Comments on: I’m From CIA | Funny Omegle Conversations [PIC]

By: Zezaz

Zezaz — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 08:32:44 +0000

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

You: hey ur the one who stole my underwear!!!!

You: Give it back!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger: ok ok geez

Stranger: here

You: hey is this a sperm???

You: U Cumm on it!!!!!!!!

Stranger: no

You: Clean IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger: i dont have sperm

You: u alien?

Stranger: its not my sperm im a girl

You: alien girl?

Stranger: yes

You: LOL

Stranger: i am alien girl and i will eat u

You: eat my dick

Stranger: ok

You: hahahaha

By: Max

Max — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 21:06:18 +0000

You’re now watching two strangers discuss your question!

Question to discuss:

whaaaaaaaazaaaaaaaap?

Stranger 1: Die, please.

Stranger 2: waaaasaaaaaap

Stranger 1: If you think that THIS is acceptable, you need to die.

Stranger 2: waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap

Stranger 1: OH.MY.GOD.

Stranger 1 has disconnected

By: Dana

Dana — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 13:52:43 +0000

You’re now watching two strangers discuss your question!

Question to discuss:

what does a boner feel like?

Stranger 1: ಠ_ಠ

Stranger 1: uhm

Stranger 2: What she said

Stranger 2:

Stranger 1: yeah thats what i thought

Stranger 2: After the operation…

Stranger 2: ._.

Stranger 1: but how the fuck am i supposed to explain o_O

Stranger 2: Lol

Stranger 2: Idk it’s weird right

Stranger 1: thats like im asking a girlk

Stranger 2: Explain it using examples in this room

Stranger 1: how does a wet pussy feel like

Stranger 1: oh well i actuall know

Stranger 1: but just as the giver and not as the reciever eh

Stranger 2: Yes

Stranger 2: Okay

Stranger 2: It feels like…

Stranger 2: Lots of blood as just been pumped into your dick to strengthen it and make it ready for sexual intercourse…

Stranger 1: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Stranger 1:
lulz

Stranger 1: word

Stranger 1 has disconnected

By: Dana

Dana — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 11:05:30 +0000

You’re now watching two strangers discuss your question!

Question to discuss:

why did you do it?

Stranger 2: SHE WAS FLIRTING WITH ANOTHER MAN

Stranger 1: hiiiii

Stranger 2: I COULDN’T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN

Stranger 1 has disconnected

By: The Nameless One

The Nameless One — Fri, 26 Aug 2011 22:18:10 +0000

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Question to discuss:

Create a story one word at a time

You: i

Stranger: am

You: a

Stranger: gret

You: **great

Stranger: big

You: douche

Stranger: bag

You: i

Stranger: have

You: orange

Stranger: tits

You: that

Stranger: are

You: busting

Stranger: green

You: pimples

Stranger: spewing

You: slime

Stranger: and

You: blood

Stranger: and

You: sick(?)

Stranger: dogs

You: my

Stranger: clit

You: is

Stranger: black

You: and

Stranger: purple

You: and

Stranger: squiting

Stranger: squirting*

You: i

Stranger: need

You: to

Stranger: have

You: a

Stranger: fat

You: queef

Stranger: to

You: get

Stranger: some

You: juices

Stranger: from

You: my

Stranger: horse’s

You: vagina

Stranger: then

You: i

Stranger: will

You: go

Stranger: and

You: club

Stranger: a

You: **an

You: orange

Stranger: to

You: get

Stranger: an

You: ** a

You: five

Stranger: star

You: chick

Stranger: to

You: beat

Stranger: my

You: dads

Stranger: cock

You: with

You: .

Stranger: the

You: end

Stranger: good

You: great story

Stranger: yesh

Stranger: asl?

You: m uk 18

Stranger: m23 us

You: nice meetin you

Stranger: u2

You: bye

Stranger: bi

You have disconnected.

By: THE PhEnOm

THE PhEnOm — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 07:59:30 +0000

You: hi!

Stranger: hi

You: WRONG!

You: try againg

Stranger: *again

You: *again

You: yep

You: haha

Stranger: hahah

You: lol

Stranger: MAU5

You: what?

Stranger: DEADMAU5

You: mau5?

You: aaah

You: deadman

You: THE PHENOOOM

Stranger: no MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5 MAU5

You: THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
UNDEEEERTAKEEEEEEER

Stranger: CTHULHUUUUUUUUU

You: MAY YOUR SOUL REST!

Stranger: SATANNNNNNNNNN

You: INNNN!!!!!

You: PEACE!

Stranger: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

You: there ain’t no grave can hold my body dow

You: n

Stranger: Weight problem?

You: no

You: i cant die

You: i will stay forever

Stranger: good for you

You: I WONT DIE

You: THE DEMONS DON’T DIE

Stranger: okay

Stranger: sure

You: ONLY HUMANS LIKE YOU

Stranger: yep

You: THERE ARE A LOT OF GRAVES CAN HOLD YOUR BODY DOWN

Stranger: yeah cuz I’m a fucking cat

You: SHOULD I LAUGH?

You: THE WAY I SEE IT

You: U R SOO SILLY

Stranger: ho lee schitt

Stranger: no way

You: U R FUCKING WITH ME?

You: U WANT PIECE OF ME?

You: AT WRESTLEMANIA I’LL FACE YOU

Stranger: no dude I’m straight

You: NOT ONLY YOU WILL HAND ME YOUR CHAMPIONSHIP

You: BUT YOU WILL PERSONALLY

You: HAND MY YOUR SOUL

Stranger: *Me.

You: YA

You: RIT

You: oops

You: IT’S NOT ME

You: IT’S SATAN COMPUTER

You: IT SUX

Stranger: you need to check your spelling or I’ll knock over YOUR SOUL

You: (THE AUTO-CORRECTION)

You: HAHA

You: DO YOU KNOW WHO R U TALKING WITH?

Stranger: AND COMPUTERS ARE FOR POOR PEOPLE WHO CAN’T AFFORD IPADS

You: ALL THE DEMONS ANSWER MR WITH “SIR”

Stranger: HELL NO

You: AND YOU ARE DISRESPECTING ME

You: YOUR SOUL

You: WILL BE DAMNED FOREVER

Stranger: okay

Stranger: I don’t believe in your shit I’m not scared

You: really u dont know me?

You: c’mon

You: where do u live?

Stranger: in a house

You: which country

You: ?

Stranger: in kenowhere

Stranger: usa

You: usa?

You: AND U DONT KNOW ME??????/

Stranger: no usa

You: THE UNDERTAKER?

Stranger: is this Tavo?

You: DONT MAKE FUN OF ME!

You: really

Stranger: then I don’t know you.

You: u dont know the undertaker?

You: c’mon

You: haha

You: don’t u watch wwe?

Stranger: no

You: sorry if i’m rude sometimes

Stranger: that

You: but an evil soul

Stranger: is

You: take over me

You: sometimes

Stranger: gay

You: UR DAD IS U BITCH

Stranger: is this Steve Willis?

Stranger: holy crap I’m my own father

You: haha

You: really funny

You: hahaha

You: i meant :
UR DAD IS
U BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Stranger: …

Stranger: same thing

You: no

You: U R SOOO STUPID

Stranger: okay

You: thnx

You: u r welcome

Stranger: ?

You: yes

You: iknow

You: and u know

You: and we know know

You: what they know

Stranger: You see, I came here to troll the shit out of some horny people. It’s not working out because of you.

You: ya

You: lol

You: 2 trolls here

You: u know what this mean?

Stranger: whut

You: THE JUDGMENT DAY IS NEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAR

You: AND WE ALL GONNA DIE!

You: U WILL

You: UR MOMMA

You: UR DADDA

You: BUT I WON’T

You: DEMONS NEVER DIES

You: MUHAHAHAHAHA

Stranger: my parents are already dead

You: UR GIRLFRIEND WILL DIE

You: UR WIFE

You: UR CHILDRENS

You: UR GRANDPA

You: UR UNCLES

You: UR BROTHERS & SISTERS

Stranger: I don’t have a gf or wife or children or gpa or uncles

You: UR FRIENDS

You: YOU!!!!!!

Stranger: no bro or sis and I fucking hate my friends and I’m already dead

You: REALLY?

Stranger: yes

You: good

You: where r u sitting now?

You: hell or heaven?

Stranger: I’m standing

You: lol

You: where r u standing then?

You: haha

You: NYAHAHAHA

Stranger: I’m the goddamn Batman. I stand wherever the fuck I feel like standing

Stranger: on a roof

Stranger: on your face

Stranger: on the ground

Stranger: on jesus’ shoulder

You: lol

Stranger: on your mom

You: u infedale

You: FUCK U

You: haha

You: i dont want 2 say anything about ur mom

You: coz my dad is with her now

You: THEN LET ME ASK U A QUESTION!

Stranger: I’m sorry undertaker but I’m standing on your fathers grave now

You: OH YA?

Stranger: yes

You: I HAVE A QUESTION 4 YA SMARTASS

Stranger: What is your intelligent question?

You: HOW DO U KNOW WHEN UR MOTHER KISSED U IN THE MORNING (WHEN U WAS A KID) SHE DIDN’T GIVE UR DAD (OR MINE {THE SAME[LOL]}) A BLOW JOB BEFORE SHE KISSES YOU?

You: c’mon

You: answer smartass

You: !!

Stranger: because my parents are dead. my mom tried to kiss me so I killed her ass and my dad was just fucking ugly.

Stranger: what’s your excuse?

You: OH

You: I GOT IT NOW

You: HERE IS THE STORY OF UR LIFE
UR DAD IS DEAD A LONG TIME AGO AND UR MOM HAD 2 WORK AS A SLUT 2 EARN SOME MONEY MY DAD DIDN’T USE 2 FUCK UGLY GIRLS BUT UR MOM INSISTED HE ACCEPTED FOR 4 $
BUT UNFORTUNETLY

You: UR MOM WAS OUT OF CONDOMS

You: SO HE CUMMED IN HER UGLY PUSSY

You: AND U CAME BY MISTAKE

You: AND WHEN U GRANDPA KNEW ABOUT THIS

You: HE KILLED UR MOM

You: AND SENT U TO THE ORPHANS HOUSE

You: am i right?

You: then ur grandma killed ur grandpa coz he killed ur mom

You: and etc….

You: i dont want 2 get into details

You: AM I RIGHT?

Stranger: As I have said, I’m the goddamn Batman. I have no beginning or end

You: i am super man’

Stranger: fuck you and your speedo

You: ok

Stranger: ok

You: ok

Stranger: ok

Stranger: o

You: ok

You: o

You: ko

You: k

You: okk

Stranger: ok

You: WAIT!

Stranger: ok

You: i know U!!

Stranger: ok

You: I KNOW UR NAME

You: !

Stranger: What is it.

You: DO UKNOW MY NAME

You: UR NAME IS STRANGER!

You: AND MY NAME IS YOU

You: nice 2 meet u stranger

Stranger: Dumbass.

You: what does dumb ass means???

Stranger: Your name is Pussy and my name is Jesus

You: does it mean that i am so pretty?

You: i am you

You: and you are stranger

You: what does pussy means?

You: and who is jesus?

You: where am i ?

You: what is this place

Stranger: It means your face looks nice today and Jesus is just some German dude who killed some Jews

You: aha

Stranger: and this is Hell. Welcome

You: who r jews?

You: what r german?

You: is this a food>

You: ?

You: hell?

You: ya i know hell

You: it’s near ur home

You: rit?

Stranger: No no no no and no shut up eryn

You: eryn?

You: really

You: what does this mean?

Stranger: I’m bleeding for real.

You: ???

You: did u hurt yourself honey?

You: i a mso sorry for ya?

You: does it hurt?

You: *i am so sorry

Stranger: Yeah baby I was making you a wooden dildo. it’s just a splinter

You: cooool

You: do u like 2 get fucked with dildo???

Stranger: yes.

Stranger: it makes me feel special

You: ILL MAKE YOU FEEL SPECIAL NOW

You: U ASSHOLE

You: ok

You: its fucking time

You: should i fuck u from ur ass or pussy man?

Stranger: I’d prefer my ass if you don’t mind, bro.

You: yeeew

You: i dont

Stranger: okay

You: ok

You: ay

You: ok

You: ay

Stranger: ok

Stranger: ok.ok

Stranger: ok

You: FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger: ok

Stranger:

Stranger: ok

You: tell me when u r done

Stranger: ok

Stranger: I think I’m done

Stranger: ok

Stranger: ok.

Stranger: ok..

Stranger: ok…

You: good

You: __|__

Stranger: now I’m done

You: put this in ur ass

Stranger: ))—-C===8

You: how does it feels?

You: WTF IS THIS?

Stranger: hold on…

Stranger: ah just came

Stranger: now can you stop being a fab?

Stranger: *Fag

Stranger: autocorrect

You: nyahahahahaa

You: NYAHAHAHAHAHA

Stranger: … cleverbot was more fun than this

You: who?

You: UR DAD?

Stranger: Nyan nyan nyan

Stranger: no

Stranger: オカマ。。。黒須!

You: nyan nyan?

Stranger: 入れ。

You: WHAT???

Stranger: 日本ごはなさい?

You: HELLO?

You: IS THAT U?

You: ناخيبتللب؟

Stranger: 今一羽

You: يبليسغلبسيهخب

You: يسباسيغسشخهبسخشب7علفشسينبتسيهشابعشسيبغعشسبخهسشابعنسشبغس!!

You: سلسيشل8صث0غ9ضخيئطكسؤزةوءار ر0-شثق؟؟؟؟؟

You: ANSWER MR

Stranger: グゴルツランスラウ。。。

Technical error: internal error.

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Check it out!

By: random quiz lol

random quiz lol — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 07:27:53 +0000

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: Hello, would you like me to quiz you about your general knowledge?
The rules are as follows: You have ten seconds to answer each question. There’s a total of 15 questions to be answered. Are you still in?

You: ok

Stranger: Okay, here goes:

Stranger: 1. Who painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel?

You: wtf

Stranger: 2. Who wrote the novella “The Old Man and the Sea”?

You: billy jackson

Stranger: 3. Who is the most-winning cyclist ever?

You: a cAT

Stranger: 4. Who was Nostradamus?

You: a man

Stranger: 5. Which thrash-metal bands are considered as “the big four”?

You: dora the explorer

Stranger: 6. What is Ferdinand Magellan famous for?

You: farting

Stranger: 7. Where did the search engine “Yahoo!” get it’s name from?

You: google

Stranger: 8. Why does Robinson Crusoe name his companion “Friday”?

You: becuase it was saterdae

Stranger: 9. Which Academy Award-winning film is Anthony Hopkins most famous for?

You: writing

Stranger: 10. What does the word “onomatopoeia” mean?

You: somthin in english

Stranger: 11. Who wrote the song “Like a Rolling Stone”?

You: the flinstones

Stranger: 12. What does the word “Allah” mean?

You: fuck

Stranger: 13. What is the highest mountain outside of Asia?

You: k2

Stranger: 14. What is the song “American Pie” all about?

You: about…. i knw this… i forgot

Stranger: 15. Which Iron Maiden album did you enjoy the most?

You: da 1st 1

Stranger: Which was named?

You: idk

Stranger: Okay

Stranger: You had:

Stranger: *drumroll*

Stranger: ZERO correct answers

Stranger: This gives you a virtual last place

Stranger: The leader leads by three points

Stranger: Adieu

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

By: Mr. Penisbreath

Mr. Penisbreath — Fri, 06 May 2011 18:34:31 +0000

Stranger: Halo
Stranger: AV or first-past-the-post?
You: Tell me your secret.
Stranger: ASL?
Stranger: H&K?
Stranger: I love cider
Stranger: i prefer it to beer
Stranger: I coudn’t tell my friends from home– they’re rip the shit out of me
Stranger: *they’d
You: Cut the bullshit and tell me how magntes worj.
You: work*
You: magnets*
Stranger: It’s because of the way that metal bonds
You: (fuck I’m using a fucked up netbook )
You: No way, you are lying.
Stranger: there are 3 kinds of bond between atoms– covalent which shares valent electrons, ionic which makes positive (+ve) and negative (-ve) ions which are attracted to each other
Stranger: The 3rd is metalliod bonding
You: Holy shit thats lot of science crap. Just tell me the spell already.
Stranger: Metals are defined by the fact that they lose their electrons and sit in a sea of electrons.
You: The exams are begining next week.
Stranger: Tempory dipoles (more electrons are up one end) are formed which pulls the metal in one direction or the other.
Stranger: It’s all about electros
Stranger: *electrons
Stranger: I presume you’re doing GCSE?
Stranger: http://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnets
You: Fuck, I can’t understand English science, I’m from Greece you know.
Stranger: Ah, ok
You: I don’t believe in science I’m sure magnets are magic.
You: There is no way.
Stranger: http://el.wikipedia.org/wiki/%CE%9C%CE%B1%CE%B3%CE%BD%CE%AE%CF%84%CE%B7%CF%82
Stranger: Well, science explians te magic
You: HOLY SHIT
You: ITS THE MAGIC SPELL IN GREEK
Stranger: Just becuase you know how the trick is done, doesnt stop it being magic
You: THANK YOU SATAN
Stranger: hahaha
You: I WANNA ENLARGE MY ENORMOUS PENIS
Stranger: well it’s all greek to me…
You: WHATS THE SPELL FOR THAT
Stranger: You put a meat hook through your Prince Albert and bungee jump from it
You: FUCK YEAH
You: HAIL SATAN

By: Mr. Penisbreath

Mr. Penisbreath — Fri, 06 May 2011 18:15:44 +0000

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: You fucking perv
Stranger: yes
You: I own a horse, but I still don’t know how magnets work.
Stranger: cool..
You: EXPLAIN ME HOW MAGNETS WORK
You: NOW
You: I PAID YOU
Stranger: eletrons..
You: WHERE’S MAH SHIT ?
Stranger: moving from one side to the other
You: CUT THE BULLSHIT
Stranger: are you fucking your horse?
You: YES
Stranger: good..
You: IF I FEEL LIKE IT
You: WHERE’S MY SHIT MAN ?
You: I PAID YOU
Stranger: female or male horse?
You: I WANNA KNOW HOW MAGNETS WORK
You: DON’T TALK BULLSHIT ABOUT ELEKTRONS AND SHIT
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

By: Marisa

Marisa — Tue, 15 Mar 2011 23:31:42 +0000

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: If you aren’t Darthvader, Batman, Robin, OR Harry Potter… THEN WHO ARE YOU?!?!
Stranger: I’m voldemort… AWKWARD.
You: o.O
You: Awkward is right o.O
Stranger: Indeed, so… What’s this about Harry, you seen him?
You: No I am looking for him too o.O
Stranger: Tom Riddle?
Stranger: is that you?
You: No.
Stranger: Snape?
You: no
You: This is Harry’s bitch. He didn’t pay me last night.
Stranger: God, i heard he does that often.
You: Yeah I replaced that hoe Ginny or whatever.
Stranger: If only we could take away his fucking invisibility cloak
You: I put it on his dick and used magic to make it stay. Win.
Stranger: LOL.
You: I figured you would be proud:D
Your conversational partner has disconnected.