU\
Stranger: Yes, no.
Stranger: Okay.
You: WAT U EEN THIS YES NO?
Stranger: Rape me.
You: I FLY TO NEW YORK AND RAPE U
Stranger: I live in Texas, stupid.
You: THEN I CUM TO LA AAND RAPE THS FUHERE LINDSAY LEHAN
Stranger: She’s in jail.
You: I FUCK HER
Stranger: Cocaine.
You: FUCKERWHOTESHIT
Stranger: 8===D
You: WAT MEEN TIS
Stranger: Penis.
Stranger: Look at it.
Stranger: It’s a penis.
You: I CUT IT OFF
You: THEN U PAIN YES NO?
Stranger: Oh goodness!
Stranger: I pain. Yes, no. Yes
Stranger: No
Stranger: .
Stranger: Just kidding.
You: U DIE TOMOOROW
Stranger: U PAIN
Stranger: I’m deutsch.
You: I CUT YOU PENIZ THEN I EAT IT
Stranger: Wie heißt du?
You: WAT IS THIS
You: WAT MEEN U
Stranger: JA, AUF WIEDER SEHEN!!
You: YOU AARE GREAT GERMAN
You: ??
Stranger: SICH HEIL !!!
Stranger: JA
You: WE FREINDS WITH GREMAN GREAR
You: VIE HAIL;!
You: vIE hAIL
Stranger: WIE NOT VIE
Stranger: Dumb asian
You: WAT MEEN U
Stranger: You spelled it incorrectly, sirmadame.
You: FUK IT
Stranger: I like your style.
Stranger: You want a happy ending?
You: WAT MEEN U?
Stranger: I will jack you off.
Stranger: Tickle your pickle.
You: Hi
You: I am from ABC
You: My name is John Quintones
Stranger: Or in your case tootsie roll.
Stranger: Hello John.
You: We’re doing an experiment called “What would you do?”
Stranger: Yes?
You: You’re on live televeison
Stranger: It’s interesting to me that you can’t spell television correctly.
Stranger: John.
You: That’s a msitake
Stranger: Really? And I suppose what you just typed was as well?
You: yse
Stranger: Ha. Quite a sense of humor there Johnny.
You: WAT MEEN U?
Stranger: Hehe
You: WAT?
You: LOL WUT?
Stranger: 2
You: 3
You: 4
You: 5
You: 6
You: 7
You: 8
You: 9
Stranger: ^*^
You: I KILL U
Stranger: Cock.
You: VAGINA
Stranger: ++
You: –
Stranger: =
You: !=
Stranger: {}
You: G;L’;';LK
You: L
Stranger: Loser. You have no friends.
You: NO I HAS U
You: U NO FIRNED
You: U LUSER
Stranger: Awww :’>
You: KIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
You: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Stranger: Die?
Stranger: Death!
You: lIFE
Stranger: I love you pen pal.
You: I DON’T LOVE ME
Stranger: That is sad.
You: I HAVE A VERY LARGE MIND
Stranger: And very small penis.
You: FUK U
Stranger: Hehe
You: I KILL
You: U
You: NOW
Stranger: DO
You: RIGHT NOW
Stranger: IT
Stranger: PUSSAy?!!
You: GREAT CHINA CUM
You: BIG KOREAN COCK
Stranger: I swallow.
You: NO U CHOKE AND DIE
You: DIE
You: DIE
You: DIE
You: DIE
Stranger: DIE
You: DIE
You: DIE
You: DIE
You: DIE
Stranger: See, I’m helpful.
You: NO U DIE RUIDEE
Stranger: I’m a pornstar.
Stranger: My name is Lisa Ann.
Stranger: I’m a mild.
You: U HAS SEX FOR MONEY YES NO?
Stranger: Yes.
Stranger: No.
You: BOTH
You: ALL AT ONCE
Stranger: Yeah boi.
You: WAT BOI
You: WAT MEEN U?
Stranger: Boy. Stupid bitch.
You: WAT MEEN BITCH WHORE?
You: U WHORE
Stranger: Whore, bitch.
You: ME BOTH
You: YES NO?
Stranger: I wish.
You: WHY WISH
You: WAY DAT
Stranger: Cuz I would rock your fucking world.
You: HOW ROCK?
Stranger: With cock.
You: I HAVE COCK
You: AND PIG
You: AND TURKEY
Stranger: We could play star wars.
You: I HAS AN EGG
Stranger: In a barn.
You: WAT STAR?
You: U AMERICAN OR GERMEN?
Stranger: You love star wars. Don’t lie, you’re Asian.
You: I KNOW LIE
Stranger: I’m both. And French.
You: I GRETA CHINESE
You: IM FRENCH TOO
Stranger: Really?
You: IM ASSANG
You: ASSANGE
Stranger: I’m actually Mexican.
You: I OWN WIKILEAKS GREAT
Stranger: I meant norwiegan.
You: I AMERICAN REAGAN
You: I EAT BEEF
Stranger: Reagan is dead.
You: WAT?!!!
You: REGAN DIE
Stranger: Don’t insult my culture.
You: YES NO?
You: I NO INSULT
Stranger: Yes. Reagan die. Like 2 or 3 years ago.
You: I JUST KILL
You: REAGAN LIVE
You: GREAT AMERICAN LIE
You: U DIE
Stranger: I am great huh?
You: YOU LIE
You: YOU ARE LIAT
Stranger: I lie? I no lie.
You: YOU MOCKS MAI
Stranger: I’m not a lion.
You: WAT LION
You: WAT MEEN U?
Stranger: My furry wife.
You: WIFE? U CHRISTIAN?
Stranger: No.
You: GOOD
You: GREAT LIE GOD
You: CHINA IS ALL TRUTH
Stranger: Yes. God is a lie.
You: WE AGREE
You: CHINA IS GOD
You: YES NO?
You: IS U ALIVE TES NO?
You: I LEAVE IF NO ESPONSE?
You: I HAS TO KILL SPIES
You: I KNOW WHEER YOU LIVE
You: GOODBYE GREAT SIR MADAM GOD CHINA
You have disconnected.
August 11th, 2010 at 7:17 am
You: damn!
Stranger: what?
You: he disconnected
Stranger: aww,
You: attacked him with my massive dong
You: it was a critical hit
Stranger: LMFAOOO
You: i split his anus in two
Stranger:lmfaooo@@@@@
You: why are you laughing..
You: i wrote u a poem
Stranger:yay :]
You: roses are red
You violets are blue
You: ill fuck you with a rake
Stranger:LOL!
You: whats funny? ill tel you a joke
Stranger:FFINNEE (:
You: so, a man walks into a bar
You: he was an alcoholic so his life was really fucked up.
You: get it?
You have disconnected.
August 11th, 2010 at 7:04 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: hello sir
Stranger: hello slut
You: how did u know it was me?
You: tricky bastard
Stranger: i have a very good sense of smell
Stranger: now get on your knees
You: yes sir
Stranger: what’s your name girl?
You: call me as u want
You: master
Stranger: ok, cunt, i will
Stranger: and how old are you?
You: 19
Stranger: cunt i want you to tell me what specifically turns you on the most
Stranger: pain? humiliation? domination? or discipline?
You: a whip
Stranger: are you alone i where you are?
You: yes sir, as u recuested
Stranger: i want you to lock the door and then take off all your clothes
You: i already did master
You: is it okey if i call u master?
Stranger: yes slut, for now you may
Stranger: i’m behind you now, as you sit kneeling
Stranger: i run my fingers through your hair slowly
Stranger: and then grip and yank your head up hard
Stranger: i drag you up by your hair pull you up
Stranger: and then bend you over the table
You: go on
You: my dick is getting harder
Stranger: nice one
Stranger: real nice
Stranger: thanks a lot dude
You: haha
You: np
Stranger: i mean come on
Stranger: i don’t get it
Stranger: where’s the satisfaction?
You: right here
Stranger: jesus
Stranger: well, thanks for the hard on
Stranger: you complete and total wanker
You: hahaha
Stranger: i hope your balls rot and fall off
Stranger: i hope you get colon polyps
Stranger: rot and die asshole
Stranger: later
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
August 12th, 2010 at 7:45 am
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: heyy
Stranger: I miss you!
Stranger: Where have you been!
You: all over. You wouldn’t believe
Stranger: Greatness!
You: uh yah
Stranger: I have improved our plan|
Stranger: You must listen.
Stranger: This is important.
You: enlighten me
Stranger: So we should eat the baby while it’s still alive!
Stranger: Because cooking it would consume time.
Stranger: I don’t have that much free time.
You: yeah that makes sense…
Stranger: Then we can attack batman!
You: YES.
Stranger: Have you prepared the poisoned semen?
Stranger: HAVEYOU!?
You: of course, although you can’t imagine the lengths I had to go through to get it!
Stranger: I understand.
Stranger: The worst part will be to inject his small gay slave.
Stranger: Dressing in red.
You: idk, I’m kinda looking forward to that bit
Stranger: We have to do it right or he will die of it.
Stranger: Batman would probably sex him still.
Stranger: Cold or warm it doesn’t matter.
You: ok. well thanks for the update.
Stranger: NP.
You: I’ll meet you where the crows roost in two dawns, where we shall sip some ginger beer, then GET TO WORK!
Stranger: Ok.
Stranger: Good fap until then.
August 12th, 2010 at 9:28 pm
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: hi
You: HELLO
You: IS IT OK IF I USE CAPS ON?
Stranger: ok thats fine unless ur yellin at me
You: OK, GREAT, IF I YELL I’LL USE SOME KIND OF WARNING
Stranger: like what
You: LIKE
You: I HATE YOU(NOTE THAT I’M NOW YELLIN AT U)
Stranger: awesome thats verry easy to understand
You: INDEED
Stranger: so y caps?
You: THE BIGGER THE BEST
Stranger: thats quite true
You: I HOPE SO
Stranger: well what else is good big?
You: SOME BODY PARTS
Stranger: like?
You: PENIS TITS
You: HAIR
You: ?
Stranger: wich do u have
You: A PENIS, AND OFC I’M TYPING ON CAPS
You: IT’S A BONUS
Stranger: i dig it u wanna use that for somthing?
You: USE WHAT? MY DICK? OR MY WORDS?
Stranger: dick
You: OH, THERE R LOTS OF THINS Y CAN IMAGINE
Stranger: like what im in the mood
You: WELL, NOT AS MUCH AS U CAN WITH CAPS LOCKS
Stranger: well y dont u tell me bout it
You: OH I WILL
You: THERE ARE INFINIT COMBINATIONS OF WORDS
You: IT’S ENDLESS
You: WELL, I SEE YOU ARE IN THE MOOD
You: SO
You: LET’S TALK
Stranger: u first
You: WELL, AS I ENTER THE ROOM, I SEE U NAKED, ROLLING ON THE FLOOR
You: YOU LOCK YOUR EYES ON MY
You: AND I WALK TOWARDS YOU AND JOIN YOU
You: I START TAKING MY CLOTH OFF
You: BUY SUDDENTLY, I SENS SOMETHING IS WRONG
You: YOUR CAPS LOCK GOES ON
You: AND I CAN FEEL IT RISING UP
You: FROM YOUR PANTS
You: I PULL OUT MY GUN
You: POINT AT IT
You: AND FIRE
Stranger: wow take ur dick shove it up ur ass
August 17th, 2010 at 8:28 am
very good
August 19th, 2010 at 10:45 am
the force is strong in this one
August 28th, 2010 at 9:20 am
Stranger: hi
You: HI
Stranger: im with my gf, im introducing this site to her
You: well doneee
Stranger: how old are u?
You: 59
Stranger: lol
You: wtf
You: what is this ‘lol’
You: peolpe speak of
You: it does not make sence!
Stranger: laughing out loud
You: THIS IRRITATES ME
You: ARRRRRRRH
Stranger: kaboom?
You: RAWWWWR
You: hello,
You: this persons gf,
You: i would just like to inform you,
You: i gave your bf herpes.
You: and aids.
You: now your both going to die.
You: because you both have aids.
You: i am sorry to tell you this,
Stranger: i dont have herpes or aids lol xD
You: good luck
You: and goodbye..
You have disconnected.
September 6th, 2010 at 1:46 pm
Stranger: When did the world become full of zombies?
You: yesterday
Stranger: shoot, i missed it
You: too bad
Stranger: I’m on the moon right now
You: i know
Stranger: I’m also from the future
You: how far?
Stranger: I’m a robot named bender
Stranger: the year 3000
You: Oh yes. I builded you
Stranger: i bend things
You: i think i build you in 2000 years
Stranger: ahh
Stranger: do you know my friend R2-D2?
You: yes i do
Stranger: he is dead
You: oh
You:
Stranger: the zombies will get him
Stranger: i came back to stop them
You: i think so yes
You: Are you comming to protect me?
Stranger: yes
You: good
Stranger: …. if you are r2 d2
You: maybe i am
Stranger: maybe i will save you
You: cool, remember your birthday the 5th february 5100, when you promised me to save me
Stranger: no i forgot that
You: we made a deal
Stranger: well i guess i have to save you then
You: yes
Stranger: give me your cordinates
You: i dont remember my promise of the deal.. do you?
Stranger: are you at 50 degrees south 27 east?
Stranger: you said you would give me ice cream
Stranger: we all know who got the better end of this deal
You: thats lucky, i have a ice cream maschine for robots
You: that i builded
You: for you
You: and didnt know why.. now i do!
Stranger: i must leave the computer to come save you
You: that sounds fair
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
September 7th, 2010 at 3:35 pm
hey… your grammar is awful for my dog lol
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